Would you stay with your husband???

Question

Would you stay with your husband for your child if you no longer felt you were in love him. Even if he his the nicest guy in the world and worshipped the ground you walked on.At one point we were deeply in love but latley I seem to not feel anything.

Unfortunately my brother in law has put unnecessary strain on our relationship He has since moved out.
But I think its more than that

Answer 1

sounds like what im going through right now, except my husband is the one thats not "in love" anymore. i think you should stay and give it some time. unless he's mean to you. i think you've just hit a rut and need to come out of it. start spending more time with him, doing things that you used to do. a good husband is hard to find, so don't let go unless you are absolutely sure. i dont want you waking up one day and regretting it. just stick it out, im sure if you try the feelings will come back. you fell in love with him for a reason. right. it will come back if you let it, dont fight it. i hope everything works out well for you. and remember, the grass is no greener on the other side. if you have a good man, the grass is probably burnt on the other side. a good man is hard to find, but a sorry man is a dime a dozen. oh, and at least if you give it a try and it doesnt work, you can say you done everything in your power to save your marriage, that you didnt just give up when the going got rough.

Answer 2

Why not try to figure out what the problem is.

Please don't take the advice of someone on here that randomly replys,,,,,,just leave him, get out !!!

There must have been something there before that brought you guys together and kept you there, and I bet if you put your mind to it, you can figure it out. If you can't, try to get some counseling: I know everybody says that, but think,,,,,Are you going to ruin what you thought was a messed up relationship over something that can be worked out?

I've always told people to try to find a "spark" iin thier lives, something different, that they both have never experienced before--sexual or not: it could be a free night out w/out the child, it could be a weekend getaway planned for once every three months, a new nightie, or kamasutra, or whatever IT may be.

You've invested alot into this life, I'm sure you had dreams of a family, retiring, getting old together, right? If you did, you owe it to the BOTH of you to at least "give it one last shot".

If you can, imagine yourself alone in an apartment, without your kid. You have friends but they seem distant because of the recent break up. Your famliy doesn't understand why you did what you did. Your child is away with father, perhaps for the weekend or on a permanent basis but cries and is deeply disturbed because of the trauma at an early age. How do you console that child when it comes back to you? Let me tell you, words don't fix **** with young ones.

I won't carry on about it here, but I really think you owe it, not just for your husband, your child, but I think you owe it to yourself. I think you have the responsibility to step up to the plate and say you can do it.

You've already gotten to first base--you've admitted that there's a problem, now turn it into a homerun. Fix it, get rid of the problem, round the bases and come home. You should be happy in your life but the fact is, life aint easy and sometimes you gotta work hard at it, 'casue NOBODY is going to serve it to you on a silver platter.

Goodluck & Godspeed

That sound good

Answer 3

Yes I would. I have been married 10 years to a GREAT man. After being married a few years I started to feel the same way. The feelings just weren't there as much and I felt like I just couldn't breath. It took about a year and alot of him persuading me but I finally came around and now I have never been so in love. It has been about 6 years since then and I feel very good about our marriage. I would stick around for a little while longer, but try and get a little room to breath for awhile. If nothing changes in a year or so, and your just unhappy, then get out. This is all based on the fact that you said he is the nicest guy, if he treats you really good, then try and see if you can work it out, if not...then at least you tried. Good luck hun.

Answer 4

There have been many studies dine in the effects of divorce on children and most experts agree that you should stay together if it is not an abuse situation, i think you and hem heed to have a heart to heart. I would seek help from a counsler so unhappiness dosent turn into resentment. You can work through this. There was a reason you loved him in the first place. GOOD LUCK! I also wanna ad I went through something similar but I wasnt worshiped. We are doing well now. Kids are your 1st priority. I was a child of divorce and I ended up quiting school and having all kinds of problems Im not blaming my parents but I havent spoken with my dad in 10 years and he ws onse a doting father I have trie and tried to get contact...his name is in the phone book.
I pray that you stay together marriage is sacred.. a threesome of you your husband and god.

Answer 5

I guess I am staying for the kids.Same thing, we were deeply in love, we tried to have a baby for 5 years, right after we gave up trying I got pregnant. So now we have a baby, plus our other kids (his and mine). Now nothing is the same, I just don't feel 'IT' anymore, but he knows something is up and goes above and beyond what he ever has before. Yep my ground is worshiped, but I am annoyed and tired and want to go. Now he finally got off his butt and filled out the paperwork for buying a house - and I am in a PANIC, that is another major thing that will be so hard to get out of if I need to.

Sorry to go on, but I do know where you are coming from and wish I could help you more.

Answer 6

Yes, I would stay. He sounds like a wonderful guy who adores you, and you have a child together.

Marriages go in waves and cycles, and things change if you stay married for a long time. You will fall in love with him again, I'm sure.

Make an effort to keep things exciting, and if necessary, go to counselling (maybe by yourself at first).

I'm a big believer in marriage, and think divorce should only be an option in extreme situations. To me you are not in an extreme situation, and many women would envy you.

I hope you will give your marriage another go. This man sounds worth it.

Answer 7

Wow you took the words out of my mouth. I am going thru the exact same thing and I don't know what to do we are currently not living together for the last 3 weeks but this can't go on forever the kids are starting to ask where is daddy :( I just don't know what to do he is a great father and a great husband but i just don't have those feelings for him anymore and every time we are together if we are not fighting there is nothing to talk about other then the kids. When you figure it out please let me know cause im in the same "rut" as you.

G'luck

Answer 8

I went through a time when I felt I was not in love with my husband. Lasted for about a year. I didnt hate him, just didnt feel in love. Now things are better than ever and I feel more in love then ever. Odd how things happen...maybe stress or something was affecting me before??? Maybe bored??? We've been together for 11 years, and 2 kids...this happened at about the 8 year mark.

Answer 9

It's never a good idea to stay married just for the children. You don't want to raise your children with someone you don't love. You want to teach your children how true love is between two people. I think that you should talk with your husband and see how he feels about the whole situation.

Answer 10

Love given, freely returns a hundred fold! It's the partners, honey that create harmony and love in a relationship, not just the one, but the two! Wow! A guy that actually adores you and with a world full of " unhappy" relationships, you want to throw it all away. Something is definitely wrong here.
Here's what I would suggest for you to do, dear. Quit being so negative about your relationship, stop thinking about yourself and your needs and feelings. Start thinking about this guy, who you say loves you and adores you, start loving him back unconditionally and I grant you that the spark will return like you wouldn't believe. Lavish your partner and minimize his faults, instead magnify his virtues and in no time you will feel differently. God Bless!