My Wife is in Jail,?

Question

She was arrested and charged with felony failure to appear 2 days ago for stealing money orders at work 5 months ago. When I asked her to come back to me she assured me that charges were dropped. I then asked her to marry me. I know i was foolish, but wow what a woman. This is not the first time she has lied and lied and lied. I mean I have no trust for her at all and I know for a fact this is her third time in jail sents I met her. I am not going to bail her out cause I don't have $20,000 bail moneys and don't want to waste my time. I guess I'm asking, should I stick with her or run for my life????

Answer 1

This is your decision entirely. There are people who stay with "sick" partners and there are those who leave. I've done both so I couldn't very well tell you what to do.
Until this woman gets help, and why is she stealing?, she is going to be troublesome and may even take you down with her. And do you think your love will make her healthy, it won't by the way. Sometimes the only way for people to get help is for everyone to completely desert them. Then and only then, do they see the error in their ways.
If you stay on this path with her you must realize that sick people are not capable of loving others, so the only love in this relationship will be one sided. Your needs will not be met and will be swept under the rug. Is this something you are willing to experience? Also, the longer you stay with someone who is sick the more you risk becoming sick yourself, are you willing to pay that price?
You sound like a loyal person, and a kind person, why not find someone worthy of your attributes and let this gal get on with being sick. She cannot and will not get healthy when someone is enabling her.
A blind guess tells me this gal has a problem with illicit drugs or gambling, both conditions that need proper treatment. If this is the case or close, yes, do get out of the way and let the disease of addiction run its course. She may die, whether you are there or not, but miracles happen every day in the life of addicts and recovery is possible, just don't get run over by the bus.
If I am wrong on this, I apologize, but either way the girl is sick and needs help. Good luck and contact me through my profile page if you need too.

Answer 2

Run for your life if she has lied to you over and over again she doesn't deserve you. She is stealing money orders from work?? WOW!!! That takes some guts!! How can you be with someone you can't even trust?? What kind of a relationship is that? You will always question her and question what she is doing and if she is telling you the truth or not. You deserve way better than that!! There are tons of fish in the sea go for it and have fun doing it!! Good Luck!

Answer 3

that is really a question only you can answer, but think about this, do you really think you can change a person? do you think it is easy to make a person honest? how do you stop a liar from lying? and how many different ways are there for you to get hurt in this type of situation? If you love some one, you love them no matter what, but when your a couple you don't just ruin your life, you ruin your partners too by your actions. If this person has been in jail 3 times already you can bet that it will happen again...the question is do you want to be there when it happens? You deserve better, you deserve more....follow your heart.

Answer 4

My right gut - the most base and instincual part of me - says to mock you for being a sucker.

I'm not going to do that, since this is a serious issue.

If she's lied once to you, then she will lie again to you. If you feel you cannot trust her, then, well, don't. I would argue in favor of a divorce, particularly if she's going up the river.

Answer 5

Are you really that daft? Yes, run for your life. Also for good measure, move to a different place, change your phone number, and if you can afford it, sell your car and get a different one. Be sure to check your credit report for at least the next year. If she lived with you she probably had access to your SSN and driver license. She can open fake credit card accounts using your information and financially ruin you. Also get a restraining order against her and DIVORCE HER NOW.

Answer 6

I have a couple questions for you first.
1.) your post says YOUR WIFE is in Jail
2.) Why did you ask your wife to marry you?
3.) Why would you spend your life with someone you don't trust?
4.)Would you want any children growing up in this environment?

My advice is to move on.

Answer 7

It really depends on how much you love her.You say you have no for her so that will be a problem in itself.Think long and hard about your relationship and then decide if you want to wait for her,is it worth the wait or do you think you will be wasting your time.

Answer 8

well, you married her for better or worse, guess you got the short end of the stick. But I don't know that I would let her rot in jail, guess i'm too sensitive a person. I would help her only if she came clean, then i would leave her.

Answer 9

sorry man. love is great but shes a liar, maybe shes a compulsive liar and can get help but, also maybe she needs someone to stick by her and help her through this, perhaps your the man to do this, but at this moment she casnt be trusted and you never can trust her, unless you both take the help journey good luck brother if i was you id probaly try for the help mode giver her one more chance as long as you can learn to trust her and not be paraniod thats shes lying in the future

Answer 10

It would be different if you had a solid history with this woman; however, you don't. It sounds like it has been lies from day one. It will not get any better. Run...