when i came out of the closet to a few friends they felt the need to tell my other friends. I lost one of my best friends, she just started ignoring me, and never left me explain to her...i used to take her to the hospital to visit her sick father when no one else would take her...so do i have good reason she never left me tell her about me being a lesbian? im still upset that she just disowned me
2006-07-26 12:52:32 · 26 answers · asked by ? 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
listen, you don't need "friends" who decide whether you're "good enough" based on your sexual preference.
it's mean.
it's shallow.
it's non-sense.
the values supporting that kind of logic claim someone or a group of people are inferior or wrong based on everything but what matters most... that is character. ...the emotion behind it all is fear-based.
good luck! your awesome for living life genuinely. can you imagine being afraid of a person or a group of people just because they have brown hair?
...life is way too hard as it is! ... it would be unbearably shallow if ANY person had to pretend to be something/ someone s/he is not.
peace, love, & enlightenment
2006-07-26 13:07:07 · answer #1 · answered by Cassor 5 · 6⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry that you're going through that. I sure hope she didn't disown you. Maybe, it was just alot for her to take in at once and she needs some time to deal with this new info. If she is truly a genuine friend she will come back around and start talking to you again when she realizes what a good friend you've been to her and how important the bond between you two is. Best of luck to you.
2006-07-26 12:59:20 · answer #2 · answered by Justme 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, I lost my best friend of 16 years when I made the mistake of coming out to her. We'd been through thick and thin together during our college years and for years after. When I finally sucked up the nerve to tell her she told me out right she could not and would not be a part of my life. It broke my heart but I have to wonder now if she was really a true friend after all. My suggestion to you is to try and see if your area has a local lesbian group. Yahoo Groups is a GREAT place to start. I found a lesbian group in my area that shares email through Yahoo groups as well as has get togethers too. Have made some really good friends and it's helped fill the void of my best friend.
2006-07-26 13:28:32 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people feel uncomfortable with people who are lesbian or gay. It's human nature. Although for some it may be because of religion. People don't seem to fully understand that a friend that they've known for a long time is still the same person that they knew, and that they just learned something new about that friend.
2006-07-26 12:58:20 · answer #4 · answered by dogmatitans 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The hardest thing I'm sure for you was to come out, but the friends you told didn't have the decency to allow you to handle this your own way. Maybe your friend felt a little betrayed coming from someone else instead of you. Give her a little time and maybe she will come around. Explain to her this was difficult for you as well and I think the best way to get it all out is to meet at a neutral place, maybe for coffee and have a nice heart to heart. Good Luck!
2006-07-26 13:34:27 · answer #5 · answered by CTMEDS 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry you lost one of your best friends. She's obviously not a good friend, because she doesn't love you for who you are. Don't worry. I could be your friend, if you want. I'll respect you, regardless of your sexual orientation. I'm not gay, but I personally don't understand what people have against gays, lesbians, and bisexuals. They're people, too. And I don't think sexual orientation something that you choose. It's not your fault that you like girls instead of guys. Your "friend" is being ridiculous. Since she can't accept you for who you are, don't talk to her anymore.
2006-07-26 13:17:02 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ah don't be upset, it's her loss not yours. Do you really want someone who obviously has a problem with lesbians to be your friend anyway? Do you need someone like that so badly? You will make new friends. Do not worry. People are not always fair to you, but you can still be fair to them.
2006-07-26 12:55:54 · answer #7 · answered by surfer2966 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You every reason to be upset.....but at least now you know they weren't really your friends. Friends are there no matter what....I know it's hard but don't stay angry and upset to long...think of it like this, those who left your side just made room for better people to come in your life.
2006-07-26 12:58:07 · answer #8 · answered by Harlem 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should try to contact her and explain to her that you're still the same person you were, and your sexual life has nothing to do with your friendship.
And if that doesn't work, they weren't your friends to begin with...which is so easy for me to type down here but it's so hard to actually deal with in real life!!
2006-07-26 13:37:21 · answer #9 · answered by Adam G 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you will find that those who truely did love you will stand by you no matter what and those who can just that easily walk away were not look for new friends ones that won't just leave you when things start to get interesting i lost some to but gained a wonderful spouse
2006-07-26 12:58:44 · answer #10 · answered by lady heather 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋