Okay. So. My boyfriend and I actually met on the internet (thats not the lame part) This was about 4 years ago. Since then we have met several times and he is now moved 1,000 miles to be with me. We love each other dearly....and I certianly dont EXPECT this out of him but...
He never buys me anything. Im not talking diamonds or other jewlerey. But...I mean...nothing. Nothing! Not even stupid little cheap cute things. Is this normal? The only flowers I have gotton are "im sorry" flowers.
2006-07-26 12:46:59 · 59 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
He buys me food, cigrettes, candy when im craving it. You know...those kinda things...which I do for him too. But girls like surprises once in a while.
2006-07-26 12:59:48 · update #1
Don't worry about that! Guys aren't trained to know what girls like. They're dummies when it comes to that. You literally have to tell them. I've been with my fiance for nearly 7 years and he's not too quick to catch on. Does that make me love him any less? No. You should perhaps move past your materialistic dreams and look at other ways he makes you happy. When we first dated, it bothered me that my boyfriend didn't get me presents, but I moved past that and discovered that there are so many other ways he does things to put a smile on my face. Taking out the garbage, cooking, vacuuming are all little gestures that go a long way.
Look past material objects and look at other ways he can make you happy.
2006-07-28 09:08:19 · answer #1 · answered by bonjovifan 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
surely wait. i'm 26, operating my way by college with a husband doing a similar, battling charges, and that i do not forget that there is not any way that i ought to help a toddler at present. it must be a lot tougher for an adolescent! imagine about it ... you purely isn't on your mom and father' well being coverage continuously (in case you even are at present) and having a toddler (and then following up with pediatrician visits) is so truly severe priced. one among my coworkers purely at the moment had a toddler and had to pay $4000 only for the drugs she were given throughout shipping ... and that is WITH well being coverage! Getting a properly paying pastime is hard for someone and not using a good coaching, and in spite of coaching is hard for an adolescent - a lot of places do not employ human beings less than or round 18. Plus, your youngsters and early 1920s are the time to have relaxing and pass out and do stuff which includes your friends ... hit the bars, go back and forth in case you want to, purely be able to drop each and every thing and do something loopy and relaxing in case you want. a toddler ought to change each and every thing ... you've quite some time to have toddlers contained in the destiny ... wait!
2016-10-15 06:07:19 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do U find that he's cheap in everything? Or just when it comes to U? U may want to sit him down and explain to him how it makes U feel. If he doesn't want to sit and talk about it leave it in a note. Do U buy him things? Perhaps the next time he buys U "I'mSorry" flowers U should give them back. I know it's the only thing you'll ever get from him, but he has to learn. But the best thing to do is tell him. Lots of guys don't get hints.
2006-07-26 12:53:12 · answer #3 · answered by Gremlin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's just cheap. The last boyfriend I dumped was like that, this wasn't the reason why I ended things with him. Basically I ended up paying for gas, movies, my own dinner, everything. To him though, when I brought it up, it was a shock to him. I had to ask him to buy me a drink when we'd go out! I mentioned to him that I wished he treated me more like his girlfriend, but it was a forced effort. For birthday and Christmas gifts he had to ask me how much I spent...but he never spent the same, always less. This one time when we went out to Starbucks for coffee, about 4 months into the relationship, he let me order first, I ordered mine, then the lady asked if that was everything, I said no, and turned to my guy...I get a look of shock, and says "these aren't together, are they?". So I said, no, yeah, thats fine, I'll buy my own...then he went to order, and pay, he used a fu(king gift certificate...I was really upset when that happened. I needed a guy that would treat me like him girlfriend, and I understood that not everyone has a lot of extra money, but he could have made things for me, or at least offered. It frustrated me, and I felt alot better once I broke up with my guy though. My advice, talk to him, bring it to his attention, tell him you want more from the relationship, and hope that he changes, if he doesn't, girl there will be someone out there that'll treat you like a princess!
2006-07-26 13:02:33 · answer #4 · answered by Hannah 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he is testing. Does he really know your likes and dislikes yet? Does he know your favorite color, flower,what you collect? These things take time. Is he helping pay the living expenses?Is he employed there yet? Nothing like answering a question with a question. Did he buy you things before he move in?
I find it hard to call him a cheap skate.Do I still get 2 points for giving you food for thought?.
2006-07-26 12:57:15 · answer #5 · answered by kayboff 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's completely normal - my husband has never bought anything for me (other than birthday & christmas) unless I was very specific that I wanted him to buy it and when. Some guys just don't do things like this - if it really bugs you, tell him about it. Keep in mind, though, that he must really love you to have moved 1000 miles to be with you, and that is a much greater gesture than buying you a crappy stuff.
2006-07-26 12:49:52 · answer #6 · answered by Tammy O 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I don't think you're being materialistic, but really, you should stop obsessing about what he HASN'T done.. and think about all he HAS done. Is he the type that buys stuff? Do you think he's cheap? Maybe he thinks that you don't need to be bought things in order to know that he loves you. Atleast you get I'm Sorry flowers.. lots of women don't even get that... just be happy loving him.
2006-07-26 12:50:54 · answer #7 · answered by Imani 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you buy him things? Maybe he doesn't know you want them? Are there other ways he shows his love (other than moving 1000 miles....that's pretty big by the way...)? Don't worry about it, as long as you love each other and trust him your relationship sounds great. If you are really concerned, ask him in a non threatening way why he doesn't buy you things, or drop hints " George just bought Ellen the cutest stuffed animal... he is so sweet to her, she is really lucky..." maybe he'll get the hint! good luck!
2006-07-26 12:50:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW! Maybe he's too cheap to buy them for ya? Why dont ya just tell him about it. Being honest in ur relationship is the best thing to do. If ya cant come out n tell him then give him lil hints n clues here n there until he gets it. Good luck!
2006-07-26 12:50:43 · answer #9 · answered by *Cupcake* 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh dear. Here's the minimalist guy. Only doing the bare minimum to get by with you. And for 4 years, you've let him get away with it. I'm not saying men need to shower us with constant lavish gifts, but damn...my boyfriend buys me things on a whim because he knows I'll love it...like when he got me blueberry jelly to keep at his house (we don't live together) and he hates blueberries. It was his way of saying he wants me to be happy when I'm there. He bought me stone crabs when they were in season ($60 for 2 claws! OUCH) and I tried to tell him he didn't have to get them for me (he HATES crabs) he insisted that to watch me enjoy them would make him happy.
After 4 years, now you must speak up. Now or never! And based on what he says to this, you'll have to decide if you want to spend forever with a guy who never buys you even a Big Mac or not. I wouldn't. Good luck!
2006-07-26 12:52:00 · answer #10 · answered by SuperJenn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋