I have a full time job like my husband and I get home 1hr later than he does but he still wants?

Question

me to get home and cook, sometimes i do but other times I'm as tired as he is so why can i get home and have a beer while watching tv! Is he right...should i be cooking everyday bcuz I'm the lady of the house? I would like to but I just can’t sometimes. I Mean he's a great guy and I would love for him to have a hot meal but I work too...am i being a baby about this?

Answer 1

By no means. It is a 50/50 deal. Marriage is not a one way street. Why don't you just tell him that it is only fair he cook for you, or at least start it and you can finish it when you arrive.

Answer 2

Many women are dealing with this issue.


I personally feel that it depends on how much each of you are contributing to the family expenses. If your husband is paying the bills or "brings home the bacon" then you should fry it.

If you all are splitting bills--a role traditionally left to the man of the house-- then you should be splitting the roles traditionally left to the female, such as cooking, cleaning, and child-rearing.

If you get to keep your paycheck all to yourself, (which I highly doubt) then you should use a little to take care of the meal expenses (even if that means ordering in most of the week and cooking heavy meals on weekends). I used to cook food (on Sundays) and freeze it for later in the week.

I hope this helps and perhaps you should read up on the topic. And then have a serious conversation with your husband. There are plenty of books out there on the overworked mothers of this generation (those working full time and then coming home to do all the traditional motherly duties.)

Answer 3

No your not being a baby. Marriage is a WE, BOTH, US deal. Marriage is not a "I marry you and now your job is to clean and cook" relationship. Your husband has to understand that you've had a long day. If at times that he gets home earlier than you well I would think that he'd at least start on cleaning up or making dinner, give you a chance to relax for a while then if he really really REALLY needs help either offer your services after your well relaxed to help out or he may have already finished by the time you have relaxed.
To put it plainly both of you need to relax or make a date to go out an eat or order in and enjoy each other's company.

Answer 4

There are lot of good suggestion here around, but one thing which needs to be pondered that we live in what ever century and a woman if becomes a President of a nation, or a Company still Kitchen is her domain,kingdom or entity.
Now,in case both partners are working the Home works needs to be divided especially kitchen works.Most of the males don't know cooking but they are best assistant.And food cooked together is recipe of with love hence healthy and even if you are too tired when both shares it becomes one way of enjoyment like we go for a walk,purchasing or movie.Afterall we toil around for bread meal of 2 time, why run away from it.
But,husband need to understand this,so who knows better than a wife to cajole or with stiffness to help.
Make him understand, don't feel burdened and enjoy life.

Answer 5

if I am too tired to cook, I get take out and bring it home. You shouldn't be expected to cook all the time. One thing that my Mom put in as a rule cause she got tired of cooking and then doing the dishes after every meal was that if you ate the dinner that you didn't cook, you cleaned up. That changed things alot because when we were young we'd wanna go out so we'd cook, and give my Mom a bit of a night off from not cooking, you know? This might give him a little more incentive to get up off his *** and do his share. It should be a treat that you cook for him, not a regualr chore! He needs to understand where you are coming from, talk it out, and see what ideas both of you come up with...maybe take turns between each of you cooking and take out

Answer 6

No you're not. It's give and take. If you are working just as hard, and you are assisting in paying the bills just like he is, then he can assist with the cooking. He's the one being the baby.

Try this: when you get home, cook yourself a quick small but delicious meal. And, when he asks where his is, say, "I guess still in the refrigerator waiting for you to cook it." He'll get the point. If HE doesn't have to cook, why should you?

Answer 7

Ummm, make no sense what he doing right now. if my wife is cooking great if not then She will ask me to cook and I do it too until she ready to cook 3 days 10 days whenever it best. that what marriage about to work out together and yeah see no plm for you to sit down and drink your beer watch t.v. why can't your husband get up and start cooking if he don't know how to cook it time that he need to learn. Try not cook for 2 weeks and see what he has to do or say? Might go to fast food or he might complain allllll night to you... see Tell him it time for you to learn to cook... I understand that I am the woman in the house didn't me I have to cook I work and come home and so you and So, I think we need to learn to share cooking.

I love doing cooking for my wife and kids and I enjoy it alot so is my wife. It not too much pressure on her or me.

hope this helps?

Answer 8

Since your husband wants hot meals when he gets home try cooking varies meals and freezing them so when he comes home all he has to do is heat them up and there you can tell him you cooked him a meal everyday and you can have your beer and sit in front of the t.v for a while.

Answer 9

Marriage shouldn't be about rules and who-does-what. If he's home first then why on earth won't he start dinner? Or, if you leave later than he does, why don't you take something out to thaw or start something in the crock pot? That's what WE did.

Rather than making it about who HAS to do what, why not make it about the TEAM the two of you are supposed to be. Talk about it together (preferably NOT at dinner time) and work out a way that will work for both of you.

There are no jobs that have to be done by you just because you're the "wife" -- work it out together before it becomes such a huge issue that you're working separately!

Answer 10

If you are both working outside the home, then you should share the housework. I deal with this same situation a lot... unfortunately, I am a bit stubborn and childish so I just refuse to cook. We end up eating out a lot. My hubby and I tried actually writing out a list of chores and who is responsible (we even had days that we did them) that worked for a little while. What if you just divided it up, Mon. Wed Fri you cook, Tue, thur, sat he cooks and you go out sundays?

Or he could start dinner, and you finish it up when you get home.

Answer 11

no you have every right to relax before cooking anything for dinner. I'm sure he relaxes when he comes home also before doing anything. their is no reason why he can't cook dinner also, you both have full times jobs. you should both take turns cooking. or even set a day when you both come home from work and just go out to eat that way you both can relax and neither one of you have to cook. it should be 100% both ways. this is 2006. when everyone helps out. not just one person.