Where is love when you live in a world of msery? Too many dead ends and no one to help me.?

Question

I'm 31 and I feel am facing my mid life crisis even though I really don't know what that is or if it even exist. I've had deaths and breakups and an unhappy marriage and ever time I go to fix one of them, something else has to happen. I'm running into dead ends and no way out. I'm sick of failing myself and I have no one to talk to about any of it and I'm not paying someone to talk about it. I just need to find a way to fix it and needed some advice. The onlly happiness is my life at the moment is that I have the best 2 sons in the world but I want happiness for myself as well. I'm really confused so someone please offer some good suggestions. Thanks.

Answer 1

focus on the positives..out of all the heartache and pains u've experienced thru ur life, it is GREAT that u can see and appreciate your sons. make sure they know that you love them and think well of the, so that they don't feel ur past hurts ur ability to love them. also, continue to work, HARD, on yourself. build confidence in urself, by studying new things, keeping up on ur appearance, work out, picking up hobbies...FEEL GOOD about yourself. once u have confidence in urself and ur abilities, u can take the bad with the good. stop blaming yourself or feeling sorry for urself..the past is the past, and USE it to make yourself a better person. u have gone thru much more than someone else may have gone thru, and therefore u are 1) more knowledgable about life, and 2) are that much stronger. as long as u can accept ur past "failures", and look forward to all the future GOOD u can do, (for ur sons, for urself, for future family, etc), u can't help but think positively and optimistically. stop dwelling on the past, it does no good and makes u feel bad about urself. time still goes forward, so u might as well do it in a positive way. if u are religious at all, please read Romans 5-8.. it really helped me put into perspective all the past hurts, to put them away and LET THEM HELP YOU become a stronger person in the future. take care

Answer 2

Except if you are an atheist. Do find time to pray, alone, in church of your religion, where you will be alone. Let your heart cry out loud. If you are a christian better talk as if in confession, to your priest or pastor, let your burdens fell through you. Think only of loving. To love and not be loved. To give rather than to receive. At 31 you are still very young, I bet every person has it and passes it what you call mid life crisis only in different ways. In any game anyway is not in the winning but how you played the game, isn't it. Your 2 sons is a very very great inspiration. Be thankful of them. Strive not for you but for them and their happiness, eventually love, joy and happiness will flow into you. Good luck and GOD Bless.

Answer 3

Well u just stated that u have 3 things that u are happy with and about so u need to put all ur energy and focus into those things, if u focus on the bad thats all u see and even if it keeps popping up think of all that u have been thru as obstacles and look at where u are now....u have come quite a ways...if ur spiritual think of it as God preparing a warrior he has put u thru trials and tribulations thus far u have not failed...keep ur head up .... I'm in my early 20's and my friends and I have been thru some serious situations but I think the one main thing we have in common is knowing it's true WHAT DOES NOT KILL U ONLY MAKES U STRONGER.....

Answer 4

In our lives, all of us have hit some brick walls, doing 80 miles an hour at the time, it seems. Mine happened in my forties, for me. Midlife crisis,divorce, death of a son, death of both parents, and the list goes on......but the fact that I am answering this question is living proof that life does indeed , go on! Not only does it go on, but trust me, it gets better and better. In a year or two, you are going to be so happy. You can't imagine the joy you'll have! Trust me on this one....it WILL get better!!

Answer 5

There's no magic fixer to ths. Time, prayer, and time spent alone analyzing the whole aspect of what has happened helps to soften the harshness of the realities of life...god bless.....