You know you're getting old when?

Answer 1

When you start sleeping with Ben Gay, And wake up with Arthur Ridious. And the only mail you get is from AARP and SS

Answer 2

You're not carded for alcohol or entering a club anymore
You yawn and check the time when you're at the club (still early)
You look and feel like you're the oldest one there because you're body is covered with clothes
You look at a girl at the club and think to yourself...my daughter better not EVER......

Answer 3

You see your picture on a Smucker's label on The Today Show. Oh, no, that's when you ARE old. You are Getting old when the first thing you hear in the morning is the sound of your shoulders, knees, and hips popping.

Answer 4

your teeth sleep beside you on the dresser,
policemen (and women) and teachers look young,
the little girl next door now has a little girl of her own,
you find yourself teaching children and remembering that you taught their parents,
you start suffering from 'wotsits desease'... "Errr... wotsit I came in here for?",
you're scared to open the fridge door in case the little light highlights your wrinkles,
you find they keep moving the floor further away,
children stand up and offer you their seat,
you have to take off your surgical stockings and use your toes as well as your fingers to count how many great grandchildren you have,
you get a birthday card from the Queen.

Answer 5

your boobs drag...you yell at kids to get off of your lawn...you say when i was little whenever telling a story cause thats the only time you had anything exciting in your life.. your eyebrows and eye lashes are grey.. you start to wear big *** glasses...you cant run fast enough...you check out younger people (which is uber gross)...you need to wear a diaper...(obviously your not a baby at this time)...you yell at kids for no reason...

Answer 6

1 you bend down to pray and your knees start to crack
2 when you walk away from your car, go inside and forgot something in the car and can't remember where you parked
3 when the elderly walks faster than you sometimes
4. when you complain about body aches and pains more than the elderly

Answer 7

My mother told me you know you're getting older when policemen look young to you.
To which I would add:
You know you're middle aged when doctors look young to you.
You know you're really old when the president looks young to you.

Answer 8

When your preteen starts acting like you did and you start saying things like..

"And if your friends jumped off a cliff, would you?!"

"Don't you roll your eyes at me young lady!!"

I knew I was old when I started sounding like my mother and all the things she said to me in my youth made perfect sense.

Answer 9

*You don't get carded at the liquor store : (
*When staying out past 11:00 pm is "Wild & Crazy"
*You start any sentence with "Kids these days...."
*When bothering to shave your legs is "gettin' fancy" (women)
*When the total amount of hair in your ears and nose surpasses that left on your head. (men)

Answer 10

you tell the nurse, as you're checking your husband into emergency, that he was born in 1945, and she asks, as if to repeat what you were saying "1975?" because she just can't wrap her mind around a date as far back as 1945.