I have this friend who is a girl, i think she likes girls, i am straight and dont mind the fact she might be gay, but how do i ask her to tell me the truth, i mean she may be bisexual because she thinks she is pregnant, but i think she has had some run downs with some other girls at school, we have always been honest with eachother about stuff, but i think she is keeping a secret, how do i get her to be trusting in me?
2006-07-26 05:15:25 · 14 answers · asked by vampire_delux 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
dont ask her, why do you need to know? You know how embarrassing for you it would be if you asked her a question like that and she ended up being straight? That would insult her. Besides, if she is gay, she may be embarrassed about it, and may not want you or the whole world to know, so maybe thats also why she hasnt told you yet.
Good luck!
2006-07-26 05:20:11 · answer #1 · answered by Aimee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How should I approach (and support) a youth who I think may be gay? (from PFLAG)
The perception by a third party of someone else’s sexual orientation or gender identity is not always what it appears to be and to offer support for being “gay” to someone who is not gay or who is still trying to work out whether or not they are gay could be counter-productive. Unless the person has actually declared that they are “gay” we cannot know whether they are or not. I always recommend that people let it be known through their stance and aspect “that being gay is OK”. This can be achieved by a willingness to talk about topics such as gay marriage, gay rights, and a general sense of acceptance of things “gay”. This conveys the message to the person being perceived as gay that if they are gay it would be safe to let it be known without having to fear for the consequences. Obviously this is not an easy task and needs to be done with tact and diplomacy. It is seldom appropriate to ask the person, "Are you gay?", as they may well be frightened by the question. If you follow the tips above, and if the person feels secure and wants you to know, they will tell you in their own good time.
2006-07-26 07:09:17 · answer #2 · answered by MindStorm 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, ive been in ur situation before. the thing is, u cant get her to trust u. its either she does, or she doesn't. if u ask her whether she's gay or not, she'll be offended n things will start to gt awkward between the 2 of u. then it'll be harder for her to come clean. so, its better if u just give her some time. u can sorta like.. give her a hint. something like "i want u to know that u can trust me with anything".. those kinda stuff. or.. just to make the situation let awkward, when u see her eyeing another girl, just give an innocent compliment like "she's kinda cute". something like that. once she starts to notice that u have nothing against being gay or striaght, she'll trust u more.. n maybe she'll tell u. good luck. =)
2006-07-26 06:34:11 · answer #3 · answered by FO 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she and you are true friends it doesn't matter if she is gay or not, just ask her. =)
Now... are you just bi curious??? or possibly hiding something yourself??
Talking things over might help both of you =)
People cannot change what they feel inside, society forces that.
No one is threatened by a person with an alternative lifestyle.
So what is big deal if someone is gay or bi?? As long as 2 consenting adults =)
2006-07-26 05:24:42 · answer #4 · answered by wolfeex 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends on how DEEP the relationship is. If you are at the point where you talk about your sexual adventures/secrets or overall confidant status, I think you would feel comfortable asking her. Remember when you do, be supportive and don't judge her on it. Try to touch the gay subject, discuss it, and she might add her sexuality to the conversation. It happened to me!
2006-07-26 05:22:25 · answer #5 · answered by Kookoo Bananas 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ya know what this is the first non hate filled message ive seen in the gay section since i logged on.i actually felt quite sad that ive read some of the things.ive never heard such strong and agressive opinions in my life! australia seems to be the same too
2006-07-26 06:22:23 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Come right out and ask her. Tell her that you guys are friends and always will be. Ask her if she likes other girls and tell her that you are cool with it.
2006-07-26 06:32:26 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have no interest in exploring pleasures with her, dont ask. If you are curious at least, you can bring up the topic. Arent you a bit curious babe
2006-07-26 08:08:19 · answer #8 · answered by aprilx4u 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I fine the question "Are you gay" to be a very effective way to ask someone if they are gay.
2006-07-26 07:16:10 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't ask her. let her come out to you in her own time. I have a friend I guessed was gay 4 years before he told me. he just wasn't ready...
2006-07-26 05:18:20 · answer #10 · answered by coquinegra 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋