I made a mistake...?

Question

My wife has been gone for 3 days to her parents house in N.J. During summer vacation we always go to NJ. This year because I used up all my Vacation & sick days I was not able to go. One of her friends has already call me and invited me to hang out with her. Last night she came over (a little buzzed) and did a striptease for me. I could not resist and so we had sex. Should I tell my wife or just pretend it never happened??? Good answers please and this time not for the points.

Answer 1

Why in the world did you agree to go out with one of her friends? Did your wife know that her friend was asking you to hang out with her? If not, then maybe it was something that was bound to happen. You said the friend was a little buzzed, were you also a little buzzed? There is no excuse for this behavior. Your wife trusted you to stay home and be faithful to her. The first moment you were left alone without her, you cheated on her. How would you feel if you went away on business or something, and your friend kept calling your wife so she could hang out with him. I don't think you would have taken too kindly to that. You should have put the friend in her place from the beginning. You enjoyed what you did and now you are feeling guilty.

I would suggest you come clean. Tell your wife what happened, (that is if you never, ever plan on putting yourself in this situation again) This woman is her "so called" friend. That means that if she doesn't know what she did, she will continue viewing her as a friend and that is a terrible deception. And since this already happened once, what's to say it won't happen again. If you have a good relationship with your wife and you can talk about anything, start talking.

Answer 2

Brother have you ever heard the terminology that some things are better off never being said? Well you better not say a thing. First of all I am a man and I do understand. I've been there and done that, so I know and understand your dilemma.

But first of all off the record, you disrespected your wife by having sex in the house or apartment that the both of you share. That is a no no? if you had any idea this was going to happen, you should have gotten a room or something. All men know there intentions when it comes to women, so I believe you had an idea that this could happen. If your going to cheat do it out side of the house.

I don't think you should tell. If you want your marriage you should do your best to never let this secret leak out. She will never forgive you. She will also be crushed. You will never recover from this. Take it from me bro, you better not let her find out and threaten to harm the person who tries to tell.

You'll be okay, if you plan not to do it anymore, pray to God and ask him to forgive you, and get on with your life.

You'll be okay honestly. Slipping happens sometimes especially when you're not getting it the way you should at home. I've been there man, I know..

Don't tell!!!!!!

Answer 3

Well, the cat was away.Ya dirty little mouse.You need to talk to the stripping girl right away. Find out what she's going to do first.And hopefully there was nothing but a one timer on her mind.If she "loves you"" your screwed.However she may never say a word, she may be embarrassed about the whole thing.Or if your really lucky and she's hot and good in the sac.She may want to have a little something on the side, kind of picking up the slack a little when the wife ain't filling the bill.Look...she obviously had a thing for you to begin with, or she wouldn't have came over knowing your wife was gone.She knew what she was coming over for.But you need to find out her intentions.good luck and don't crack under pressure.I had to add to this after reading the others.Think about what would happen if you told her.More than likely she will leave, you will wreck the friendship and your relationship...guarenteed.If you don't say anything and neither does the girl...your in the clear.Say a few years down the road, she finds out? then you tell her it was a mistake and you didn't tell her because you didn't want to lose her over a stupid mistake.Tell her you don't deserve her, but don't want to live without her.That is ONLY if someone spills the beans.To me, cheating is like jerking off....it doesn't mean anything.Unless you want it too.

Answer 4

Wow, very faithful husband and you had sex with other woman. and you couldn't not resist? Dude, She will find out no matter what you do, Plan not to tell her she will find out from someone else if you don't give what other woman wants. umm If you plan to tell your wife you did that she will divorce you sooooooo bad and you going to lose everything.

Look at me my wife and kids gone for 1 week won't be back until sunday and if woman come want to have sex I tell them no, becasue I in so much in love iwth my wife and I married my wife becasue she the only person I will have sex with. That Not that damn hard to do that. I told my wife what if woman tease me and doing striptease and then she was naked and I so damn weak and I did it anway and Plan to tell you or not. what would you do? she said Don't give a damn if you feel weak and you had sex with that woman it over done finished history. You will wondering why did I get married the first place???? Wow, she sure did explain to me CLEAR!!!!!

So, now I am glad I talk to her. and knowing that I will not do it. I told her if naked I can look at her and say wow thanks free Looks and No charge, and Hold call my wife on cellur phone and telling her that woman naked in my house wow but free look, and don't touch or anything. I though she is my friend and I am telling you right now why so woman here can't say I did have sex or rape. here she is talk to her. See that how I do it right a way fast call my wife. why I told her she will be the first person to know before anyone tell even my kids.

So you are so SCREWED DUDE!!! and yes it about POINTS and I GOT 2 points for answer your question. I am being stright and honest with you man. Also, you just lost 10 points and even worst losing your wife. (Laughing so hard right now) You should though about it... so next time you ever get married again you will think twice.

Good luck man!!! (LOL)

Answer 5

With friends like that - who needs enemies? If you don't tell her - rest assured her friend will. She has probably already told a number of other people. I am so sick of hearing men make the excuse "I couldn't resist". Unless someone was holding a gun to your head ( and under those circumstances i doubt you could perform anyway!) - you had a choice.
You should confess. Then , I do hope she has the self esteem to leave you. Men who cheat do not get my sympathy. You have NO idea how hurtful that is to the partner. Even if she stays with you - she will never truly forgive you and your relationship will never be the same. I do hope the girl was worth it. In one single night you changed your whole life!
Probably not the answer you wanted - but a truthful one.

Answer 6

Well here is the situation if you decide to not tell her- her friend eventually will. She will by mistake slip up or simply send some signal her way that she had you. Your wife will be confronting you. What will you say then?

Or you tell her and guess what expect a blowout fight or divorce. Or separation. Or maybe she will listen and give things one more try. But you have broken trust. The unconditional trust you have broken now has to be earned. She will always be looking over her shoulders and you will need help.

Either way she will find out. Listen to me, just tell her, and deal with the consequences. You knew what you did and now you did it and feel guilty. It will be worse if you act like nothing happened.

Good Luck

K

Answer 7

i seriously think you should tell her. if you are so worried about it i guess you don't have an open relationship, right? if you had it wouldn't be a problem. i would not use the alcohol as an excuse it never is it just makes you do things easier that you anyway would do. i for myself actually don't see a problem in having sex with people other than your partner but i know monogamous people go crazy about such things. still if she loves you and you love her and tell her about it honestly she should understand, everyone can be tempted. and by being honest and worrying you show her how important she is for you, no matter what you did with anyone else.. that was just sex, she is the one in your heart... and if she feels the same for you it should not be a problem. i just talk from my own experience, i am never bodily faithful and in general always have polyamorous relationships... i never had problems because i have always been honest.. people appreciate that. and the true feelings for each other, the affection and love i would not see why one should throw that away just because of something meaningless like sex. good luck and always go for honesty!!!

Answer 8

You really are going to have to confess what you did. You may or may not be able to live with yourself after what you did but you will eventually get caught. Her friend may fess up before you so who do you want your wife to hear it from first? You made the choice to have sex with this woman no matter how tempting it was and now you have to face the consequences. If it had been the other way around and your wife cheated on you, what would you have expected from her? The longer you wait to tell the worse it will get in every way.

Answer 9

You made one mistake by cheating. Don't make a second,by blabbing it to your bride and expect anything buy rejection . In her shoes, I'd leave you -- now, this instant, on the spot when you told me. I'd be crushed, but I'd be outa there........ Betrayal is the worst cut of all, the trust would be gone. So, advise???? Shut the hell up and live with the guilt...... You will gain absolutely nothing by the big confession but her disgust. Do you love her???? Then this is a little secret you share with no one. And you treat your wife like a queen. Unloading your big confession will get you nowhere. In this case, honesty is not the best policy -- a future of being a great husband is......

Answer 10

WOW! OK, well I believe that mistakes happen. I would leave my husband if he cheated but I can understand that we are all just human. SO, if you are truly sorry and can live with yourself then just keep it to yourself. Don't tell her to make YOU feel better. You are running the risk of her finding out through her "friend". Does her "friend" expect more? Are you going to be seeing her on a permanent basis? If so then just tell her and leave. If you are really going to stick around and love her then telling her will only hurt her in the long run. This is just my opinion. Like I said, I would not give my husband a second chance.