I understand if they split up, but some people think illegitimate children are okay, and have many refusing marriage with the same partner who fathered all children.
I say nothing against the child born from that. But does that not look bad on the mother of the children?
I have a cousin who has a son and daughter with the same man, whom she has known for years, and I think it shows a lack of dignity and self-resect that she has not married him (despite him asking).
2006-07-26 00:42:10 · 22 answers · asked by Misha 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
When you have children, marriage is the best protection you can have, both for them and for you. It saves a lot of worry and stress in the event of the unthinkable (the death of one partner). I don't think it's a question of morality but of sheer self-protection.
2006-07-26 00:46:31 · answer #1 · answered by Roxy 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I am an unmarried mother of 2 children and have been with there father for the past 11 years.
We have thought about getting married, the main reason we haven't
is the cost.
Another is we are happy just the way we are we do not need a piece of paper to prove our love for each other or our children.
2006-07-26 00:49:46 · answer #2 · answered by MoJoJoJo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The 1989 Children Act states that married parents have equal responsibility for children. In cohabitating relationships the mother has responsibility but the father can have a say but will need a piece of paper from a solicitor confirming this.
So, they don't need to get married after all!
2006-07-26 23:09:59 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Many people today avoid getting married because the have no religious beliefs, so why form a covenant with a God that you don't believe in. In order to get married, at least in the USA, you have to register at the courthouse, etc. For this reason many people feel that a marriage license is just another way for the government to keep its nose in their business. Others refuse marriage because they can't admit their true feelings. I met a couple 2 years ago in Clovis, New Mexico who have been together for 17 years, they have 3 children and he has never told her that he loves her... weird huh???
2006-07-26 01:30:58 · answer #4 · answered by J P 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well not everyone is marriage material. Marriage is no longer what it use to represent. Today it's about money and the expensive dress/festivities. People are so rapped up in "self" that divorce is no big deal.
I say if she's happy livining and raising her children unmarried then so be it. The kids still have an active Father in their life and that is what's important -- not a piece of paper.
2006-07-26 00:50:05 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why marry when things are working just fine the way they are? I know a few people who have been together for years and decide to tie the knot and for some reason, once there is that piece of paper between them, everything goes AWOL.
Leave your cousin and her bloke in peace and just be thankful that they are one of the few couples with kids that are still together in their hearts, sod the piece of paper.
As for lack of dignity and self- respect - that was a joke right?
2006-07-26 00:52:55 · answer #6 · answered by Moi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who defines what constitutes marriage?
Is a a ritual to be done in a religious building? If so many people do that and have no faith in a God at all they just want the "package".
Is it a contract between two people? If so to be enforceable it has to have the backing of law. That can be done by a ritual/ceremony in a civic building or by simply drawing up an agreement.
Is it two people commiting themselves to each other (before God if they believe) if so that is best done in the heart and in truth.
2006-07-26 00:55:52 · answer #7 · answered by phil_the_sane 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people cant afford to get married (the average wedding costs £17,000)
Some people that aren't religious feel that there is no need to get married.
Some couples that are of mixed religion or race find it difficult to get support and the wedding process e.g no family support and no priest/vicars that will agree to do it!
I don't understand why you think your cousin has no respect or dignity for herself just coz shes not getting married to her partner!!!!!????
It's a personal choice and I think it's quite old fashioned to feel that just because you have a child with someone that you have to marry them!
2006-07-26 00:51:14 · answer #8 · answered by carly s 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
some people have seen a couple happy for ages and then they get married and for some strange reason it all goes wrong so they don't want that to happen but there is all so the saying that if it is not broken why try to fix it she maybe feels comfortable with this as although they are together they are not tied as such as this can scare some people so i think it is fine it is only societies perception of what should happen so they should be able to do what they are happy with
2006-07-26 00:55:31 · answer #9 · answered by RJ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No one should get married just because they have a child together. If they are not in love then the marriage would never work out. Wouldn't that be a worse situation for a child?
2006-07-26 00:52:05 · answer #10 · answered by zerospacegurl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your opinion is quiet rude actually. I have been with my partner for 10 years, and we have 2 children together. We own our own home, have great holidays and our kids want for nothing. My kids do not feel any different towards us because we are not married. We will be together for as long as were together, and no piece of paper would ever change that. Anyway, who made you judge and jury???
2006-07-26 00:48:48 · answer #11 · answered by OLLIE_WOLLIE 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋