Why newly weds always fight and quarrel in their first years of marriage? and what's the solution for that?

Answer 1

Compromising is the cure....
Both try to understand each other....
& why there is quarrel has an answer.
Actually, they both think they are equal. So they want the equal share. & hence they fight for it.
The wives don't respect their husbands & vice versa.
They both think that their life partners are their property.

Unlike this, in muslims, there is a head of the family; the man. Others respect him. Be it his children or his own wife or anyone else...
The wife has the biggest share AFTER her husband.
so she is at a bit lower level.
So she respects her husband.
& so there is no fight.

However this trend is coming to an end due to influence of the western society where every one is EQUAL

Don't you think why there is Jesus???
& not a lady???
Do you know that muslims have nearly 1,24,000 prophets & none of them is a woman. u know why???
Because the Man is more powerfull, Emotionally & physically. He can handle situations better than woman.
God has made Man better. Woman must respect him.

Don't u think why there is need of a president/priminster or head of the state to a country??
It is to represent the country to others & to run the country.
& so all others must respect the head of the country.
Because without a head of a country, the contry will not progress further.
& think, everyone in the public tries to be the head, what can happen???
there is a war!..
Similarly a couple must not fight. & respect each other & run family effectively.
U get my point???

Answer 2

Not every newlywed does that. My husband and I have maybe fought twice since we got married 11 months ago. Most of the time when we argue we don't raise our voices to be heard. We just talk through it and tell each other how we are feeling. Part of that is the fact that we completed pre marrital councling also. And a requirement for that was to spend a weekend at a retreat where we learned how not to fight but to talk about what is going on and what bothers us. Most people do not do that pre marital stuff. Maybe the best thing to do if you belong to a church is to join one if not and see if they have any retreats you two can do. I think that it is a fun time the two of you can have and it will help.

Answer 3

I agree with all the answers, Also to add my opinion after a couple failed marriages,
I think couples think if they really love each other, and were ready for the plunge, it will take care of itself, and i know this is not so,,
Marriage and the relationships with each other take work for the rest of your life ,, if you can realize you just began the "school of marriage" AND you both are in kindegarden,, and then the next step is to learn what makes relationships work, the initial romantic love got you to the alter, but the real challenge is to be glad you are together,

Ask elderly couples who stayed together and still "like" each other, they will all say almost the same thing, it is work,,give and take, and they did not always have great tiimes, but with didication to the marriage, and respect for each other, and be willing to learn, and understand the needs of each other, and SACRAFICE, at times their own needs, you may make it to the finish line,
Marriage is for the strong,,, quarrels will be necessary to learn, it is how you treat one another during and after them.

besides sex education i think all schools should teach about relationships, marriage and the real life that goes with it,

Answer 4

Well frankly speaking why they always fight , it is because one good reason. Being love birds, everything is perfect. but after marriage either party dint treat them as before.
When courting, waiting, calling and being together is all precious. After marriage we just forget about it and take life as it is,
For example before marriage, sorry, welcome is all an automatic words which comes out. After marriage u dint even use that.
Try to be romantic, to make a marriage keep on going both party gotta clap, not one.
Both gotta do something to show love. maybe making a simple card , drawing or at least cook his/her spacial food. Each month once.
Because if u kept on thinking that u made a wrong decision, then u will keep on changing Ur marriage.

Answer 5

Their ego hurts as they relay don't know and understand each other properly in the first year. When they become familiar to each other, they try to hon our each others feelings and it their quarreling goes away. To stop such situation, They should understand each other feeling and habits. People in love quarrel more, after marriage, as they were in love and what they found good during love in each other, was relay his/her bad habit and don't like after marriage.

Answer 6

In the first years of marriage people are only just getting to know each other properly. When they were dating before getting married he was never grumpy in the morning and she never picked her nose! All sorts of minor irritations will surface, after a few years they will have gotten used to each other.

Answer 7

i think because the newlyweds are still adjusting to their new situation in life. both of them would try to assert themselves you see, and fighting for what they think is right is a way of asserting themselves. i feel that quarreling could be lessened by compromising. the husband cant always have things his way, and that also goes for the wife. :)

Answer 8

fighting is just a way of life if there werent any fights then the two of you would be exactly alike and what kind of relationship would that be fighting builds charecter to your marrige my hunny and i have had our fair share of fights and weve been married for 2 1/2 yrs there really is no solution for it just try to be as honest as you possibly can be good luck

Answer 9

just shows how ill-prepared for marriage they were in the first place
people 'fall in love' and think that the feeling will last forever - reality soon proves otherwise
the solution is not to get married unless you are really sure you know yourself and your partner and vice versa

Answer 10

Thats just life. Don't go to bed angry. Learn to be considerate, apologetic, forgiving, and effectively communicate your thoughts and provide simple solutions. Keep it simple! Especially you ladies, keep it simple for us guys!