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i walk into a room with black roses on the side
theres a mirror at the end and i start to walk
i walk and feel like crying hear voices screaming why i did such a thing, i keep on walking i cant get to the mirror and somehow i feel passsionate about what im going 2 see, someone pulls my legs, i feel scratches on my knee for someone is not letting me move on, the window opens and the wind shouts how is hould not see whats oon that mirror, i look at the floor and see footsteps full of blood, im being chocked and my hair is being pulled, screaming out of my head i cant take the pain, why wont they let me see the mirror, i suffer but i wont stop, i m dying to know what happens , i hear painfull sounds and im finally on front of the mirror, my fears goes away, my pain stops and i hear nothing but silence , i look in the mirror, theres an innocent girl looking at me who doesnt want 2 see her true self, i wake up and i breath

2006-07-25 18:01:42 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music Polls & Surveys

9 answers

I like it, If you want to read some peer poetry I have dozens.

2006-07-25 18:09:00 · answer #1 · answered by Brandon 3 · 1 3

That piece is properly written and, sure, it made me cry, too. despite if it reads extra like a narrative than a poem. regrettably, one among those ending happens a techniques too oftentimes. right here is yet another ending, an excerpt from my poem, thank you Ma, which I wrote from my rescue canines's attitude. You heard my voice that Autumn day asserting, * please be variety,* take me away. * This cage is stressful and chilly and moist. * My time has come, * oh please, no longer yet. * i'm older than the papers say, * my physique's stiff, my muzzle's gray, * yet i will love you besides. ** What excitement, what relaxing, what issues we do. * i exchange into suitable to assume you. * At six i've got had a sparkling beginning up, * i've got even discovered the excitement of swimming! * thank you, Ma, for my new residing house, * for by no ability lower back will i could desire to roam. Bonnie spent 7 marvelous years with me and her plenty youthful maximum suitable buddy Teddy, my Golden Retriever. notwithstanding she kicked the bucket 2 years in the past at age 13, i'm going to constantly keep in mind the excitement and gratitude she expressed to me along with her eyes. final year I rescued an quite elderly (age 12) Malamute go, who's enjoying off leash walks in the woods, a variety of of interest, extreme high quality nutrition, and new friendships with Teddy, my cats, chickens and a horse. those persons who love animals could make a distinction, one existence at a time. undertake an older canines or cat out of your community defend.

2016-10-08 08:07:57 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

Never seen
Never afraid
Lets himself down
Rains on his own parade
Holds beauty that close
Only to watch it leave
My thoughts overdose
My heart wants to breathe
Love hides from me
Cupid missed his shot
I was never seen
What does forever mean
Like love it becomes scarce
Never felt but it tears
Still not changing the scene

2006-07-25 18:12:25 · answer #3 · answered by Thin King 3 · 0 0

Thats some excellent work. You should take it to a vanity press and have it published. Seriously.

2006-07-25 18:06:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

*wipes tears from eyes* That was so beautiful, yet sad. Good poem. Did you write this? It's very well detailed;). BTW...nice poem Burkey.

2006-07-25 18:07:15 · answer #5 · answered by The truth is all around you... 2 · 0 0

that isn'ta poem. poems have stanzas, and some sense of rhythm, or at least some kind of verse, not just thoughts jumbled up on a page.

2006-07-25 18:06:00 · answer #6 · answered by judy_r8 6 · 0 0

quite an effort. well done.

2006-07-25 18:15:57 · answer #7 · answered by will 4 · 0 0

it's good

2006-07-25 18:07:16 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

its really good

2006-07-25 18:05:02 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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