I've 2 boys aged 5 and 10 respectively. I always tell them to love each other, take care of each other..... however whenever they're together, they will quarrel with each other......
Then both will complain to me what did the other party did to him. I tried to be the mediator countless of times over the years and I'm really stressed out. They just complained about each other, esp the young one. I know sometimes the younger son is the culprit who started everything. I've talked to them the other day, now they forgot and started everything again.
What should I do? Pls help me.....I'm really stressed out and sick of them at times when they got too much....I'm a stay at home mum and don't have many friends. I don't have gd relationships with my mother and siblings as they're a bunch of difficult and unreasonable people.
I hate my mum-in-law/my husband's family as they weren't nice to me in the past. I'm miserable......
2006-07-25 16:41:01 · 5 answers · asked by Maggie 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Thank you to all of you for your wonderful help and advice - irregardless they are applicable to me or not.
I'm appreciative of your time and advice. May you be well and happy!
2006-07-27 17:13:34 · update #1
Hi there. I would seriously consider family counseling. Nothing wrong with getting support and guidance on this. Tell your boys how you feel about their constant bickering and get your husband involved. This is not just YOUR problem - it's his too! It doesn't matter if you're a stay at home mom or not - the dad needs to be involved. If he's not, then that could be part of the reason why the boys are always fighting. It's normal to have some quarreling but there is a limit. Get some counseling and you'll all feel better. Plus, don't forget to take some time out for you because if you don't, then you won't be prepared to handle to challenges so take some quiet time for you and you only!
Be sure to shop around for a good family therapist just as you would a dentist or a doctor.
Best to you!
2006-07-25 17:17:01 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would have to say get them involved in sports or music. Something to get them away from each other and at the same time yourself. There is nothing wrong with wanting some down time for you. Every human needs it to survive. Another thing to consider some help. Like a parenting coach, not to say you are a bad mom or nothing, but I had one growning she came over and helped my single dad with all three of us girls, 2, 4, and 5 at the time. That is the best advice I can give you.
2006-07-25 16:57:56 · answer #2 · answered by racer_chic_04 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There were 4 of us: I guess we used to drive our mom crazy too. We'd argue in the car, in the house -- everywhere. She even carried a stick in the car that she threatened to reach over and hit us with if we didn't "Shut up." One day after hearing her scold us for what seemed to be the 1,000 time, it dawned on me that our constant bickering really bothered my mother. I remember being surprised over that revelation because as far as we were concerned, we were just bored and passing time together when we argued. We all get along very well as adults and do love one another.
Can you take them to the playground where they can play with other kids and you can sit and talk with other mothers or grandmothers? If you can, put the past differences aside and try to get to know your relatives. It would be better for you and the children to get some support.
2006-07-25 18:47:22 · answer #3 · answered by Lynda 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this finished subject is screwed up and confusing. Your husband sounds like he wasn't waiting for marriage interior the 1st place. Who could advise such an ascenine ingredient?! i think of that the subject got here once you caught thoughts and now he's upset. He reported this. He opened that door. you rather could have not completed this. i think of that your husband probable has somebody else onthe component. Leaving you and/or telling you to get together with his chum is to alleviate him of his guilt and makes it less complicated for him to declare properly you probably did IT additionally. Dont fall for it. Pray approximately it and get help
2016-11-03 00:28:25 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey! u r telling my story! the one and only difference is the gender. i've got 2 daughters who fight almost everytime and hug sometimes ! i think i can benefit from the answers u get! if i can give u any advice,it's just that u should involve your hubby and not suffer alone!
2006-07-25 16:57:05 · answer #5 · answered by rajeshwari 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋