I met a guy who was married for over 20 years but left his wife because she ran up the credit cards and stuff. I can understand him not being happy about it but isn't marriage supposed to be forever? He married for better or worse and by what he told me, she was pretty upset when he left her. He ended up giving her eveything anyway and ended up with all the bills to pay so I don't know what he got out of getting divorced. He doesn't seem to have anything to this day despite his income as I presume he is still paying off huge debts (he has only been divorce a couple years). I think he would have been better off staying with her because he still has to pay the bills but lost everything. He deserves it for leaving her, but I don't see what he thinks he got out of it and breaking his marriage vowels. I don't know If I even want to consider continuing to see a guy like this. I had a bad marriage but didn't leave my husband.
2006-07-25 13:59:29 · 14 answers · asked by reallyfedup 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
marriage is supposed to be forever.to me even if he cheated i would stick by him.to death do you part for me.i wish i could find a man who felt the same
2006-07-25 14:17:52 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he felt betrayed but what she has done. I work at a bank and I see women coming in to get loans to payoff their debts so the husbands son't find out. Then they just rack up the bills some more. Plus I live by a gambling boat and that causes problems too. Maybe she was in a situation like this. Maybe it had been going on for a while. Maybe this isn't what he wanted in his marriage. I only hope they had tried to resolve the issue long before he ran to a divorce lawyer.
2006-07-25 21:11:22 · answer #2 · answered by ?Shannan? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she got everything then she should pay for it. Why should he pay for something that he does not have access to any more. A child is different. But for credit cards. Phone the cc company and stop all cards. Then put a notice is the paper saying that he will no longer be responsible for any bills incurred by her as of the date of the divorce. If she wants, she pays.
All he pays for is the support for the children, if any and that he can set up a trust fund for and be the only signer.
2006-07-25 22:20:18 · answer #3 · answered by twentyeight7 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It takes 2 hands to clap. A marriage is a commitment made between 2 persons brought together by fate. As a husband, he should pay for the expenses incurred by the wife, unless he finds her a compulsive spender and divorce her based on unreasonable behavior.
Have a talk with him and find out what is the actual reason for him leaving her.
2006-07-25 21:15:07 · answer #4 · answered by hunnylashes 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A Marriage is a mutual agreement by the vows you take.... it was never designed to be one-way street. Two people have to say vows and make promises to each other. When people run up credit like that, it sounds like there is a problem that goes way deeper than the money. I'm sure they worked on it - talked about it and it could be that she refused to get help - and did not hold up her end of their promise to each other. You have to look carefully at relationships. It is NOT a marriage when people stay with each other till "the bitter end, hating, fighting, etc". I don't mean you should just walk away from anything - but..... you have to make sure your partner WANTS to work on the marriage as much as you and love is the foundation of the marriage - it is a recriprocal agreement. If one party breaks the agreement, it is no longer a marriage if the partner calls his/her bluff. It's always best to forgive - but you have to know when to stop hitting your head against a brick wall. I don't think God (through man's law) ever meant for people to stay married for 75 years of abuse, being beat up, etc...... I don't have much respect for people who don't respect themselves. I've never heard people say - we're getting married and promise to split up if we don't get along.
2006-07-25 21:09:34 · answer #5 · answered by longhats 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's marriage "vows" not "vowels".
I think you're too judgmental. The real issue is not why he divorced his wife, but rather how do the two of you get along and how does he treat you.
Maybe you're worried about how he'd react to your credit card debts and your own spending? Then you will need to talk to him at some point about those things.
2006-07-26 12:17:13 · answer #6 · answered by AnOrdinaryGuy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is very similar to my husbands ex wife.. she put them in hock twice.. He had his own business & her excessive spending ruin his business.. After the first time she promised to do better but it happened again.. My husband had to pay all her debts to keep his good credit.. he also gave her everything.. She did not care about their home, the bills, his business, employees, their kids, or their marriage.. just her spending.. well she lost her meal ticket... now she has to take care of herself.. she blames my husband.. oh well as I see she ruined the marriage.. Divorce is the right thing...
2006-07-25 23:53:06 · answer #7 · answered by cinsaint1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As my brother says "it is cheaper to keep her" haha.. but in all seriousness, it wasnt about the money, other things were happening. The money thing was just the final straw and a way to escape fault free. There are always 2 involved in a divorce. Why was she spending like that? Two sides to all stories, and unless you know both sides first hand, that question cannot be answered.
2006-07-25 21:25:08 · answer #8 · answered by tootsie45414 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No he wasn't right to divorce her because when you married it is for better or worse.
2006-07-25 21:10:36 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It would have been right if he would have divorced her and made her pay her own bills.
2006-07-25 21:02:53 · answer #10 · answered by heidielizabeth69 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋