bcz i think it was my fault the only reason my mom got married to my dad was 4 me
2006-07-25 11:44:08 · 23 answers · asked by I luv Lindsey kaemmerer 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Ohhh, you sweet thing. You are feeling what most children feel when parents divorce...that somehow, you caused the split.
Adults have choices. And they take full responsibility for their actions. Even if it is, as you say, that you are the reason why they married in the first place...they still made the decision to marry.
The only thing you "caused" them, the only thing you brought into their lives, is love and joy. They might regret many things, but they will never, ever regret bringing you into this world.
I'm sorry that things didn't work out between them. That is their issue to deal with.
Believe me, you are the one GOOD thing that they can take from their relationship.
Divorce is never the child's fault. Ever. Divorce is the result of two adults inability to get along. Marriage is a wonderful thing, but it takes a lot of unselfishness. People have a hard time letting go of their own selfishness. They also find it easier to run away from problems rather than working them out and overcoming them.
You, my child, are a good thing. A true blessing to your parents.
Love and blessings to you. :)
2006-07-25 11:55:59 · answer #1 · answered by hope03 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
definite break up!! What she has completed is merely undeniable incorrect! Locking you out of the family individuals homestead, stealing your van, secretly taking you off the meals stamps os a clean sign that she doesnt love you. You do deserve extra proper so get that divorce and dont ever take her decrease back! Shoot you may take her to courtroom over the van as properly. merely pay toddler help and get a custody contract because of the fact she appears like the form of guy or woman that would use your daughter to make you mad And be attentive to that that's decrease than no circumstances your fault:)
2016-11-03 00:00:34 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Parents do not know how much it hurts the kids when they divorce. My parents divorced when I was two. I still remember all of the fighting. They say that it is impossible for people to remember before 5, but I do. Talk to your parents see if they actually have a say. Otherwise I would say you might want to try counseling. It is better than it sounds. It is not your fault. It is your parents. They made their own decisions. You didn't make it for them.
2006-07-25 11:57:59 · answer #3 · answered by Tiger 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No this isn't right and you are being unfair to yourself if you believe this. Adults have a choice in what they do. And a marriage or divorce is a choice that usually is a personal preference and in no way is because of someone else. You either love someone or you don't.
Please don't believe this. Talk to your mom about it and maybe she can help you understand it wasn't you and if by some chance it was that is on her. A child is no reason to make a life long commitment.
2006-07-25 11:49:52 · answer #4 · answered by sceptileptic 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NOOO!!!!!!!!!!!! Adults have so much more going on the kids can ever understand. There is a reason why your mom got pregnant with you and a reason why she picked your dad to do it. If the only reason your mom married your dad was because of you there were problems that have nothing to do with you a long time ago. Just be happy that they both love you.
2006-07-25 12:00:54 · answer #5 · answered by Suesan W 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It wasn't your fault. Your mom made her own choice. I hope nobody is trying to make you feel like it's your fault, because that is wrong. Your mom and dad are the adults and are responsible for their own decisions and mistakes. The children should never be made to feel like it was their fault. If you are feeling this way maybe you can find someone older that you like to confide in. Sounds like you could use someone like that to explain it to you and let you know that it was nothing you did.
2006-07-25 11:52:09 · answer #6 · answered by Vicm0322 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Divorces aren't caused by children. Plain and simple. Adults make the decision to divorce, and that decision is theirs. There isn't anyone else that is making that decision for them, and it's not anyone else's fault but the adults that it's happened. They made the mistakes, they are the ones that can't get along.
You shouldn't feel like a divorce was your fault, because it wasn't.
2006-07-25 11:49:51 · answer #7 · answered by yep_yep_2004 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
DEFINATELY NOT!!!!! I strongly disagree with playing the "blame game" when there has been a divorce. I have a lot of friends w/ kids and they are divorced and the kids blame one or the other. That is the wrong thing to let kids hear is how the marriage didn't work because of hubby or wife... especially to let the kid take the blame, whew! That's gotta be rough on the kid! Honey, NEVER NEVER blame yourself!!! Your parents got divorced because THEY weren't secure enough within their relationship to be able to work out the kinks. Either that or they just weren't meant to be together!!!!
2006-07-25 11:59:44 · answer #8 · answered by michelle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No decision your Mom made was your fault. Each individual has there own personal success and failures. When you fail a math test is it your Moms fault b/c she put you in that school? Of course not, its yours b/c you didn't study, you didn't do the work.
Marriage takes work, hard work and its not work that children are qualified to do. YOU had NO responsibility in what happened to your parents marriage. They were required to do the work, the "failure" if you want to call it that is theirs not yours!!
2006-07-25 11:54:26 · answer #9 · answered by SpecialK 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In no way shape or form. They are adults and they did it of sound mind. They may be better people now that they are apart. I'm sure both of them love you very much and you'll all be okay. If your mom didn't like your dad at some point you wouldn't be here.
2006-07-25 11:51:28 · answer #10 · answered by LJ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋