i am talking about my brother, we live in the same house, and neither one of us can move out anytime soon, i'm very relaxed and layed back, i hate arguing and it really takes alot to get me to yell, now my brother will get mad at every little thing, he is on depression meds, but refuses to take them, we argue at least once a day, and i'm just getting sick of it, i'm 21 and he is 25 so its not that were babies, i just don't know how to get him to relax, PLEASE HELP, BEFORE I PULL MY HAIR OUT!
LIKE today he got mad and i walked away, and he started to yell and told me no matter where i go the argument will be waiting for me. he argues with my mother to,and were both lost and have no idea what to do.
2006-07-25 11:23:29 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
I will pray for you...since your brother is sick...you might wanna think about meditating classes...or even taking some "YOU" time go out more...get a massage...what ever you have to do to stay relax...and no matter how much he yells out you always talk to him in a calm voice almost whispering that way he has no choice to calm down so he can here what you're saying...Good luck...
2006-07-25 11:28:34 · answer #1 · answered by All hail 2 the "Queen" 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off, any psychologist will tell you that you cannot control the reactions of others. You can *only* control your own reaction. Do not try to get your brother to relax. If you want change, the easiest way to go about it is to relax yourself.
When he starts an argument, even by stating things that are completely untrue, say non-combative things like, "That sounds uncomfortable, and I'm sorry." You can't be passive-aggressive and say sarcastic things like, "Oh I wish *my* life was perfect, too." You have to empathize a little bit.
Good luck. It's a very difficult thing, and getting along with someone combative takes practice and patience.
2006-07-25 11:30:32 · answer #2 · answered by Link Correon 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your mother might consider telling your brother that in order to continue to live in the house, he needs to take his medication. Agitation and anger can be symptoms of depression.
You can try disengaging when he argues with you. Tell him that you are really not interested in arguing. Tell him that you will discuss any real issues when the both of you are calm--at another time. This will give you a chance to escape for the time being and think about what you really need to respond to.
Your family might benefit from some counseling--try a low cost health clinic in your area or make an appointment with a professional.
2006-07-25 11:32:18 · answer #3 · answered by oceana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm... I was raised in a family that liked to argue... we did not get mad... we discussed a LOT of topics... and sometimes.. we would convince someone of one point of view in a topic.. then switch to the other side... just to examine all angles.
It is very hard to avoid arguing with someone that wants to argue all the time... but it can be done.... just say "I will not argue with you" and walk off.... every time.
2006-07-25 11:27:14 · answer #4 · answered by ♥Tom♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMGAWSH!!!!
I HAVE THE SAME PROBLEM TOO!
How weird is that?
um, i usually just ignore him, and if he yells at me i just listen to my ipod and when i get mad,i just write it down and express my anger to him but i never really give the letter 2 him. : /
2006-07-25 11:28:17 · answer #5 · answered by I ♥ Kurt Cobain 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't stay in the house, i mean only come in the house to sleep. or get a boy friend he mite ask you to move in with him.
2006-07-25 11:30:44 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to move plain and simple.
2006-07-25 11:30:53 · answer #7 · answered by kitkat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't. You will have to move out or be subjected to his abuse.
2006-07-25 11:27:09 · answer #8 · answered by alfredenuemann98195 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋