Am I in the wrong for not wanting to talk to a 1/2 sister I didnt know I had.?

Question

some one that is related to my "dads" side of the family. ( I would have to assume that this person that found me would be a 1/2 sister to me.) any how I have had no contact with any of them for 20 years. (I am now 24) and this girl started calling my family members to find me out. I finally called the number that she had left and just said I have no interest in her or my father or anybody dont contact me. I am just angry at the whole situation Why now? why bother? I remeber my father being an abusive guy. and I know there are 2 sides to every story but Why should I care?

any body thoughts comments or if you went through something similar? anything would help

Answer 1

This is NOT an Entertaining question, nor does it have anything to do with Music. So why on earth did you pick this category? Being kinda lazy aren't you???

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am I wrong for not wanting to talk to a familymember I didnt even know I had.?
Asked by natelinds - 0 answers - Psychology - 2 minutes ago - Open

Am I in the wrong for not wanting to talk to a 1/2 sister I didnt know I had.?
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Was I in the wrong for not wanting to talk to....?

Answer 2

ive been thru it, its not her fault because of your memories. she may not have anyother family. maybe she also remembers him as abusive guy. sometimes people dont contact others in this situation because of fear of rejection. why shoudnt you care? i felt the same as you do for alot of years, what i found is some people do change over time. dont expect it but it sometimes happens. you might find you have a lot in common with this girl, thats what happened in my case and i had 4 of them. you should give it a chance, youve got nothing to lose and everything to gain. i went on what id heard from others (family) and ended up hateing people i didnt even know. how rediculous is that? dont let something that happened 20 years ago ruin something that might be really good. wish you the best. been there done that.

Answer 3

I had exactly the same thing when I was 15, found out I had a half brother and half sister from my Dad's 1st marriage (the 1st marriage that I didn't even know about!). Have never spoken to my half sister because she didn't want to know (kinda where you're coming from), but I got in touch with my half brother and he looked more like me then I look like my parents! He's now one of my closest friends and I've had some amazing times and experiences with him that I would never have had if I hadn't bitten the bullet and met him.
Go for it m8 - you'll never know if you don't, and hey, if it doesn't work out, you don't have to meet her again. It's not her fault you were kept in the dark, which, let's face it, is the real reason you're angry - don't forget - I've been there ;-)

Carpe et diem my friend, carpe et diem.
Good luck with it....

Answer 4

I am 46 and the oldest of both my mother and father. Both remarried after their divorce. I didn't have any contact with my fathers side of the family for longer that you've been alive. My Grandmother died and I did very much love her and wanted to go to the funeral.my Father (her son) was there. It was a very strained time. we never reconciled but I did find some very much needed medical info. I did also get to meet the younger sister that I had never seen.. I think that she was scared of me and that was sad because now my father has died and it's just us now.. What happened in the past needs to stay there but for your own healing you have to forgive and move on. It did a world of good for me.

Answer 5

Well i have a 1/2 sister that i meet for the first time in a very long time about 9 years ago and wish i have never meet her because she blames everything on my dad everything to her is my dads falt so no i dont blame you if i where you i would run and run far away.....but on the other hand i would meet her at least once just to see what she is like and then run...good luck.

Answer 6

I say give her a chance before you dismiss her. Just because your are angry at your father doesn't mean you should punish her. She is NOT your father. She may have not known much about you or known about you at all. I did what you are doing for 2 years, now after getting to know them I realize it was just a selfish move for me to not have any contact with them. I regret waiting as long as I did to get to know them. As for the "why now" part, who cares, at least she's making an effort to get to know you.

Answer 7

Family is family, dont let your anger shatter the relationsip you can have with your sister or brother...be it 1/2 or not. They are still your family, and would like only to get to know you...so try to let down your anger and just meet them, get to know them a little. It could be the best thing you ever do!!!!

And I agree with above, it is not their fault that they were born!

Answer 8

I hope you keep an open mind about this. It isn't her fault that your dad was abusive. You need to let down those walls a little bit when you're ready, it would probably be good for both of you.

Answer 9

I have 5 half sisters and 3 half brothers and they are practically strangers to me. I grew up with some of them, and we're still strangers. You're not in the wrong. Just ignore them, and if they don't leave you alone, tell them to back off.

Good luck!

Answer 10

i come across that the silent treatment works wonders, fairly in case you have a tendency to be argumentative besides. Say your piece, then hush. do not say anymore. do not argue, do not whine. Stick it out for in spite of the shown fact that long it takes - might desire to take a pair of days. pretend like not something is misguided. this might throw her off stability, have faith it or not. permit her be the 1st one to talk - do not strengthen the argument you had. If she brings it up returned - you clam up returned.