well me and my girl were talking on the phone and she is 15 am 17 and she told me she wants a baby at 16 and a half but im not ready and evry time i try to talk to her face to face someone is always ther and she lives away from me so we dont see each other all the time what do i do ???????????????????
2006-07-25 09:20:30 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
i mean about talking to her
2006-07-25 09:23:46 · update #1
Dont have sex with her .......thats the best answer.
IF you do use YOUR OWN BOUGHT CONDOMS......she will set you up if she is serious.
IF she tells you she is on birth control STILL USE YOUR OWN CONDOMS.
Adults and children too at times always look at peer pressure that girls get from boys not realizing that its a two way street.......I feel for you shorty.......But dont let ONE girl at this YOUNG age RUIN your life.........
You seem like a smart guy you know what you dont want to do and its YOUR CHOICE if you have sex with her and are careless you knew you set yourself up for failure.......
Best of luck to you both.........she needs to see a counselor she probably has some underlying issues she isnt addressing or are supressed ..........You can try to help her BUT DONT have a child with her..........
You both have your lives ahead of you.........Do the right thing ;)
2006-07-25 09:33:39 · answer #1 · answered by CaliCutie 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I know that you are confused and you do not know what to do, but you have to do something. I agree with the others about the need for you to sit down and communicate with her face to face in private. I know it seems hard and I know it seems like it is never the right moment when you get to see her because none of that matters only what you need to do.
Solution:
Call her up and schedule some planned alone time. Try to do something you both enjoy first. To kind of ease the stress. Of course this activity should be none sexual.
After you're done doing whatever you planned (movies, dinner, et ceter), let the alone time kick in. Start off with questioning why she wants to have a baby with you? Warning, her reason will be something like because I love you. Oh Boy! Just ignore that and brake right into the responsibilities of having a child in this day and age. If this doesn't work. You'll know because there will be yelling and crying. So. . . break quick . . .drop her off at home then wait for her to call you back in like a week or less. At that time say something like. I love you and I want to have a child with you in the right moment. A special moment. I just cant give you that moment right now.
Good luck
Britt
2006-07-25 10:54:30 · answer #2 · answered by grownsexypoet 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her that if she has a baby at 16 and a half, you will be arrested and may go to PRISON for having sex with a minor. That may make her change her mind.
If you always have people hanging around, can't you go for a walk or something. If not, perhaps you're just going to have to carry on talking on the phone, or write her an old fashioned style letter which will tell her how you feel.
I agree with what everyone else said... do not have sex with her but if you really have to then make sure you hold yourself 100% responsible for contraception.
I know someone who was in a similar situation. The woman "forgot to take her pill" (everyone thinks this was deliberate) and he has been paying for it ever since, both financially and emotionally.
I would like to say well done for having such a sensible attitude about this, and I do hope you get to talk to your girlfriend properly soon.
Good luck.
2006-07-25 10:09:26 · answer #3 · answered by dashabout 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well since you dont see her that much anyway stay far far away from her you-know-what. If you have time for that then you have time to talk about not being ready to be a dad. Just think about your future and how it would be if a baby were to come along right now? You need to explain this to her. It is very selfish to put a baby through a life that was yet not ready for her or him. It's a struggle when the mother and father are very young. Tell her she needs to think of the baby first and foremost. If she doesnt understand that then she is not mature enough to mother a child.
2006-07-25 09:27:37 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make a run for it. Do you want to be a parent when still a teenager and have so many wonderful options ahead of you? End it now, and don't have sex with her as she is not to be trusted. There are many girls who dont intend having a baby until their late 20's. Wait until you are ready to establish yourself properly with someone who is mature enough to become a mother.
2006-07-27 09:48:40 · answer #5 · answered by Thia 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it may seem that this is "the girl" but trust me there is a big chance it is not. weight up all the things that you could do if you had a child at such a young age and then look at all the things that you would not be able to do.
If you had a child you will be restricted.
holidays with mates
buying things such as cars, motor bikes, PC's.
education.
you would be expected to provide for this child and you would have to earn money for that. you would not be able to go to college - university until a later stage in your life.
enjoy your teens and 20's and have fun because you will only have it once. Don't run from this girl, but is she in love with you, or in love with the child that you can give her.
2006-07-26 02:58:56 · answer #6 · answered by David C 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you are not ready to have one then that is your answer ...you don't make one ...YOU are not ready. ...if she doesn't like it then she doesn't like it ...you both have to be ready and willing not just one of you ...it's a two way thing you both have to bring it up ...16 1/2 is to young to have a baby anyway ..girls dream of it ....having their own live doll ....but you have to live a bit first ...it's a very big reponsability no one can ever be prepared for what lies ahead after you have a baby and for the next 20 years after ...it doesn't matter how much a person says they know about babies
2006-07-28 12:25:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you better tell her that you are not ready..she wants a baby at 16 going on 17..get real..tell her she wont be able to finsih highschool and a ged is nothing..it gets you no where..also say she will need to get a good job because you wont be able to support her as well as a baby..if she still doesnt listen then take a break..and guess whan im sure youll be 18 soon..so if you get her pregnant..her parents can put your *** in jail so be safe
2006-07-25 09:27:35 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
think u need to explain to her that u are both to young for that just yet, u need time to sort urselves out as adults before u try to have a baby... if anything i would talk to the parents to, they will have to play a big part in the baby up-bringing at that age...
be persistant, if u love the girl don't run, just keep trying to talk to her, do it face to face tho, then u can sort the issues out that arise at the time....
take ur time ur so young!
2006-07-27 11:01:42 · answer #9 · answered by storm.minx 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you live away from her then what she want a baby for,? she is trying to capture and trap you. It looks like if you do what she wants you are stuck with her. Plus, she is under age and it's illegal. Get away from her and find someone else, you got plenty of time,and a baby will tie you down and ruin your young days
2006-07-25 09:46:47 · answer #10 · answered by Jeanette 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋