Ok this is where I'll start well, my bestfriend hated her father cause he has a serious drinking problem & he had the home in a domestic situation.& well yesterday her father went with some friends 2 chill at a beach, however he was drunk went into the water & unfortunately he drowned. Now dat her dad's gone I really dont know if my friend will be devastated with this cause she hated her dad soo much & well I havent seen her as yet 2 know what state she's in. I called her on the phone & well my friend doesn't like ppl 2 worry about her so she fakes something 2 pull dat she's ok. I want 2 go look for her, but my mom knew what goes on in the family, my mom said 2 leave her alone cause when my friend sees me she'll feel guilty cause of the things my friend told me about her dad eg. she hated him. I want 2 go by my friend because I think she needs me alot right now. But guys do you think that my mom's right or should I follow my instincts and go 2 my bestfriend whom is like my little sis
2006-07-25 07:35:28 · 8 answers · asked by emopunkrockerchick 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
First you should let your Mom know, that this is your friend & she has confided in you & she may need you right now. If this doesn't convince your Mom...turn the tables, if you or your Mom lost a family member wouldn't you want your friend there. Don't go behind your Mom's back...your Mom needs to know that you are being level-headed about this & plus you want your Mom's blessing & her respect. If your Mom still doesn't want you to be with your friend, then you may have to stand up for yourself & say "What kind of compassionate firend or human being would I be, if I turn my back on the one person who needs me the most right now."
Second, you need to go to your friend, let her know you are there for her...ask her if there is anything you can do...it may be a shoulder to cry on, it may be your ear to listen...she may cry, she may be remorseful or she may be enraged!...do not interfere, do not offer advice...just listen to her...sometimes people need to verbalize things & in doing so it helps them to heal & it helps them to figure things out for themselves...she may also simply need to know that you are there for her....sometimes this is all it takes...she may even tell you to get lost, but you need to let her know that you are there whenever she needs you, then respect her & step aside until she contacts you again. Given the volitile relationship between her & her father & their family situation it's hard to tell how she's going to react now & in teh coming days & weeks...she needs to mourn, both for her father & for the father-daughter relationship that she wanted, but never had.
Best Wishes :-)
2006-07-25 07:43:29 · answer #1 · answered by kueria 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Be there for her and check out and get her to speak to her mom and dad... By her speakme to them offers her extra choices on wether or now not she desires to preserve it and even adoption she has extra choices now than she is going to later. Her mom and dad will discover out finally simply make certain it isn't to past due. And be a well pal and check out and aid/consultant her to make the offerings she desires and now not what someone "desires" her to do since she am has to manage it afterward in lifestyles it doesn't matter what she makes a decision... And like the lady earlier than mentioned her mom and dad will develop to the concept and sure there is a danger they are going to unfastened it however the will not do any harm her or the child. So inspire her to make her selections in an effort to advantage her eventually.
2016-08-28 18:10:44 · answer #2 · answered by salguero 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can continue to still be there for your best friend. Make sure that you don't take up too much of her space. Let her know that you will still be there for her. You can call her, email her, and visit her every once in a while. Make sure that you give her an ear to listen to and a shoulder to cry on. Your friend will appreciate what you're doing for her and I wish you the best of luck.
2006-07-25 07:46:07 · answer #3 · answered by Lady S 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should at least go there to find what exactly in her mind it's not always clear over phone and one more thing.If you guys are really close then your silence will also going to be a great support.She needs you.Follow your instinct
2006-07-25 07:47:10 · answer #4 · answered by mogli 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would do a little of both...
Call her and email her and tell her that you are there for whatever reason...and you will always be there...but don't crowd her..when she is ready to talk about she will let you know in her own time.
2006-07-25 07:42:28 · answer #5 · answered by Bevin M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go be with your friend. She probably needs you really bad right now. You don't need to say anything, let her talk to you and you listen.
2006-07-25 07:41:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes you should go to her. My dad has adrug problm and hasent contacted me in 2 years i hate him but would be devistated if he died. she may be hesitant though so don't mention it first and don't force anything.
2006-07-25 07:43:40 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
wait a little and then drop by for a couple of hours
2006-07-25 07:40:58 · answer #8 · answered by Velvet Rain Drops 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋