Intro:Yo,baby i wish i could alwayz be by your side i ,i,i didn't meant 2 do u wrong...ohhh ****..
Kept starring at the wall since our last argument...can't say i don't miss it honey..miss the way u laugh,miss the way u act,miss the way u do dat thang honey..I remember the first time we met you taught me how 2 love and how 2 kiss...yes i do miss that kiss
Yeah that was the first *hope itz the last* time i called u a....bitc-h the u took it seriously sweet heart.Now i'm begging in my my knees 2 hear your voice and say that u love me so that we can share our love again baby,i swear by the name of god that the devil was ******* callin me and kept tellin me "leave that bitc-h alone" but honey listen i'm honestly saying it..i'm a changed man
2006-07-25 01:28:29 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Music
good strong storyline, but i don't hear any rhyming...maybe i'd have to hear it outloud. The only thing i don't get is that at the end you say you're a changed man, but she cheated on you. Yes you lost it but you'd have every right to. Keep working on it, sounds like it could be good
2006-07-25 01:34:29 · answer #1 · answered by melissa c 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well done, could be a bit better e.g it isnt really relevant to call the girl a ***** in a love song about her, but im sure you will take this as advice so u could improve, ignore everyone elses selfish comments, its Very Goodxxx
2006-07-25 08:35:22 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
bullet proof bulett proof check out my style
follow the vader and veiw my profile
droping bombs is what i play
busting caps in grannys today
life is hard in timaru
mothers dont know what a ****** been through
living large on the crack house stage
filling young minds **** of rage
bullet proof foot soldier player bp
join the vaders and bust caps with me
taking these hoews on a new dimension
cuse and effect makin the tension
humptyu dumpty sat on a wall
mother!@#@#$ made a bad call
from my albu,m nursery rhymes to make you freak at night
2006-07-25 09:07:06 · answer #3 · answered by arghhh 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can't quite feel a flow of rythum. The writing is decent and it seems like a sad story, but it seems kind of off to be a rap. It is really hard to write song/rap lyrics and expect people to catch the flow of it just by reading. The beat and flow in your mind does not transfer with your lyrics, unfortunately. Still, decent story.
2006-07-25 08:35:30 · answer #4 · answered by Whatev' Yo' 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it was inspired by actual events in your life it sucks to be you.
Rap lyrics never sound good. It's the beat and the delivery.
I hope you find another bitc-h and forget that one.
2006-07-25 08:36:04 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Man as a song it aint working but as a statement to that woman.... she has only 2 responses 1.OK Iwas wrong and i'm back for good. 2. I stepped cause you cant get the job little man aint comin back for more.
reaper steppin.................
2006-07-25 08:53:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Homey, you're straight up ghetto and you are dating a $2 ho. Up your game kid. Read a book.
2006-07-25 11:40:39 · answer #7 · answered by stereotypes_are_true 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he man,wots up, thats a fine try by u , try writin some more of it, n also try to give music to it, i appriciate ur work, good luck , keep writin n rappin
2006-07-25 09:24:58 · answer #8 · answered by captain_jacksparrow 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, i liked the first half, the second half wasn't as catchy.
2006-07-25 08:37:26 · answer #9 · answered by wolfgirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Posting them here is stupid. What if by chance they were good. Someone can read them , then make them their own.
2006-07-25 08:32:21 · answer #10 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋