do you like my rhymes?

Question

im am the real jayvader
hookin it up with the real crusader
old ladies we intimidate
as when we rob them we agrovate
why is a brother so full of hate
can a niga go forward in a white mans state
i rhyme cause im am the villin
bustin caps is how im chillen
mother@#$^% alway dissin on me
wont play my rhymes on the m.t.v

humpty dumpty sat on a wall
gona mowem down in the mall
the mini uzi sprays hot lead
old school feel i make em dead
i wake up in a the night
i reconise my skin is white
race and colour you yanks are sad
mother sais i have no dad

Answer 1

good job... keep going.... I'm patiently... (impatiently) waiting

Answer 2

Sorry no because it's rap. And it sounds to me like you are the racist one because of your lyrics-- can a niga go forward in a white mans state. What the heck is wrong with you.

Answer 3

I can see you're no fool
Because your rhymes are so cool
But if I had to be yellin
It would be bout yo spellin
Cuz it sometimes gets strange
But the way you arrange
Your words is quite good indeed
You're a genuine member of the poetry breed

Jayvader
Crusader
I'll tell you again
I read it
I liked it
Now slap me my 10

Answer 4

Its Alright just that adding the humpty dumpty part isnt gangster so you should try editing that part of the verse. But still Great just need a little editing on that part and it should sound nicer. =)

Cheers!

Answer 5

4rom da hood and *****-z ain't havin their own right-right...
Can't eat,can't laught,can't even swing in the middle of the night.
Yo...what else can i say brotha all these white kidz livin in da paradise and haven't taste the hell....but just like 2pac said itz a white manz world and mama keep ya head up and stay strong cause the rain don't last long and bush ain't shi-t...hope he was blown up in katrina instead of wars and killingz..and then you blame us playa hataz that we some weak *** bitc-h *****-z who can't do nuttin but smoke smoke some weed and keep saying the "f" word muthafuckaz....word up..!
Keep hatin,keep saying that i'm the slave in thiz muthafuca,but ain't no shi-t can express my ryhmes..huh my *****-z can never be faded though and if u wanna speak 'bout racism then letz face it before we replace it white folks...would't u do the same thing if u were black.But no son i'm not saying that in full of hate cause real true ni-ggaz don't give a ***** if white folks wanna be racist then let it be...but letz not forget who started this *****racism fulla hate*as it goes alil some like this........

Answer 6

Man....what can I say? Move out of your parents basement, stop playing video games, find a job, even if no self respecting person will sleep with you, if you have a job at least you can pay for it. Hey, Poser...get a life!

Answer 7

Hummmmmmm

Answer 8

Eh....I do, but I don't really care for yours.
It doesn't mesh well. It reminds me of something that would be constructed by a middle schooler.
I dunno what to tell you. It doesn't sound professional.
I dunno...I just don't like it. Try listening to more Snoop or something.
Sorry.

Btw, stop blaming white people. I don't hate you, so why do you hate me? (Now who's racist) Shittty things happen to everyone. You have to suck it up and move on.

Answer 9

hey, wot do u wanna say?
it doesnt make much sense 2 me.

u can rhyme well, but the lines dont make sense!

Answer 10

its nice, but maybe u can write a better 1.
keep it up .