I've been married for 5 years, as soon as my a** got married we did a automatic significant drop in our sex life as soon as I got married. I felt trapped and betrayed. I know a lot of other guys who are married told me this too. They feel they're wife doesn't love them anymore because their sex life dropped as soon as they got married. I think sometimes it's best to be single...at least I was more sexually active as a single man than I am as a married man! I was cleaning up the house all the time, pampering, babying her, doing everything and still no progress in intimacy what so ever. I was beginning to hate my marriage. I felt betrayed and a lot of other guys told me they felt the same way, some of them are divorced now. Why do you stop giving it up as soon as you get married?
2006-07-24 20:20:22 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
First stop categorizing women as a whole.. if u look at alot of these questions u'll see alot of married women have the same problem as ur having but with their husband.. my husband wishes id want sex less lol then he'd actually get sleep once in awhile lol..
Im going to tell u just like i tell those women.. 1st stop using ur marriage as a debating tool on whether u should be single or not.. to late for that, time to be a REAL man and realize that although u have needs, that Marriage was a vow and a promise ment to with hold no matter what.. so stop thinking its something u can just get rid of like a piece of trash.. Now lets just focus on the problem at hand.. first ever thought that maybe ur making it to easy for her to have the power where sex is concerned??? i see ur saying ur doing all this for her in hopes she'll give u sex.. STOP.. although most women wish their husbands would do all that.. obviously your wife is taking advantage of the fact that your being so kind .. Stop doing it!! try giving her the cold shoulder without being rude.. but act as if your not interested suddenly..and do your own thing.. stop doing things for her.. when she finally starts realizing that your not catering to her every whim and u've stopped wanting sex from her she's going to wonder whats up.. and when she does, simply say well when u want a husband instead of a caterer let me know, untill then.. this is the way it'll be.. You need her just as much as she needs u, and she needs to fufill your needs as a wife just as much as u need to fufill her needs as a husband.. basically she needs a reality check.. alot of people love it when people are pining over them and loving the power trip they can get off of it.. so flip the script and take back the power.. Fight with your mind, women need to be loved, need attention, need affection.. when suddenly ur giving her the cold shoulder she should wonder whats going on and worrying.. Give it a try u've tried everything else, and when she realizes how good she had it a man catering to her and wanting her, maybe once u open her eyes to how shes taken it for granted, then u can go back to being sweet but with out her not appreciating it the next time around....
Good luck. but dont give up, thats a boys way out of it.. be a real man and real men use their brains to figure out solutions to their problems not their peckers..
2006-07-24 20:32:47 · answer #1 · answered by brwneyedgrl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
With a lady or girl the primary query you ask is, "what's it she desires?" Women seldom wish leisure intercourse. They wish a courting. She it sounds as if desires you to go away your spouse and 3 youngsters for her, the naughty lady. Maybe now not, possibly she simply likes the notion of boinking the boss. She did not seduce you, you went to her condo so that you knew what could occur. Now as on your spouse. How could you believe if she used to be doing it with an extra man? You could believe betrayed and irritated, proper? It is as much as you whether or not you inform you spouse for those who simply did it the only time and would possibly not be going again for an extra circular with the naughty lady. If you repeat,, she's going to ultimately discover out. If you do not inform her and she or he reveals out, you must be sincere and inform it used to be a major mistakes in judgment and it simplest occurred as soon as. Work could also be your greatest difficulty. Since you're an outstanding, she might declare sexual harassment wherein case the enterprise will look after however hearth your butt. If you'll be able to discover an extra location within the enterprise to paintings or a brand new task with an extra enterprise and a lift, do it! You cannot preserve running along with her.
2016-08-28 18:25:00 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am not sure why other women don't as often, I don't right now because I am prego. Some women have told be they are not interested because they have gained weight. They are self conscious. I saw a morning show on TV about this. There was a big special on it. It is actually common in about 75% of the US. I was shocked.
2006-07-24 20:27:53 · answer #3 · answered by singitoutloudandclear 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sometimes during a marriage people often get too comfortable and take for granted the spouses needs. it seems like this has happened to you. you need to open and honest with her. tell her about it before it goes too far. let her know that your needs are not being met. Open communication like this is a must in a marriage or it usually winds up on a one way ticket to divorce.
2006-07-24 21:01:02 · answer #4 · answered by Tracey E 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Although sxybrwneyedg provided a very reasonable explanation of how to tackle the problem as well as resloving it, i still do not feel that so comfortable with her answer. It could back-fired.
Look at all those posting about cheating. Most of them feel neglected by their other half and the cheating starts. So, if you are gonna apply her suggestion (which is good), plan it carefully....
Best of luck to you...
2006-07-24 22:18:32 · answer #5 · answered by Jack T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm on the other side of the equation. Didn't have sex before getting married, and now that we are married, we have it heaps. Very happy man. For you, talk to her about it and how you feel.
2006-07-24 20:25:45 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
not all women are like that, you need to sit down with her and bring up this subject. your not going to find out unless you do. its ok to try and be nicer to her by doing all those things but when it is not working there is something else wrong that she is not telling you, she might be going threw something in the marriage that she has not been open with you on. so it is up to you to save your marriage and sex life by sitting down one on one and talking to her, remembering to be subtle on things women are sensative so be sensative twords her. but ask her and then together you can find ways to fix it, if she will not tell you, then tell her it is not good for the marriage, that you dont want it to go on like this but that you dont want to get divorced either, tell her that you will be there for her for the both of you to do whatever is necessary to fix the problem , you dont want to sound like you are attacking her with your words. if you dont do this things wont get better, so its time to step up since she isnt and take the lead role in resolving this, good luck!
2006-07-24 20:37:12 · answer #7 · answered by Blonds Rock 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
But dont you know that statistically married men live longer.
.........Miserable.........but longer...LOL
Maybe cuz our schedules are too full that just the thought of sex is exhausting.
2006-07-24 20:25:14 · answer #8 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not true! I'm the one who wants more of it than what my husband is giving me.
2006-07-24 20:48:02 · answer #9 · answered by Worried 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think it was the other way around , my hubby slowed down a lot. I do love him. talk to her. communication,
2006-07-24 20:23:38 · answer #10 · answered by ~*Jenny*~ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋