Our baby is 19 months & start to get naughty. At what age we should spank or scold him if he is not obey ?

Answer 1

Please don't spank. Don't take anyones' advice here if they recommend it. I have studied childhood development and have 3 of my own and it is wrong to spank.
You should watch a few shows of Supernanny and Nanny 911. All their techniques are really effective, we use them and they work great. They also have a book out and all the discipline techniques are step by step. You have to stick with a plan and follow through each time so that he knows you mean business. Children need to predict the outcome in order to behave good in the future. Never spank, using fear and pain is the wrong way to go about it.
Spanking is a form of violence that teaches children that inflicting fear and pain on others is a way to control their behavior. Parents who spank are out of control and are not disciplined parents. It just teaches children how to hit, how to be sneaky, how to fear, how to be ashamed and how to take anger out on others. All degrees of spanking- light, moderate, occasional, rarely, always- give children the wrong kind of attention. You want your child to follow rules because they are right and good, not to avoid punishment because they are scared and become sneaky. When parents spank, they stop their children at the lowest level of moral development. So all the idiots that recommend to spank are eroding their childs ability to be empathetic. When you react with anger to childrens' behavior, we teach them to act without considering another persons' feelings-another consequence we need to avoid. Then when your child doesn't have empathy, it is impossible for them to learn to share, play well with others, avoid angry and violent actions, and take responsibility for their actions.
So I hope you don't take the spanking route. Go out and get those books, they will help.

Answer 2

So far as I understand children under the age of two don't have a strong connection between action and consequence.

(That is why babies seem so delighted when they twitch and accidentally knock something down; it is a new concept to them. Which apparently takes a while to cement down)

Around 19 months they may be starting to grasp the concept of action and reaction pretty well. But they may not yet be able to be responsible for it fully yet. It depends on your own child, some children are quicker and some move at their own pace.

Do they seem to obey when it leads to something they obviously want? i.e. if you put all your toys away in that box, I will give you a cookie? If they can follow directions for a reward they should also understand it for corrections.

As long as it is immediate in nature. Children of this age have almost no understanding of time. If you take them all the way to their room before correction they "crime" may already be lost and the "punishment" seems arbitrary.

So "If you throw your toy again, I will not give it back to you." May be much more effective than.. "If you throw your juice again You can have a timeout in your room."

I do believe children of a young age respond better to physical notice than words. If the child does something dangerous like reach for a pan on the stove, (even if it is not on at the moment) you must tell the child 'If you reach for the stove again I will spank you." They will likely try to test their limits and see if it true. When they do you have to reinforce the truth of the statement to ensure their safety and your authority as parents.

If they reach you have to spank. Tell them "I warned you if you reach for the stove I would spank you." They may cry, but children actually feel better knowing that an adult is in control. It helps them know if something bad is going on that someone is in charge.

But don't ever "correct" in anger. And never excessively. It should produce a "reality check". Basically stop the kid in their tracks and make them take a look at what is going on, and remind them who the adult is, and who know what is best.

Good luck.

Answer 3

From W.C. Fields

"When a child is born, it should be sealed in a barrel and fed through the bunghole. When the child reaches the age of 12, the bunghole should be tightly sealed"

In answer to your question, you are reaching the terrible two's. Good luck with that. Keep in mind, when they go into tantrums, no discipline works. Spank scold, whatever, it does not work. They grow out of it at the age of three. Until they hit 12 anyway...

-Dio

Answer 4

There isn't an age where all of a sudden you start disciplining your child. It suggests that before that age he/she was invincible and all acts before that were unpunishable. Don't let your son fall into any bad habits or assumptions. You have to be able to tell him No now, or you will quickly lose control of the situation.

You don't necessarily have to spank him, but make sure he knows what is wrong and right and that if he does something deliberately bad he will be punished.

Answer 5

Please understand that I do not recommend child abuse, nor spanking all the time! Your son is at an age where he is coming into his own personality and is showing his independence! It's a wonder full time, but bad behavior from him isn't cute nor acceptable! I would recommend "time out" after a warning to him concerning what he is saying or doing. Never allow your child to talk back to you....saying "no" etc. nor to hit you ! Likewise use your own words carefully such as ,"I don't like the way you are talking to me, until you can talk nicely I don't want to talk to you."...that works.....hope this helps you, as i raised three daughters and have been blessed with five grandchildren, who I love without measure but don't tolerate a nasty mouth nor attitude nor action!

Answer 6

You are late you have some catching up to do you should have started out when the child first came home. My wife and I are ahveing that same problem right now she says that I am to hard on the child but when I say jump he jumps and when she says jump he just looks at her, like now she is trying to watch tv and he brothing her she will not call me because she will think that she will here I told you so but that is not so, you must let them knoe that what you say you mean and no if and buts about it. get on them and stay on them they will try to get away with all that they can. All that I can say is remember when you where a child and the curse that you parents put on you ( I hope that you child will be worse than you).

Answer 7

umm...the minute they sart to get into things they arent supposed to is when u tell them no..my baby is 11 months and already knows to listen when i say no...obviously don't hurt ur child but a little whack on the bottom at that age is entirely appropriate..also use timeouts. remember..trying to discipline a child is useless if u are not consistant..and dont use empty threats...there should be a warning followed by a consiquence.....such as if u hit mommy u will get a timeout...then if child doesnt listen follow thru immediatley

Answer 8

I used to believe in spanking but I don't anymore. If someone touched my children I would lose my mind. So why would someone who loves them more than anyone else in the world hit them?

Answer 9

now would be a good time, but u don't beat him like u would an older child. spank his little hands and let him know what he is doing is wrong. it only takes a little bit to scold a little child.

Answer 10

My daughter is 14 months old. I pop her hand if she messes with the electrical outlets, etc. If I tell her no too many times, I will pop her on the hand then as well. I know that my daughter understands the word 'no'. When I catch her turning off the TV, she runs away as soon as I call her name. It's funny, but she needs to listen to what I say. It is up to you when and if you decide to discipline him. If you think he understands, you can start now.