I feel like i cant talk to anybody about it, but i think i may feel a little better if i "type" about it. Okay, my ex and i was dating for about a month and a half. He was cool to talk to sometimes, but i wassnt really feeling him sexually. So i chilled at his house one nite watchin tv, then out of no where he just started kissin me and im like whoa, because it just came out of no where. But then it got alright and i went along with him, then he ask could he do oral sex on me. So i was like ok i guess, but i didnt want to have sex with him because i wassnt ready to go there with him yet. But when he was "doin me", out of no where he pushed himself in me. So righ then im in shock, and durin his 3 minutes, im tryna get him off me and yellin stop and he gets up and ejaculates. Then he starts talking to me and actin like he didnt just violate me, like i just didnt slap him and screamed at him. Then i asked him to take me home and i havnt talked to him since. I feel so bad and just weird.
2006-07-24 13:57:53 · 11 answers · asked by ? 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Im sorry its so long, but i just needed to get all of it out. And i just dont know what to do, i been prayin, but that night just wont get out of my head.
2006-07-24 13:59:00 · update #1
im 19, b4 this i neva really went all the way with a guy, because i wassnt never quite ready, and im scared to talk to somebody or call the police. And im especially afriad to tell my sister shes goin to be on me like why was i over there in the first place. I feel in my heart that he is gon lie and people is going to look at me and be like, well she was at his home and they were engaged in sexual activity
2006-07-24 14:26:28 · update #2
hey hun its not your fault ok hes just a sick perverted f**k ok i no excatly wot your going through i was younger then but i can tel u one thing im not over it and thats because i havent talked about it you need to find someone that you can trust a best friend or ring rape crises ok they no wot to do and can help im going to be getting help as well and hun i will support you all the way ok
2006-07-24 14:46:45 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear Bothered:
Talking (or typing) about problems often helps a person get through difficult times, but in this case, a little more action is required.
A lot of different things come into play here, but the major issue here is Rape... a violent violation of a sexual nature. Make no mistake: even before you said stop, it was rape... because it was without your consent... the question is: how do you want to deal with it.
Every state has laws enacted that protect people from violent assaults like you experienced. Whether he was there 3 minutes or 3 seconds, he was WRONG. As the victim, you have the right and obligation to report him... after all.. if he did it to you, he will do it to someone else. And the longer you wait, the harder it will become.
Be prepared for a number of people to call you a liar... unfortunately there is still an attitude in this country that causes people to fix some blame on the victim. I apologize in advance for that... it's gonna be a difficult road, but a necessary one if you want real closure in this issue.
There's also the issue of your ages... but since you didn't disclose that, I won't expound here...
In the very least, you need to make sure that you break all contact with this guy and you may even consider getting some counseling. Many communities have centers that provide no-cost or low-cost counseling to victims of rape. Check with your local church or hospital for more information on that.
TLC
2006-07-24 21:18:47 · answer #2 · answered by Rev T L Clark 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No one is going to like my answer because I'm not going to play along with the party line of blaming it on the man.
Sorry to say this, but when you granted him permission to perform the act of cunnilingus, you granted him complete access down there. If he already penetrated you with his tongue and fingers then there isn't much difference about him penetrating you with his penis.
I don't think it will stand up in court very well. Now if you didn't grant him access down there and he held you down to perform the act of cunnilingus and then had sexual intercourse with you, then it would most diffidently be rape.
What he did, was a dirty trick.
He basically filled you, got you wet, and then jumped ya.
I got a feeling the reason why he did that, is there is a lot guys out there that have been humiliated by women. What I mean by this is, the man goes to the breaking point with a woman and out of the blue she says "STOP".
What I believe is, he is just trying to get back at being humiliated...
Sorry....
It would be nice if men and women could see eye to eye and stop this stupid sexist war.
2006-07-24 22:36:26 · answer #3 · answered by Harry Cat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you did the right thing if he cant respect you enough then you shouldn't be with him i know what you are going threw cause i was in a abusive relationship for a few months before i got married and i couldn't talk to any one cause the guy was my best friends brother in law so i couldn't talk to her but since you feel free to open up to total strangers maybe you should try and talk to a girlfriend about it or maybe even a counselor because like i said i didn't talk to any one and it still has a effect on me and i have been married for ten years to a great guy good luck hope you get to feeling better soon
2006-07-24 21:07:16 · answer #4 · answered by christy b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well he basically raped u..not someone to be friends with..should go talk to social services or teh police...there is a big difference in oral and sex..just ask the last President..he has to stop when you say to..sound as if he isnt much anyway lasting only 3 minutes
2006-07-24 21:03:55 · answer #5 · answered by vincenzo445 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm srry about what happened but it's true he raped you and you should go to a clinic and check yourself because you never know if he had any STD'S and you should also consider talking to a counselor or friend and tell them what happened so they can help you.
2006-07-24 21:08:49 · answer #6 · answered by la_reina 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate to say it, but, girl, he raped you!
Whether or not you started having oral sex with him, you told him to stop, and he didn't!
You need to talk to someone, and now.
If you don't feel like involving the police, you need to go to a clinic or your personal doctor. SOMEONE!
You're right, he violated you and you need to report him!
2006-07-24 21:02:54 · answer #7 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont feel weird about it i mean like he totally violated your privacy and plus you had to like suffer for like a billion minutes unless it felt good but thats besides the oint. just do what your heart tell you
2006-07-24 21:06:12 · answer #8 · answered by Courtney 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he totally disrespected u. but how sad, 3 minutes. what a loser! go find a man, stop datin little preejaculating boys. haha.
2006-07-24 21:13:46 · answer #9 · answered by JustiN CrediblE 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG!!!! I think that is totally wrong of him. I definatly wouldnt have anything to do with him again. Maybe you should think about telling someone what he did to you.. That is unreal!!!!
2006-07-24 21:01:56 · answer #10 · answered by Sweet96 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋