Gay People: Why do most of you choose a person assuming the opposite sex?

Question

For instance why do I see a lesbian couple where one seems to carry herself like the woman she is and the other woman assumes a more masculine role, and vice versa for gay guys? Whats up with that?

Answer 1

You see that because you're looking for it. Most couples find freedom from traditional gender roles; relationships become significantly more evenly balanced and equal.

Answer 2

There are, among gay males, masculine and feminine and nurturers and non.

Some times couples shake out that way, and sometimes not. Sometimes you can tell, and sometimes not.

You might figure out because I'm a nurturer, I take care of people, but you wouldn't know otherwise. Jonathan is completely invisible if he wants to be (we are both out - so it isn't an issue, but if we weren't) but he's the bottom.

Now mind you, it isn't for masculinity or anything else that I choose. He loved me, now almost 15 years later, we are still together. If he hadn't fallen for me and a cute little gay boi that was very feminine had -- and had loved me as much as Jonathan did, we would be together.

I don't care whether they are masculine or feminine, only that they are good and loving and caring of others, and that, no matter what their demeanor and no matter what its size -- they have a d**k and a slender body, and male t**s.

Regards,

Reynolds Jones
http://www.rebuff.org
[e-mail]

Answer 3

It's not about physical appearance. Although one woman may assume a more masculine role, she is still a woman, with women feelings.

Answer 4

Not true.
I'm a masculine man and I appreciate other masculine men.

It always makes me wonder why, in straight couples, some women always want to feminize their men by making them shave their chest and all their facial hair. It's basically the same question that you're asking above.

Answer 5

that's a stereotype, and doesn't apply only to gays and lesbians. have you never noticed this in straight couples? most couples don't have one who is the "man" and one who is the "woman."
lesbians are 2 women, and gay men are still 2 men. you need to get out more and meet more gay people...you'll see that stereotype is mostly a crock.

Answer 6

People are who they are comfortable being. As a fairly femme girl I've seen and even met many straight women who are waaayyy more "butch" than I am. It's all about being comfortable in your own skin. I love who I love for the way I feel when I'm with her, not based on how feminine/masculine she is.

Answer 7

Many do not do that. That's a sterotype. Have you heard of lipstick lesbians? Or have you checked out the women on "The L Word?"

Answer 8

It's not all of us. some of us actually like to be with someone who can be just like us masculine. And the other thing is mainly preference, it makes the decision on who we date.

Answer 9

My experience is that in more tarditional societies/cultures (e.g. african Zulu etc), you find that gays tend to play a specific role in the relationship in society. In more non-traditional societies you rarely find that people play such a specific role. (BUT that is true whether you are GAY or STRAIGHT)

Answer 10

its personal preference. i am a feminine lesbian and i like other fem lesbians. i am not attracted to butch lesbians at all. u are generalising and being narrow minded