How can I make a guy understand that I want his friendship only when he seems to want a love relationship?

Question

I know this guy a short time ago & I call him from time to time 'cause he keeps on calling me & asks me to call him cause he wants help or advice (that's my weak point). I made it clear to him from the beggining that I like him as a brother only but he has never expressed his feelings the same way. The problem is that he's married & as he keeps on complaining to me about his wife. I don't like to hear those things about his family but he keeps on bringing it up in our conversations & I can't ignore him when he's complaining. Although I'm interested in having him as a friend cause we share the same interests & he encourages me a lot when no one is there for me but I don't want him to mistake that for a love relationship and I don't want him to accuse me one day of breaking his heart. The problem is that he never asked me out frankly & I hate to stop communications with him just like that without giving him a good reason. Tell me guys how can agirl make it clear that she's not interested

Answer 1

Hes calling you to attempt to keep this non- relationship going, and that is also why he keeps tring to get you to keep calling him.
Hes very unstable to try and do this when hes married himself. He needs help but not yours. I'm sure hes very nice about all of this but hes still just trying to bide his time tell he thinks you might have a weakness he can take advantage of.
You need to be strong here so more than just the male friend doesn't get hurt.It sounds like the kind of things hes telling you may not be appreciated by his spouse. All that negative energy hes giving you doesn't help you either, its his way of setting you up.
I'm really not a mean guy but hes not doin you any favors.

Answer 2

You can't. He will always view you as someone he wants to bang. When you go on a date, he's gonna get jealous. When you bring someone over for the night, he's gonna get hurt. He likes you a lot, maybe even thinks that he loves you. You maybe seem accessable to him, despite your best efforts, and he probably has a hard time meeting other chicks.

You're in deep now, and there's no way to pull out without hurting him. The best thing you can do is go on with your life, and make light of any attempts on his part to progress the relationship to a more intimate level. Don't always take his calls.

It's not your fault and it's not your problem. The only thing you can do is to distance yourself from him and let him figure it out on his own.

Answer 3

I think that this is hard. Guys don't get the point sometimes. Women just want a friendship and they always want more. Anyhow, you should just tell him that your not interested, again, and tell him to work things out with his wife. Try to encourage him to move on with his wife. Maybe if you talk about him and her in a positive way, he'll get your point. Hopefully!

Answer 4

First, you should be clear here......he does not want a love relationship, he wants a sex relationship. Love is so a girl thing. He wants to have sex with you, not candle light dinners.

All, you can do is to simply tell him to knock it off. If he does not, you might have to break off the friendship or just put up with his flirting.

Answer 5

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Answer 6

look girl,theres not really much 2 say,'cause i know u know what u have 2 do,i been,well actually i m in a very similar situation right now,n i made my friend understand,how?just tel'in him the truth,and that if he really loves me as he feels he does,he would truthly understand n let go,if he loves u as he says he does he is relly going 2 understand that u cant force some one 2 feel some thing they dont feel. dont b afraid n never do nothin that ur heard is not in it. holla!!!!!!!

Answer 7

I didn't read all that cause I don't got all day but have you tried telling him. It shouldn't kill him if he knows you just want to be friends.
Most guys like girls to be honest with them even if it hurts them just a little bit. They don't need to waste there time liking a girl who doesn't like them. They would rather hit on a girl that likes them.
Good luck with your guy problems. We all have plenty.

Answer 8

STOP CALLING HIM and don't contact him in any way. By staying in touch, you're keeping his hopes alive. Cut off all communications. You're causing the problem you're telling us you don't want.

Answer 9

Just tell him you are a friend not a piece of meat or a sounding board.

Answer 10

tell him you just want to be friends and if he wants more than that then goodbye. You don't need the drama, no guy is worth it, especially one you don't have intimate feelings for.