today I told my daughter she wouldnt get the free ice cream with her meal if she didnt eat the meal..she picked all through the meal but barely ate..after countless threats of no ice- cream-I went to the bathroom and dad got it for her.He does it all the time-he's over compensating for the time he's not around and drives me nuts
2006-07-24 10:42:22 · 11 answers · asked by cassiepiehoney 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He doesnt understand the "united front". Youve got to sit him down and express to him the gravity of what hes doing now before your child gets older. He isnt around as much so he feels guilty...understandable...but not at your expense. Nip it now while the child is young and you can still shape her how you need.
2006-07-24 11:55:45 · answer #1 · answered by Johnny 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Can you possibly negotiate a plan for raising the child? It's really not good for her to be able to play one parent against the other. Let me suggest that it's probably not the specific rule you follow as to be firm in the rule and consistent in application. Children learn VERY early that they can play one parent off against the other.
2006-07-24 17:54:00 · answer #2 · answered by DelK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I too have a daughter, I too do the same thing. Not on purpose but I love her to death and would do anything for her. Until I read this question, I did not know how my wife felt about it. I guess I will have to talk to her tonight about it but don't be too hard on him, in his eyes, he is trying to do the right thing, that's all.
2006-07-24 18:01:11 · answer #3 · answered by Andy S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Simple, next time he has time off work, arrange to go away for 3-4 days, he will soon see how hardwork bringing up children is.
2006-07-25 10:19:30 · answer #4 · answered by A Good Guy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol - that's normal for parents who aren't around...they will completely let kids get away with anything because they want to be nice to make up for feeling guilty.
You need to talk with him, and let him know he is NOT helping your daughter by giving her things. You need to be a team...any parenting book will tell you that.
If he STILL undermines you...I don't know what you can do...I mean...you can't MAKE someone change, they have to want to do it themselves. Hopefully by appealing to his parental effect, you can....
Good luck!
2006-07-24 17:48:39 · answer #5 · answered by Nightwish 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should write a letter to dear abby and then clip the column and show it to him... she certainly has a way with words and hopefully it will embarrass him into finding a way to change, it's not good for her to grow up thinking that she can charm men into anything and I have seen girlfriends grow up in a situation where daddy's not around and overcompensates with giving in - most of them ended up stripping their way through "medical school".
2006-07-24 17:52:50 · answer #6 · answered by stagger lee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree that you need to talk to him. He's just making harder for you and sooner or later your child won't obey you on anything and that's headed for trouble.
2006-07-24 18:05:55 · answer #7 · answered by This, That & such 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to have a seriuos talk with him as to how you two are going to raise your daughter and what form of disciplain will be used.
2006-07-24 17:49:07 · answer #8 · answered by jpcbbc 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have a serious talk with him. If he doesn't change, counter-undermine him.
2006-07-25 04:45:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
kick him in the nuts
2006-07-24 17:46:09 · answer #10 · answered by ibrushallday 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋