He claims that her house is always untidy and says that all men will cheat under those circumstances.
He has been her live in lover for two years.
According to him he is only staying with her because of her booby size (36c).
When she confronts him about his cheating habits, he simply reply by saying her continious nagging drives him into other womens arms.What is she to do?
2006-07-24 10:27:42 · 42 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Gender Studies
She should leave him. He is blaming HER for HIS OWN problems with fidelity. He's also putting her down and making her feel like she's too unworthy to stay with, that the only thing good about her are her breasts. These are both manipulative tricks used by abusers: not physical but mental abusers. She is being mentally abused every time this guy puts her down. The problem is that many people who are abused don't leave, because they are convinced by their lovers that they deserve it or that they caused it somehow. She might be feeling really low, and feel like he's better than her and she should hold to him right now, or that she can change and turn him around, because he's been making her feel unworthy, but she IS worthy and she needs someone to let her know it!
Your job as her sister is to help her leave him, not by chastising her for letting him stay around, or by knocking him down (she knows, deep down, that he's a jerk already), but by lifting her up. Keep in close contact with her and be her friend, tell her you love her and that you think she deserves not to be cheated on and mentally abused. Go out shopping with her and tell her how great she looks. If you know her friends, get all her friends together and go out with her at least once a week, get her out of the house so she knows she can get love from her friends and that she doesn't need a man to have love. If you can, offer to let her stay at your house anytime she wants, so that if she decides to leave him but doesn't feel she can kick him out, she has a place to go. Be there for her as much as possible, and hopefully she'll dump this loser soon!
If you can talk about this with her, also encourage her to use a condom whenever she has sex with this guy. If he's cheating on her he could be exposing her to all kinds of STDs, including HIV, so encourage her to protect herself, and if her won't wear a condom, she should use a female condom and take her life into her own hands!
2006-07-24 10:42:55 · answer #1 · answered by cay_damay 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
First,do they have children together? She should confront him and say how she feels. To me it seems that he's still there for reasons besides big breast.....Spoiled? She probably has a fear of being alone! that's normal. She should get courage and tell him what she wants and feels....obviously this guy is self-centered and a very foolish individual. Like I always say "I rather be lonely, than be with bad company". And besides carma is a motha..U know the rest! Just tell her to live him and once she does she'll realize that life has alot more to offer....hope this will help..good luck! Almost forgot....tell him if it is her nagging that's driving him to the arms of another women, that right there alone should be a sign of an unrefixable relationship. There always more fish in the sea!
2006-07-24 10:42:58 · answer #2 · answered by R30695 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is she to do? Kick the bum out perhaps? Who's paying the rent? if it's her, tell her to wake the fcuk up and kick him to the curb. If it's both of them together, tell her to start saving up some money to get her own place.
He's giving her bullshyt excuses. he cheats because HE wants to, not because the house is sloppy or nagging or because the lamp is on the wrong side of the room.
And if she has 36 Cs, she can easily find another man. But, hey, if she wants to live with a cheating liar for the next 10 years and be miserable, go right ahead...
2006-07-24 10:31:42 · answer #3 · answered by bodinibold 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that the obvious answer here is for her to dump him. If he doesn't appreciate what he has and the kind of girl she is, she doesn't deserve him. He sounds like an *** who is only in it because of her body. And, since she already knows about him cheating on her, why is she still hanging around her. She may love him, but he obviously does not love and respect her enough to be a loyal and trustworthy boyfriend. Take it from a girl who knows, if he cheats... DUMP!!! He obviously isn't worth it. Also, he sounds like a bad lier and needs better excuses! =] Hope I helped!!! =]
2006-07-24 13:18:12 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
And she falls for that? Keeping the place neat is not just her job and it is no excuse for cheating. The nagging excuse is called a circular argument. The more he cheats, the more she will nag and vice versa. It's a no win situation for her because she lets him play her. She should put him out but she doesn't sound too bright.
2006-07-24 10:32:16 · answer #5 · answered by notyou311 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Poor baby, so he's the victim huh? This guy sounds like such a jerk! Why would she want to be with someone like that? So he's just with her because of her boob size?! That's just wrong. Why would she even consider being with him after he was with another women? She deserves someone much better than that. You need to sit her down and make her see all the wrong he is doing to her. Good luck.
2006-07-24 10:40:38 · answer #6 · answered by AngelLuv 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you asking this question and not your sister? Maybe she feels better with the situation the way it is instead of how it could be. Some people are more comfortable with disorder and chaos than others. If it bothers your sister enough she will know what to do and no one else will have to tell her. Choices, (I can't say it enough) we all have them.
2006-07-24 14:49:57 · answer #7 · answered by gmommy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs to leave his sorry ***, there is no excuse on cheating. Once a cheat will always cheat. He is just trying to find excues for what he is doing. And not feeling guilty about it. There is no way for a women should stay in that situation. It is unhealthy for her to be in it. Like that saying once shame on you twice shame on you. Tell her to leave him
2006-07-24 10:32:46 · answer #8 · answered by Newlywed 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out fast before her 36c sags to an 18 flat!
Then her continuous 'sagging' will be his main excuse to leave her for good.
2006-07-24 14:08:35 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What a crock! She's not a plaything. Get out while the getting is good. This guy is asking for a boot to the curb.
2006-07-24 12:04:46 · answer #10 · answered by Marvinator 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋