I only have visitation and I pay my child support. I only have my child for a few hours once a week and then once a month for a full weekend. My ex never gives me any change of clothes or diapers. So I buy new clothes new diapers and so on and before you know it she has out grown everything and has only used the clothes once. Since she has full custody isn't she supposed to provid anything that the child might need under my care, I mean isn't that what the child support is for.
2006-07-24 10:13:13 · 18 answers · asked by Hunter7 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
uh...try goodwill and garage sales. you can get really good clothes really cheap to keep at your home and then you won't have to worry about packing her up before you take her back to mom's!
2006-07-24 10:18:26 · answer #1 · answered by Gabby_Gabby_Purrsalot 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First I would like to say a thank you from all single mothers for paying your child support! Good Job Dad ! If you are only with your child for a few hours, the proper thing and the right thing for her to do is send your child with a diaper bag with everything the baby needs. Diapers, food, change of clothes and any medicine the baby may need. Does she think she's hurting you by not giving you the items that you need to take care of your child for those few hours? I don't care how I might feel about my child's father, I would still make sure my child had everything he/she needed. If you had your child for more than a few hours, then it is your responsiablily ! But I do think you can buy diapers.
2006-07-24 17:57:26 · answer #2 · answered by justagirl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Shoulda, woulda, coulda.
There is no legal reason the custodial parent to provide diapers and such as-sundry goods to facilitate a visit. If you have to pony up for diapers for a "few hours" visitation and a full weekend only once a month, you have little about which to complain. The child support paid by the non-custodial parent is supposed to be to maintain a home for the child. The money you need to expend to have your visitations is money you need to expend and it is part and parcel of being a parent.
There has got to be more going on here than this - this is just too small to be a problem. It is hard enough to be divorced and to maintain a civil relationship with your ex so as to ensure your children are raised in a loving and caring environment - don't muck it up with something so trivial.
2006-07-24 17:20:06 · answer #3 · answered by two 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry Hunter, full custody doesn't mean that she has to supply the things you need at your house. It just means that she has control of your daughters well being. I'm talking about her doctor, school, legal decisions, etc... As for the child support, The amount of child support was determined for her house. Unfortunately that doesn't include your house. Your amount of child support is based on the amount of money your daughter would have access to if you still lived with your ex. And yes, it is a pretty messed up system. That is why there are organizations out there that are trying to change the child support system. Unfortunately I know this because my ex tried to get full custody of both of my kids. Well, she didn't succeed. She only got full custody of my oldest daughter. My son decided to stay with me every other week. Anyway, do yourself a favor and buy your daughter whatever she needs at your house. Remember, she is your daughter and she didn't ask to be put into this position. Just go out and buy her clothes and diapers and whatever else she needs. You will feel better about it in the long run. It sounds like your ex likes to play games to me. Just let her play her games and don't let it bother you. Spend as much time with your daughter as you can, because they're only babies once. Cherish the time you have with your daughter and don't sweat the small stuff. Unfortunately, it's not going to get any easier for a while, I mean dealing with your ex. So, just enjoy the time you have with your daughter and cherish the fact that you get to watch her grow up. Treat her like a princess and never forget she is your daughter. And please, whatever you do , don't stoop to your ex's level. You'll win out in the long run. I wish you and your daughter the best. Daughters need their dads, no matter what anyone else says. God Bless.
2006-07-24 17:40:52 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK buddy here is the real deal. With some women this would not even be an issue. My ex barely pays me child support however when he comes to get my daughter I make damn sure he has EVERYTHING he needs to take care of her as I would if she were with me. I have even given him money so that I knew without a doubt that she would eat because I was scared he would not have the money to buy her food and his pride would keep him from asking me for it. Other women are bitches and can get full child support and still want MORE!!!! With some women nothing is ever enough. If she won't give you the things you need for your daughter you can't withhold from the child support. Your best bet would to just go to the thrift stores and pick up a few things. If you have friends who have children a little older maybe they will give you the things that their children have outgrown. You might as well just accept that she is going to be a ***** about it. Some women are just more concerned about ******* over the man than the welfare of their children even if they deny it.
2006-07-24 18:14:15 · answer #5 · answered by bamabrat1140 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its too much to buy some stuff for your kid....i feel badly for your child, that she is not even worth the small amount of money it will take to have two days worth of diapers and clothes at your house. And if you only have her for a few hours once a week, not knowing how old she is, you should only go thru at most 5 diapers, but the cheap ones, and like someone else said go to the thrift store to buy clothes. Step up to your responsibility, and be the parent you are supposed to be.
2006-07-24 17:24:20 · answer #6 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes I wonder where people think questions up from. Does it really make a difference who supplies the diapers, and clothes? If you were still living in the home this would not even be discussed. Why is it that when their is a split these questions arise. After my first divorce my daughter was three. I had full custody but her father willingly used his visitation, bought clothes, food, etc. When she became a teen he offered to drive her to school , and pay for her lunch. My ex remarried, and still loved my daughter enough to not ask me to supply anything. She's thirty five now with a family of her own, and still sees her dad almost everyday. I nver had to haul him into court, and we ard still friends. Do yourself a favor, and stop this pennypinching. I guarantee in the long run your children will love you for it.
2006-07-24 17:31:26 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
usually yes, thats what child support is supposed to be for, but then again this is a situation that has different points of view, you could sit down with her and discuss this with her and ask her to bring you the suplies that you need because it seems like a waste of money that your child will only get to wear an outfit once or twice before she outgrows it. if you discuss this like a rational adult with her she will probably understand and give you suplies for your daughter, maybe at least have her suply you with a change of clothes and you can suply the diapers and food yourself. if this doesn't work then i guess you have to tough it out and suply everything on your own.
in my situation i always suplied everything for my daughter when she went to visit her mom because i knew the mom was useless, but i also knew i could have pressed the issue and painted mom out to be even worse than what she was by not having the basic necesities for her daughter.
it all depends how you want to go about things, but if you insist that she suply you with everything then she might use this against you
2006-07-24 17:37:35 · answer #8 · answered by zether 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tough cookies! Grow up and be the parent you decided to be one night way back when, when you and your ex decided to have 15 minutes of fun.
You are a father of a child, that comes with responsibilities. That means providing for your child whenever it is needed.
When your child gets older and you take her out for lunch or dinner are you going to send the bill to your ex-wife? It's the same thing. If your child needs something then you buy it and stop your whineing. Sounds to me like your daughter may be older than you are.
2006-07-26 05:51:36 · answer #9 · answered by wetsaway 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Come on! Is for your child and you are complaining about the price of diapers once a week?
Yeah, having a child is expensive. Deal with it...
2006-07-24 17:30:33 · answer #10 · answered by Blunt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No,that is your child to , what is wrong with you buying things for your child. Taking care of your child goes why beyond paying your child support.
2006-07-24 17:37:19 · answer #11 · answered by Jenn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋