Why is it abnormal if a married couple decides not to have children?

Question

It seems like everyones well wishes the bride and groom include happy healthy children. What if a couple opts not to have kids? From my experience, most people think it's odd if a couple does not want kids.

Answer 1

Children aren't for every couple -- never wanted any myself, and have not regretted it for one nano-second. Have traveled the world, know something about almost eveything, have time to read and learn about almost everything (spend 5 months learning to read Egyptian heiroglyphics before going to Egypt) and money to buy what we want, have seen Egypt, the pyramids, Nepal, ridden on elephants to see tigers, photographed lion, leopard, cheetah in Africa, showed expensive show horses, lived in lovely places, never been depressed, nor wondered if we could buy a meal. Never had to put a kid through college, neaver had to put up with the problems faced by a teenaged kid, had time to take classes and learn to paint, and sculpt, (I'm good, thanks to private lessons) and develop talents in poetry (published). Husband never wanted them either, so we just had a lovely time. Both of us have wonderful jobs we love, and had time to go off and be ourselves. It costs more than $250,000 to get a kid thru hs. And they are generally quite ungrateful. As a parent, would have had to give up 22 of the best years of my life to give it away for someone else. No thanks. Have lots of friends, have helped tons of kids, but never wanted one of my own any more than I wanted a white elephant. It has nothing to to with being normal. Couples now have CHOICES. We chose no..... And besides, this planet doesn't need any more people. Every problem EVERY PROBLEM we face on this planet wouldn't exist if there weren't so many people........ So not only do we lead a lovely life, we didn't add to the misery of overpopulation and taxing our already thin resources......

Answer 2

Maybe its not the norm, but it should be a lot more often than it is. I know several couples that chose not to have kids. They like their freedom, don't feel the need to be parents and thats just fine. Nobody should try it unless they think they want to do it more than anything else on earth, its a 24/7 job with no vacations, the pay stinks and there are very few perks and most of the time its not much fun at all. If you excluded from the number of couples who have kids those that are not really good parents at all (you know those that should have remained childless) the number of couples without kids would triple, at least.

Answer 3

People think it's odd because it *is* odd... Most people find reasons to have kids, one way or another. But if you both are on the same page with that, and *don't* want to have children - more power to you. If you're young - I bet you'll change your mind. (And I'm guessing that you're young because you're asking this question; if you were an older couple, you wouldn't really care what other people think, you'd just be set in your own ways).

(To be honest, I don't really have a desire to have children - even though my biological clock should be sounding a full-blown alarm by now. But I will be having them, because I'm thinking about the future, and the need for companionship when I grow older.)

Answer 4

If you are a younger married couple, people expect you to have kids. BUT...this is your choice and your husbands choice. If you don't care to have children or can't for some medical reason, then that is your business. If someone has the gall or rudeness to ask you when you're going to start a family, you can say to them, "Gee, why do you want to know?" Just say something to avoid the question, like asking a question back to the person. You have no obligation to have children if that is your choice.

Answer 5

I wonder what kind of people you come in contact with. It is not strange nor abnormal for couples to opt not to have children. I think it's a noble decision considering the unwanted children we have in this world. If people can't wish you, and your wife well without bringing up the question of children then you either explain your decision, or kick them to the curb. I wish you well.

Answer 6

If you are the bride or groom who was wished well with having children, I hope you just nodded and said thank you.

Some people just like to meddle and need to mind their own darn business. It's up to the couple whether or not they decide to procreate...and most times it's done for the wrong reasons.

Do what you feel is right and ignore the naysayers.

Answer 7

It isn't abnormal, but it is definitely not the norm. Lets face it, it is human nature to reproduce and keep the species alive. Considering though this planets limited resources I see no reason why that will continue to be the norm in the future. I think people need to stop being so judgmental about those couples choosing not to have kids and realize that at this point there is no need to reproduce unless you want to.

Answer 8

I remember telling my wife before we got married that I didn't want no kids and we agree and will raise dogs and cats. But I remember that day she was scared to death to tell me that she pregant and having a baby. She told me and I told her well I guess I am ready to be a father and raise family. SHe like but I though you didn't want children. I told her well, it takes two people make baby and I am not letting you do it all your own. But I know that I will have to work very very hard to be the best father and husband.

Things happen not meant to happen. It good thing couples not want to have kids reason because too many kids are at foster care and too many kids at apotion and so many problem like that and think it better not bring kids to the world. and that a smartiest thing to do.

Answer 9

For it, you can just teach your child about it all... If anything I would think it would make them more open minded person. You can't just pass on being gay to your children so it really shouldn't be a problem. As long as they are responsible and loving parents who cares. I have a friend who's parents are both women and she turned out perfectly fine.

Answer 10

Most people follow the 'script'. If you don't then you are considered abnormal.

I am not having children by choice. Back in the early 90's I was treated very badly, accused of being a closet homosexual, and so on.

Today people don't say such crap.