Is my boyfriend cheating on me?

Question

I had a feeling that my boyfriend is cheating on me. So i was looking threw his phone, and i saw naked pictures of a girl that sent it to his phone..i been with him for about three years,,for the past three weeks we been figthing so much. I've seen numbers that call him late at nite and numbers that he calls also. I ask him about it but all he tells me that he talks to them but has never cheated on me..He says if Im not having sex with them. Then why cant I talk to them. I dont know what i should do? Something tells me to leave him, but then something tells me not to. I need Help?

Answer 1

Well sweetheart it doesn't sound good. If he isn't cheating on you, which sounds likely, he certainly doesn't respect your feelings. If you have expressed concerns about these other people and his respone is "If I'm not having sex with them, then I can talk to them." then it doesn't sound like he cares if you're secure with this relationship.

It's not great to snoop, that is a big sign that relationship is in deep trouble to begin with. The point is not to chastize you, but to say that things had reached the point that you don't believe his denials and were looking for evidence. Unfortunately, you found what you were looking for. No woman sends a man who is "just a friend" naked photos. You know what is really going on here, trust your instincts....you know this situation better than any of us.

The point is what to do now. Sometimes people will know when a relationship is over, but they still aren't ready to leave. Emotional attachments can be hard to break, even when you should. There are people who use cheating as a way to end a relationship to make exiting the relationship easier for themselves...that often makes the person who was cheated on worse though. You need to really think what am I prepared to do? Do you want to fess up to your snooping and bust him? Do you want to play along and wait until you've had it emotionally?

While you might not be ready to move on, I implore you not to embarass yourself. Don't beg this guy to change and stay with you. If it comes to the point that the realtionship is ending, don't disrespect yourself like that, you will regret later---TRUST ME.

I feel you should also think about your part in this relationship. It is very possible that this guy is a massive jerk, who is totally taking advantage of you.....but then the question is why does part of you want to stay in that? Why are you ok with being miserable just to keep him around? Take this opporntunity to learn about yourself and grow, so you can be better for you. Then future relationships will be better too! A good counselor is wonderful in helping to sort all this out.

Good luck and take care of yourself. You deserve to be happy.

Answer 2

First ask if why they are sending him naked pictures of themselves. He should not have that type of relationship with anyone else but you. Second tell him that you would not mind him having female friends, as long as you know them. If he tries to say that you are being unreasonable, then ask him how he would feel if the situation was reversed. Would he like you talking to other guys that he didn't know, or if he would like you to receive naked pictures from those other guys. If he says that he would not care, I hate to tell you this, but he may not feel the same way about you as you do about him. It might be time to find a guy who call love you and give you the respect and attention you deserve. Don't let some jerk walk all over you.. Remember you were doing great before him, and you will do great without. Just do what your hear tells you, and don't let him get you down. Your family and friends are ther to help you through any rough spots and will help you get back up if you do leave him.

Good luck with whatever decision you choose to make. Just remember to make it for you and no one else.

Answer 3

Trust is obviously an issue here. Personally, it doesn't matter if he is sleeping with these girls or not. How would he feel if the situation was flipped? If you were talking to these guys and had naked pictures of them on your phone?

Obviously this bothering you a lot. You will always have doubts in the back of your mind even if it passes right now. You need to be with someone who makes you feel COMPLETELY secure.

People can give you tons of opinions, but in the end, YOU'RE the driver. You know if you're happy or not. Go with your gut feelings.

Answer 4

First off, if someone sent naked pics to his phone, then he wasn't there taking the pics. Second, is it pics of someone at home, or strippers in a club? Third, if someone is sending him pics, then she probably wants him but hasn't had him yet, or else he wouldn't need the pics because he'd have already seen her.

I'm not saying that he isn't thinking about it, just that pics of a nude chick are far from proof that he ever did her. So how have things been between you two lately and prior to this? Have you been ignoring his needs? He will eventually get them satisfied, whether by you or by others, so let him see you naked and take care of your man so he doesn't have to look for satisfaction elsewhere.

Answer 5

Naked pictures on a phone? Late night phone calls? The boy is cheating - if he is not having sex then he still may be doing other sexual activities. If his heart is into someone else its still cheating. Trust your gut. Three years is hard, but the relationship has probably been dead for a long time. You should leave him pronto.

Answer 6

Oh, he's cheating even if he hasn't had sex with her. Psychologically substituting into a monogamous role someone who isn't your partner thus excluding your partner from their proper role in the relationship is cheating.

I know we all have confidants and friends. I'm not talking about discussions designed to seek guidance or general conversation. There's a line in the sand that's crossed when those discussions become a substitute emotional support system that should be directed toward your partner.

And do we even have to mention the naked picures?

Answer 7

Sounds like you already know he is cheating...So quit being in denial and do what you need to do for your self respect and leave him! What I want to know is how could you stay after you saw with your own eyes that he had been sent naked pictures??? That is very stupid and you should of left then.. why do women nowadays have no self worth??? Leave him to his dirty ways!!! Run before he ends up giving you an STD because no decent, respectable woman would be sending naked pictures..so get yourself checked!

Answer 8

If he's not having any kind of sexual relationship, then it's fine. Platonic friends of the opposite sex doesn't mean anything. The naked pictures are kind of weird. If you're young (under 20) then I'd say lose him. You probably wouldn't marry the guy anyways and sometimes after three years a break is needed.

Answer 9

If you've gone so far as to look through his numbers, call history, and pictures, I think your decision has already been made. He may or may not be cheating, because the girls could just be friends. A majority of my girlfriends 'friends' are guys, and I don't have a problem with that. But it's because I know who she's coming home to.

You clearly don't trust him as it is. If there's no trust, there's no relationship. Sounds over.

Answer 10

If he's not cheating how come you don't know them, if they are just friends (I'm sure they are all single) how come you all don't hang out?? Ask him these questions....And don't fall for calling one of them and asking them questions and she'll just tell you what you want to hear (per their plan) I'f you want to leave him, for your piece of mind, you will need to find more evidence then phone calls and pictures. Have a cousin or guy friend call these #s to try and hook up with them see what she's doin and how is she....
I tell you after years of experience if he's talking to another female or females behind your back they ain't just friends...Either something isgoing on or they have history together..........And if they were just friends You should know about it not find out about it. Good Luck!