My husband and I have been married for 13 years almost 14. And he recently told me he doesn't love me anymore but yet he worries about me all of the time. He says he doesn't want us to break up because he doesn't want to put the kids through a divorce. But my thing is, I want to move on if it is over. I love him so much but I am extremely confused.
2006-07-24 07:45:05 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You may love him but if he doesn't love you then it will never work. You sure don't want him to stay with you because of the kids. What kind of marriage is one of obligation? Kids are very perceptive and if the two of you try to live together but aren't happy they will know it. You don't want them growing up thinking that your behavior (being unhappy)is normal. I know that 14 years is a long time to have invested in a relationship but can you see yourself staying in a loveless marriage for another 14? It will take time to heal but eventually it will happen and you can find someone who does love you the way you deserve to be. It doesn't sound like to me that your husband is a bad person but he is just being honest about how he feels. You don't want him to stay with you because he feels obligated to but give him a little credit for offering to. You both deserve to be happy and the sooner the better. The more amicable you can make it the better for everyone involved especially the children. It won't be near as hard on them if the two of you can act like the adults that you are and put their needs first. Children survive divorces everyday and yours can too. You owe it to yourself and to them to be happy.
2006-07-24 07:56:42 · answer #1 · answered by amyclay350 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
They hate it when they bring up the fact they want to split and you don't cry and beg for them to come back! Good for you for not acting like a baby. He thinks there are greener pastures. (Boy does he have a surprise waiting him) Unless you can move out and support yourself and any little ones. May I suggest you live in the same house and each live your own lives. Just make sure he continues to be active with the kids and keep an eye on the money. Use this time to get yourself a job. Remember... No Sex!
2006-07-24 14:56:46 · answer #2 · answered by lily 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he doesn't love you then you shouldn't be with him. Just split up and it he loves you and comes back to you then you can tell he still loves you. If that doesn't work out then get a divorce. About the kids you and him are going to have to work that out. I would be confused too. Even though you love him you are going to have to do what is right if he wants a divorce.
2006-07-24 14:51:43 · answer #3 · answered by shorty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is over---cut off all ties with him, except when it comes to minding the children. Anything else will cost you mental anguish.
Get into another relationship after a while.
When you say you "love" him, you have ask the question---am I willing to accept a one-way relationship. If you do, you other name should be Ms. Doormat.
2006-07-24 14:50:13 · answer #4 · answered by paanbahar 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him the only thing he needs to worry about is making those child support payments on time. You're not about to stay with someone who doesn't love you. Those type of problems you don't need or have room for in your life. Life goes on with or without him.
2006-07-24 15:16:13 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love isn't something you feel its something you DO. Let him worry about you, let him be with you even if its only for the kids. Let him do this UNLESS there is infidelity. Then, sweetie, you either leave, or you PRAY PRAY PRAY that his life will join again with yours. I'm sorry for you and I too will pray for your situation.
2006-07-24 14:53:31 · answer #6 · answered by Raquel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When he comes home from being out late, and has to take a quick shower
2006-07-24 14:48:04 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
what about a seperation some time apart may do some good time does tell.
2006-07-24 14:56:40 · answer #8 · answered by nicole l 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when he don't talk or look at you the way he use to.
2006-07-24 14:52:07 · answer #9 · answered by carzone28 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋