Sometimes I feel like I got married too fast. I got married when I was 21, I'm 22 now. He's the only guy I'd ever been with and I know he loves me so much. I don't think that I would ever find a guy that loves me as much as he does. But I do feel like I missed out on some fun. Then again, I feel like I shouldn't look around when I already found someone that loves me so much. Do you think I made the right decision?
2006-07-24 06:03:37 · 26 answers · asked by So_Wat 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I sympathize with you and your situation. I was married young, went through the motions of starting a family, and then I grew up a little more, and then got bored. As well as my husband growing bored of me.
It's a longer story than that, but in truth, I was looking for excitement and spontaneity. Sometimes we marry someone we think we know, but in the end, we realize we may have made a mistake. In my case, I made a small yet wonderful mistake. I had a child and now I'm divorced. And bored now? Not at all!
You made the decision and you continue to get to make decisions. Throw in some fun with your husband. Go hiking, and swimming, or anything fun you two can do together:) You may get to know each other even better and grow together as you learn:) Have fun:)
2006-07-24 06:14:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Honestly - yes, there's a lot of fun to be had while you're single. But it all comes at a price, there's also a lot of heartbreak and anguish that accompanies it. You can focus on the things you think you might have "missed out" on - or, you can concentrate on the good things you have in the great relationship with your husband. Everyone gets "bored" with life sometimes, married or not. Single people get bored with being single, believe me. It's natural to feel this way every once in a while. If you feel like the routine is pulling you down - try something new. Take a fun class, go on an inexpensive weekend trip, start a fish tank... Most of all - enjoy your time together; if you guys have a good marriage - you made the right decision.
2006-07-24 06:21:34 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't change what is done. Of course being married is not the same that staying single, moreover when you are 21 years old. If you do not have a kid yet, then be honest with yourself and think if you got married because he is in love with you or because both are in love together.
Being loved is nice, but will not help to go through the problems of a common life as soon as they start.
Finding somebody else is always possible, that is not the point for keeping a relationship where you are not happy.
One year is a short period of time to be already bored...it normally should be the best part of your marriage.
Having fun is also empty unless you ever had much in your life.
2006-07-24 06:13:25 · answer #3 · answered by Expat Froggy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I got married at 21 to the man I love and maybe in the back of my mind yes i feel like there is still the what if but I wouldn't trade it for the world. Good love is hard to find, I got so lucky with my hubby hes great to me and we have 3 wonderful kiddos. You and him can now go make your own fun and possibly find another couple to go out with but don't give up the love of your life for the what ifs. Marriage is all about amking fun in you life and with your family. And really you are the only one who can say wether it was the right thing or not, ask your self this if you walked out your door right now knowing you wouldn't see him again how would you feel. Do you love him as much as he loves you? Have fun in it make some new and exciting memories.
2006-07-24 06:11:07 · answer #4 · answered by life as we know it 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I got married young too and I have never felt bored in my marriage. I know that I am with the man that I am supposed to be with and i love him more than anyone else in the world. I never worry about having missed out on anything, I just count my blessings that I found the right guy for me before I got kicked around. If yoau re thinking these things frequently then maybe you ar enot with the right guy for you. You say that he loves you so much but maybe you should ask yourself how much you really love him?
2006-07-24 06:07:07 · answer #5 · answered by heatherdrake2005 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not knowing your relationship, I think you've made the right decision and what you're feeling is natural. It's easy to say, you're married so just stay faithful, but I think that over-simplifies the issue. It's been my experience that from time to time I find myself thinking about someone else. I think more people than admit it feel this way from time to time, the difference is where you invest your time. If you spend it together, things will be fine, if you spend more time alone it's more probable that you would be tempted to cheat. Relationships take time so the odds of something just "happening" are pretty slim.
2006-07-24 06:19:36 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are bored it is your own fault. My husband I got together when I was 18 and he 22. Our marriage is the farthest thing from boring. If he luvs you as much as he says; tell him you are bored and work on ways to liven it up. It does take constant attention to keep a marriage together, if you just let it go it will fail.
My husband and I have a few things that keep it interesting. We have X Mas Sex gift, we try to do something totally crazy for each other just before Christmas. Try lingerie, toys or anything you both agree to. I just let my husband shave me down there, simple but it made him crazy.
It is your fault if you are bored go do something about it.
2006-07-24 07:27:58 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you didn't make the right decision, and yes, you DID miss out on a ton of fun in life.
Girls feel they need to be married in order to move on with their life....so they always rush into it. Then, years later, they realize how much they missed out on in life.
Not much you can do about it now, huh?
2006-07-24 06:24:42 · answer #8 · answered by Nightwish 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Come on!
Start talking with your husband about your wants and interests. Maybe he has the same wants but never wanted to bore you with them.
Don't think about other men. We are probably very much the same in bed.
What you need is to get a more exiting life with your man. Go out to dance, a movie with coffee and ice cream after. Discuss this with him. He might have some marvelous ideas he does not dare to tell you!
2006-07-24 06:14:37 · answer #9 · answered by ranietsd 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
everyone does feel bored w/ any relationship after a while.. ..that's natural. Marriage becomes work (fun work, albeit) after the honeymoon wears off. You'll need to find ways to keep it spicy. ..I've been there and ended up telling my wife that I was bored w/ our sex life and that helped a lot. ..she then was more willing to help keep things more interesting. Try that before looking elsewhere, or you'll likely regret it in many different ways.
2006-07-24 06:08:52 · answer #10 · answered by dwitejones 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋