my gf got raped and she wants a abortion and i want her to have one to waht do you think?

Question

my gf got raped and she wants a abortion and i want her to have one to waht do you think?

Answer 1

well if you both are ok with it, then the only other thing to consider is her parents if she's underage... otherwise what's stopping her?

Answer 2

If she's under age, talk with her parents about insurance, or see if they'll pay for it. It can be very expensive, and many insurance plans won't cover what they believe isn't medically necessary. Abortion tends to fit in this category. Some will cover, some won't. If she's not under age, find out what insurance she has and what they'll cover. Also try talking to Planned Parenthood and look at options there, especially if she doesn't have insurance. There's a good chance that Medicaid won't cover the abortion either though, so weigh that carefully. I don't know about every place, but a friend of mine paid $500 for her abortion. I don't know about you, but for me it'd be easier to deal with the pregnancy then use an adoption agency or safe surrender site (any hospital, police station, and sometimes schools in the US, and in most countries now). Maybe I'm cheap.

Make sure that you get this caught in time (under three months along or 12 weeks) or no place will do an abortion. Inspect your options carefully, but quickly. The sooner you do the abortion, the simpler the procedure, and the less damage done. Right away is best (supposing she just found out from a missed period) or under eight weeks.

As a person above said, she'll probably want/need counseling or therapy of some sort to help her deal with this. Rape is hard enough, but an abortion on top of it can be really hard. Most women who get abortions, even medically necessary ones (and I mean it will kill them) will become depressed or feel guilty. Even if they aren't looking at it as murder, there is a natural instinct to grieve for the lost child. Some people are actually fine afterward, but it does tend to be a rather emotional struggle. And again, it's not just about the abortion, it's about the rape as well. Whenever more than one emotional factor is combined, it usually means for an emotional hurricane.

Other than that, be supportive and know that rape can make a person edgy about certain things. Go easy with her and make her feel safe. She'll need it right about now. If she never filed a report to the police, she should definately do so, and preferably before the abortion. There's a chance that they'll want to try and get a sample of genetic material from the fetus as evidence, even though there may not be enough recognizable (early on, it may be more like a miscarriage so fetal material is too small to recognize). In such cases, the police will ask to work with her medical team.

Personally, I don't like abortion, so I'd just have the child. My husband wouldn't like it, but he doesn't believe in abortion either. If it were me I'd just put the child up for adoption. Of course, the biggest risk with rape is that you don't know what the "father" has, or what genetic problems could arise in the future. Make sure she's gotten tested for STDs (again, if you -just- found out due to a late period, HIV testing may be inaccurate, so test again a month later), though I certainly hope you guys have thought of that already.

Answer 3

Being raped is very traumatic and so is having an unplanned pregnancy. Please don't make a choice too soon because you both are acting out of fear and anger and uncertainty. My choice is to have the baby and give it up for adoption to someone you and she do not know. If your gf tries to keep it she will be faced with the rape every day and may not realize the resentment she shows to the child and will be hurt by her unconsiously. That would be bad for the baby and mom and you, if you are still around. I say wait and find out if the baby is yours also, if you have been having sex within a 3 mo. period before this happened. You don't want to kill your own child. If you both don't want your own baby, put the baby up for adoption and stop having sex before you are ready for babies. The baby does not deserve the death punishment, but I hope the rapist gets a really long sentence and never finds out she is pregnant. Hate the rape but not the baby. Please give the baby a chance, God put it here on earth for a reason!Best wishes

Answer 4

One thing to think of is that the baby is innocent. It would be a kinder act to give this child a chance by keeping it or giving it up for adoption...much kinder than this rapist was. Pregnancy is not going to ruin your girlfriend's body. Abortion could jeopardize her ability to conceive in the future and emotionally scar her for life. It is also important that she be tested for STDs from the rape for her own future health and safety. If you decide in favor of the abortion make this decision as soon as possible, the longer the wait the more complicated the situation will become both physically and emotionally for both of you. Support her as much as possible if she goes through with the pregnancy. It will make it easier for her to give the baby for adoption if you are there for her. At this point abortion may seem easier, but adoption will make both of you feel better in the long run.

Answer 5

Abortion is simply worng, you are killing an innocent baby that has nothing to do with the rape. I would recommend her to be strong and have the baby. If after that, she still does not want it, to give it up for adoption. There are many couples who have been in waiting list for years and that baby could be a precious gift for them, brought fom the sky.

Think about it, I know it is really hard to have the baby, because it will remind her of the abuse, but in the long run she will feel much better, knowing that the innocent baby is with someone that cares about him/her and that she didn't take an innocent baby's life away.

Best Wishes. You need to be there for her and be really understanding.

Answer 6

It is a painful reminder to carry a baby the belongs to a monster that raped her, otherwise i am totally against abortion , so i say if u both feel in your hearts its what u have to do then do it.. unless shes to far along then adoption is a option.. u both are in my prayers and i know after something like this happens its hard to have faith but it'll all work out for the best.. just stand by her and be supportive of her and her decision.. good luck to u both

Answer 7

I THINK YOU are a moron and have NO business in what she does with her BODY!
She does not want to carry a raped fetus to term!
She is the one who makes the choice here NOT YOU!
DID YOU RAPE HER?
NO!
Then if NOT you don't have a say!
What a bloody fook'in moron!

Just give her support and let her heal from this she is going through a hard time and does not need pressure from you!
She can get pregnant again, but I really hope YOU are not the father!
You have no feelings for her...What kind of person wants to keep a baby conceived in a hate crime?

Answer 8

Well, im 13 and i was raped not long ago, I didnt get an abortion, and i dont think its right to get an abortion either. She should just wait cuz there's a good chance that she could have a miscarrige. If she does have a baby though, you could give it to a nice, loving family. Or, you could just keep the baby and love it so much. Good luck!!
-Gracee

Answer 9

I don't believe in abortion, but this is a decision left between the two of you. People on Yahoo Answers have no business in a personal decision of yours.

But since you asked, try to take a look into adoption. There are couples willing to even pay your medical bills and help buy food for her if she's willing to let them adopt her child. It would bring some happiness to an otherwise tragic event.

Answer 10

The child is innocent and does not deserve to be punished by death for the crime of her father. The circumstances of her conception are not her fault. Furthermore, abortion will only increase your girlfriend's trauma and grief. She will become the aggressor, hurting another innocent victim the way she was hurt. There is no justification for murdering a child.

For more on rape and abortion, see:

http://www.deathroe.com/Pro-life_Answers/Answers.cfm?ID=31
http://www.afterabortion.info/Victims/index.htm
http://www.afterabortion.info/PAR/V2/n1/RAPESUM.htm

For more information on other aspects of abortion, see:

Photos of Abortions:
http://www.cbrinfo.org/Resources/pictures.html

A Four-Minute, Must-See Video on Abortion:
http://www.abort73.com/HTML/I-A-4-video.html

Information on All Aspects of Abortion:
http://Abort73.com

Photos and Facts About Prenatal Development:
http://www.justthefacts.org/clar.asp
http://www.abort73.com/HTML/I-A-2-prenatal.html
http://www.studentsforlife.uct.ac.za/foetal%20dev%20photos.html
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/in_pictures/3847319.stm

Pain Perception in the Unborn:
http://www.advocatesfortheinnocent.com/fetalpain.html

Abortion Stories:
http://abortiontv.com/Words/truestoriesfrom-mothers.htm
http://www.abort73.com/HTML/I-G-2-testimony.html

Abortion Risks:
http://afterabortion.info/complic.html
http://www.abortionfacts.com/reardon/effect_of_abortion.asp
http://www.standupgirl.com/site/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=218&Itemid=40

Abortion Deaths:
http://www.lifedynamics.com/Pro-life_Group/Pro-choice_Women
http://www.afterabortion.info/news/abortiondeaths.html
http://www.lifeissues.org/ru486/deaths.htm

Free, Confidential Pregnancy Help (including referrals for financial, medical, legal, and housing assistance; free pregnancy tests and ultrasounds; free maternity and baby supplies; pregnancy, parenting, and adoption information; counseling and emotional support):
http://www.optionline.org/advantage.asp

Answer 11

I think that if you both want it- you should do it. I am surprised that your question is not- What can I do to the bastard that did this to her? Are you sure that she was raped? Are you sure that the baby is NOT yours?? I would be sure before I aborted it. You would not want to kill your own child. As a Christian, I believe that adoption is a much better answer, but I am not here to preach at you.