Ok, there's not really exactly a problem, it's just that my boyfriend and my best friend are really good friends. They have parties together and stuff, and I never really bothered w/ it....I just don't know how comfortable w/ it. I love my boyfriend, and my best friend is amazing and I wouldn't give her up for anything, but it's just strange to see them getting along so well....
I definitely don't want to dump my boyfriend, or give up my best friend.
Does anyone have any ideas on how I can become more comfortable w/ the situation?
2006-07-24 02:43:50 · 23 answers · asked by Anna R 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Well... you never will be 100% comfortable with the situation.
Its not unusual for best friends....(female) to attach themselves to a guy that is considered safe. Like your guy. I've even seen it in families where a younger sister will be all over the older sisters boyfriend.
I've even named the situation as a "practice" boyfriend, where the girl can practice flirting, dressing for the guy, going out, maybe little hugs or kisses on the cheek to see what kind of reaction they will get from the guy.
The problem is....nothing that goes on between you and your guy stays private. Every little argument that you have gets reported to the "Friend" and ends up one of those...Oh I would never do that to you scenario's.
The question to you is...who would you choose...if something did happen between them? Maybe you should ask either one...if you were out of the picture...would they start dating each other. It may be uncomfortable for a bit, but at least you would be able to stop guessing and wondering.
2006-07-24 02:53:53 · answer #1 · answered by werk2much2000 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you are uncomfortable, you just are. The only way you'd feel better is if they stop being so friendly. Maybe you could get a little closer to someone else (another friend) then you won't focus so much on them. Maybe it will make the boyfriend or the best friend start to spend more time with you and less with each other. Then again, maybe it will give them more time to like each other even more-if you know what I mean. So...you can take it like it is or you can take a chance.
2006-07-24 02:54:27 · answer #2 · answered by SAN P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
as long as u know they are just friends, be happy!! it takes an act of congress with some of my girls to make them even consider liking guys i've dated. my best friend hates any guy that likes me until they prove to her they are worthy. that's tough at first. i've been with my boyfriend off and on(more on than off) for 5 years and she just started liking him about a month ago. consider yourself lucky that the two people that care about u the most get along. besides, who knows what u like more than her, and she can tell him exactly what u want
2006-07-24 02:49:20 · answer #3 · answered by venusblu06 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been in a similar situation. I solved it by letting my boyfriend and my best friend know how I feel. Neither of them got mad. Instead, they tried to give eachother some space realizing it was affecting me so negatively.
2006-07-24 02:51:01 · answer #4 · answered by traci00 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They are two special people in you life. You trust them as well as you can ask them. Ask your friend or boyfriend if anything is going on between them. I'm sure they will answer you. If they are reluctant to answer, then maybe there is something going on. Let them know how you feel without breaking their bonds between you. Don't make it seem like you are sure that something is going on because they will think that you don't trust them. Just let them know.
2006-07-27 16:42:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It should be fine as long as the relationships remain the same.
1. If for some reason you and your friend part ways, it would be uncomftortable if your man continues that friendship.
2. You break off with your man yet they continue or go farther.
2006-07-24 02:49:50 · answer #6 · answered by i wear one button suit 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think u should have been more careful from the start u know.
but u should at least talk to one of them
or the tow of them at once.
and tell both of them how does that make u feeeeeeeeel.
dont let anything in this life bother u. be straight forward, and say what u have. honest, logic will solve the whole thing.
2006-07-24 02:49:30 · answer #7 · answered by Musty 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Join in with them giving parties and stuff. Talk to each one about the situation if you are that uncomfortable with it. If you trust him then you don't have to worry, but there must be some doubt in your mind.
2006-07-24 02:50:00 · answer #8 · answered by doglady 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No.. IT IS A PROBLEM..
I know how much it bothers you.. I've been living there before..
You just have to live with that in anyway.. It's just a matter of time before you feel comfortable.. believe me.. there is no solution other that..
2006-07-24 02:50:22 · answer #9 · answered by NICKNAME 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes, when they hang together, you can ask to join, too. But don't do this many many times, 'cause then they'll think you're annoying, and they'll think you want to suppurate between them.
2006-07-24 02:50:16 · answer #10 · answered by Alice_d 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋