i'm a very unlucky person ill-treated by my own people. they misbehaved with me when i was pregnant and needed their support the most. during pregnancy,as everybody knows women become very sensitive and sentimental. when my elder sister came to india (from USA) to attend our brother's marriage, she took every chance to insult me as she is much richer than me and got married at a young age .her daughters are quite big(one is 16 and the other is 12)i am hardly 2 years younger to her but my kids are too small(one is 10 and the other is 3)she boasts about herself and shows me her jewellery. strangely, she sometimes behaves well too sometimes! i just can't understand her. my brother and mother were mute spectators whenever she insulted me . she did not invite me for a ceremony in her house. now i have a function in my house. my husband tells me that we should invite all even though they were not good to us. can anyone tell me what i should do?
2006-07-23 22:40:56 · 22 answers · asked by rajeshwari 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
DO IT FOR GOD, NOT FOR PEOPLE... :)
2006-07-23 22:42:34 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your sister's character flaws are her own. Her behavior problems are her problem. I suggest that you be gracious and treat her as you would like to be treated. When she is annoying excuse yourself, walk away and find something that will occupy your time. When it quits working she will find someone else to belittle because she is a very insecure and insensitive person. You are a lady.
Invite her to your home and be gracious when possible and remember her behavior says more about her character than yours. Don't play the game but take care to see that it does not effect your life. Goodness is always in style and you are a wonderful person. Don't allow a hateful person to effect your happiness. Good luck!
2006-07-23 22:54:56 · answer #2 · answered by jodie 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You know what they did and what they made you feel like. You know in what degree you are able to forgive them if they apologise or not. You have your own life and family. You have probably thought about what it will do to you - how you will feel if you reject your family because of what they have done to you. Maybe the best for you to do is to let them have a small part of your life. Act polite and nice to them, but you dont have to include them and let them do these things to you once more. You can act as you forgive them, but if you didnt - it'll be hard for you. I agree somewhat with your husband though. Let them into your life by inviting them and act formal, polite and nice.
2006-07-23 22:47:04 · answer #3 · answered by Tones 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, she does sound pretty rude. Think about what it would be worth to you to make you relationship better for your family. How far will it take you? Will it be worth it? She also sound like she is just a pretty competitive sister. Maybe there is something about you she does not have that she wants, maybe that is why she is flaunting everything else. She sounds like she needs all of those things to make her feel better. Do you? Probably not. There sound like there is more to this. It is a sibling rivalry thing. maybe your mother and brother didn't want to get in between you two.
2006-07-23 22:46:26 · answer #4 · answered by singitoutloudandclear 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I feel that your husband should respect your feeling and not have her there if you don't like her, or do not feel comfortable in her presense. I also feel that you need to take aside and talk to her about the way in which she treats you. Your mother most likely doesn't say anything because she doesn't want to aggravate the situation by getting in the middle. The best advise I could give you is to talk to her, explain how you feel; and see where that goes.
2006-07-23 22:48:12 · answer #5 · answered by chinalita1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband is a better politician than you.
Your mum and brother may not said anything but doesn't meant that they are stupid. Sometime in order to keep family peace, they choose to ignore some comments she made.
I didn't see you mention about your dad, so your mum is the considered the root of the tree, anytime she goes against any member of the family, she broke a branch so she remains silent is right in one way.
Well, learnt the ultimate art of men, know when to shut your ear....she only comes for a short dinner.... as long as your husband and yours plus your children is closed. That is important.
2006-07-23 22:47:47 · answer #6 · answered by o4r 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Invite - keep the peace. You be the good guy here. Sooner or later soemone will tell to behave herself. Be true to yourself. Your sister has soem major insecurities that she is letting out on you. Remind her sometimes as the 2 of you share genes, she also has many of hte flaws that you do!
2006-07-23 22:45:57 · answer #7 · answered by 40andgoing 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should forgive them.They are your families,you are the most iminate ones.when you really encount troubles,they will be the first person to help you.Sometimes we are bothered by some trifles and we become blame each other,but when we face big trouble,we will feel how tiny things we care.Maybe because we stay together so long,we like to complain for little things.
2006-07-23 22:52:49 · answer #8 · answered by dana 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should forgive them.... you are bringing a new baby in the world.... and he/she diserves a hapy, supportive envirement and family. Look at having your baby as an emotional turning point and invite your relatives. Be a better person than they are and maybe they will return your kindness
2006-07-23 22:45:33 · answer #9 · answered by oxfordblonde_rebekah 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think it's ur jealousy that is speaking. think with a cool head. infact u urself told that they are ur own people. then u should invite them all. and that way u can indirectly slap ur elder sis's ego too. ur husband is quite correct and as the differences in any relationship can be mended with love and affection.
2006-07-23 22:48:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She may have more money but is jealous at you for something you have(more loving relationship?).Next time when she says something mean just ask straightforward"Why are you being mean to me?". Invite everyone,show then you are above her.And be happy she doesn't¸t live close by.Good luck!
2006-07-23 22:48:35 · answer #11 · answered by sanja77 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋