But I fear it is too late to save our relationship. What should I do?
2006-07-23 20:02:02 · 12 answers · asked by The Lonely Skywolf 3 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Continue in counseling. Whether or not you began counseling for yourself (or to try and get her back) counseling can be a good experience for you. It is also necessary. It will take you courage to complete your treatment--you've come a long way by admitting your behaviors.
Your priority is not to save your relationship but to become healthy. You need to take steps to make sure that you don't abuse in the future--and that means placing your recovery first.
Whether or not the relationship is salvagable, you will be assuring that you can have more healthy relationships in the future by resolving the internal conflicts that motivated you to behave in abusive ways.
2006-07-24 12:55:05 · answer #1 · answered by oceana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Often the person who is the abuser has been abused in childhood and doesn't know any other way to relate to people. The abuser says he/she is going to change but seldom does. Because you are getting counseling, you may be the exception.
As for your girlfriend, let her go and find peace. When you are healed, you will find another. You don't need a relationship right now. Concentrate on your growth and development.
2006-07-23 20:09:42 · answer #2 · answered by tina 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Consider it a learning experience and move on. It is too late to save your relationship.
Continue with your counseling. When the time is right, a new, healthy relationship will come along.
2006-07-23 20:07:51 · answer #3 · answered by askme 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you only knew the impact of relationship abuse on a woman, you would never even think of getting back with her..
your ill. you have a sickness. i think you should `concentrate on becoming a better person. or else you might just end up spoiling someone's life!!
I'm sure there would be reasons for your abusive behaviour, probably which are routed in your childhood. but you cant escape the fact, that its not right when you did it!
you cant have her back..
if she is sensible she wont coe back 2u
2006-07-23 20:13:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry dude.
It probably is too late to get her back. Abuse hurts and is scary for the abused person. It involves a lot of trust and if it's not there then you don't have a chance.
2006-07-23 20:14:16 · answer #5 · answered by David W 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that's good that you are getting help but if she's smart it will be to late for you,i was once in that situation and after counseling he almost killed me.so with all due respect i hope things work out for you and you never abuse again.
2006-07-23 20:08:24 · answer #6 · answered by we_c_it 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah...it is. sounds like the worst advice ever...but ive been through abuse and there is no amount of consoluning, im sorrys or i love yous to bring me back to him. you ****** up. and you need to concentrate on counseling to make it work. and maybe an apology too...i never got mine and thats the one thing that'll stick with me. good luck
2006-07-23 20:07:08 · answer #7 · answered by cupcake 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes it is too late. you sound like you went into counselling as a ploy to get her back you sick control freek.
leave her the F alone.
2006-07-23 20:06:48 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be thankful you got the help you need and learn from your mistakes so you won't harm a woman the next time around.
2006-07-23 20:05:45 · answer #9 · answered by eljonez 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let it go, its bad enough she'll have those scars forever, its best for both of you that she wont have to be reminded of it everyday. She probably wont have any trust for you.
sorry, but good luck finding a new girl. hope you can change.
2006-07-23 20:10:27 · answer #10 · answered by dapperflapper 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋