2006-07-23 19:06:20 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It would not be something that I would want in a marriage. If I did not think I could have stayed and been faithful to my husband, I would never have married him! No, I am not in favor of "open marriages", if you have children, then you will be exposing them to watching the dysfunction of their parents. It is dysfunctional if the people cannot bear to continue their relationship unless they have to add other people in their sex lives!
Another reason that I do not approve of it, is because casual sex, and sex with people outside of your marriage, or your monogomous partnership could cause one, then BOTH of you to contract a fatal or incurable sexually transmitted disease. Even if you both always demand condoms in your extra-marital relations sometimes condoms break.
In fact, if you are headed out to look for other partners why be married at all? You could have simply shacked up if you wanted to keep having sex with other people!
Funny you would use the words "spice it up", when all it will probably do is "screw it up"...I do not think it's a good idea, sometimes marriages do get into a rut, why don't you try some role playing with each other, and pretend that you are strangers, who have met in a bar, invite her up to a motel room, order room service, and pretend that you have never had sex with her before, well, I have set the scene for you. Married folks can do a lot to spice things up, without bringing other people into their bed! Please try something that may not have such bad consequences on your relationship. Do something romantic, and surprise her once in awhile with something like a Gift Certificate for Victoria's Secret, and maybe a day spa..Send her flowers invite your same old everyday wife to have a special romantic dinner with you, and do something that isn't routine! Tell her she is beautiful to you, charm her, nuzzle her neck, tease yourselves until the tension begins to build, and see how something like this may spice things up! It could be that you all just need some fresh ideas instead of new partners!
Whatever you decide, I hope you will consider that once you each have stepped outside of your marriage and had sex with someone else, and KNOW this about each other...Things may never be the same ever again.
Good luck! Please try to be creative, if you can't even get your spouse to be faithful to you, it may be that you are not doing all that you could do to be your best for them(?)
Just an idea.
2006-07-23 20:27:04 · answer #1 · answered by ruthie_msw 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Why bother being married if affairs are on your mind? Marriage is between two people. Not four. If you want to spice up your life there are so many other ways to do it. And with your spouse no less. Seek a professional marriage counselor. Find out all over again why you married your spouse. You have forgotten and lost touch with one another.
Extramarital affairs are the next step to ending your relationship not a way of spicing things up. Being open about it with your spouse is besides the point as well. Reconnect with your spouse. It is not too late. Good luck.
2006-07-24 02:37:53 · answer #2 · answered by littleflower 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO NO NO NO NO
it might spice things up at first, but I have never seen a good outcome from this. Usually there is jealousy and often one of the partners leaving to be with the affair person. Trust eventually errodes every aspect of the relationships.
A marriage is a contract and promise of being faithful to each other. What part of that don't you understand?
2006-07-24 02:24:20 · answer #3 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope.. eventually all they do is destroy the marriage, u took a vow to be true to each other, where in the vow did it include sex with muliple people??? Do u believe in the Bible? what about the ten commandments???? thou shall not committ adultery??? .. i guess if none of that means anything to u , then go ahead u both deserve to end up miserable..
2006-07-24 02:15:55 · answer #4 · answered by preciosa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no but it's a good way to find a replacement for either yourself or your partner because even if it's open evntually one of the people will find someone they think they would be better off with be infactuated with then the wedding vows won't mean anything
2006-07-24 02:10:27 · answer #5 · answered by Amy M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely, positively not. Why are you together in the first place if neither of you is completely committed to the relationship?
2006-07-24 02:11:11 · answer #6 · answered by Leah M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no it just shows that neither one of you loves the other and are asking for std are aids so spices it up
2006-07-24 02:31:36 · answer #7 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that's what they said on a talk show i recently watched but if you are notup for it you are not a bad peson and your partner is not a bad person if they suggested it and unless they pursue it against your will then they are cool with you
2006-07-24 02:12:10 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would say no, so neither of your feeling could get hurt. it's better if neither of you know, cuz what u dont know wont hurt you at the end, or just have a 3some
2006-07-24 02:10:09 · answer #9 · answered by nans77 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope.
2006-07-24 02:09:10 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋