Ok having a prob and need some suggestions! Serious answers Please?

Question

Me and my girl have been going out for some time now and well it's been getting sexual, we are both consenting adults over the age of 21, and frankly I think we both want it but my problem is that I keep cuming in the foreplay. I need any suggestions as to how to control myself a lil more. I've heard that it can usually be psychological, and it could be cause I'm scared the condom I'll break and a child coming to this world right now won't be the best news in my life right now. I've tried to just stop the fore play but she ain't having it any suggestions? Or ideas as to what else could be causing this.

Yes I'm over 21, not a virgin haven't been for sometime now, my first time was not what I expected and well I want this to be great, me cumming is not the end of the night it never has been, thank God, but it stills makes me unconfurtable and I quit before we get to the sex. And the pill is out of the questions she's a devoute Catholic and she won't do it.

Answer 1

It's probably because your a virgin(aren't you)and/or because your so sexually excited.Best idea,try masturbating before she comes over,like about 30 min's before.Most guys,once they have ***,cannot do so again,for at least a little while.It is different by who you are.Hopefully,that will help to keep you from pre-ejaculating.Also,if you have privacy,and since you are 21 and legal,you will have time.Try having foreplay and IF you ***,then try showering together,and then resuming foreplay.You are just too excited.IF you were under 18,I'd say WAIT!BUT since you are 21 and in a commited relationship,I understand.Also,PROTECTION is a must.IF your worried the condom will break,maybe she could .in addition to the condom, get on the pill and use a spermicide.This will help if the condom breaks.Stay Safe!!!!

Answer 2

I'm not surprized that your g/f didn't go for stopping the foreplay. She needs that to get prepared for entry and it has nothing to do with your problem. Now, that doesn't mean that she needs to put her hands or mouth on you, that would make your problem worse.

Just for information, there is no, I repeat, no, 100% effective means of birth control, other than abstinance. If a baby is not convenient for you now, it is oral sex for both of you. She can't get pregnant with anal sex but that area is so close to the vagina and any seminal fluid near the vagina can find it's way to an egg. If she took birth control pills and you wore a condom that would be the safest.

To get to your question about "lasting longer". Many men have this issue. You can put desensitizing creams on your penis but must wear a condom over this or it will affect her vagina as well.
The clasic treatment for this is to masturbate when she is not there and condition yourself to last longer. You do this by masturbaiting until you feel yourself getting close to orgasm but are still in control. You then stop masturbaiting, conciously focus on relaxing your penis until that feeling is gone. You keep doing this untill you can stay erect for a long time with out coming to orgasm.

The other part of this is to focus on doing things that make her feel good and to have her come to orgasm as your primary goal,
although I've read that to have no goal at all is the best way. Just to enjoy yourselves and enjoy the closeness you feel for each other. But , back to goals. What I have always done and heard from other men is that when they start to get close to orgasm is to slow your movements and try to think and immagine something that is a turnoff. The clasic thing, that I don't agree with, is to think of dead babies. I think that's too grim, but you get the picture. After your g/f has an orgasm, then you can start thinking of your pleasure. This may seem unfair but it's just a fact of life that women tend to take longer to come to orgasm than men.

The other thing is that even now, before you get better at lasting longer, what is so bad about coming during foreplay? At your age,
one orgasm is not the end of the night. You make sure that the seminal fluid is washed off completely, because even a drop can cause pregnancy, and then go back to foreplay, and pretty soon, you're ready again. Your 2nd orgasm takes longer to arrive at anyway.

So far this has been all technical information. Having sex before
you both decide that you want to marry each other confuses things immencely. Our bodies and minds were designed by God
to not have sex until after we are married. Having sex with someone causes powerful physical and psychological forces to
produce feelings of being in love that clouds our judgement of whether this is a good person to marry. This is true for both men and women. I know that it is difficult to wait, in our prsent culture,
that actually has become pagan rather than the Christian culture that I grew up in. But that really is the best way.

God bless both you and your g/f. Be safe, not sorry. and I hope something I said may have helped.

Answer 3

Some of it could be that you get too worked up during the foreplay & that might be the reason for your cuming so soon. Try to think of something that relaxes you. (like an ocean or somethin) & see if that helps!

Answer 4

Before seeing her masturbate and make yourself ejaculate. Then wait ten to fifteen minutes and masturbate again till you ejaculate again. clean up and your ready for some good slow foreplay. that should work. Foreplay is great before sex. Might have to keep her from your penis as much during foreplay. There are other parts of the body that can be caressed or stimulated.

Answer 5

play with the dinky 1/2 to 1 hour before she comes over. during the foreplay dont focus on it. oh and use the force.

Answer 6

Hey Honey! Don't worry!! I use to have a boyfriend who did the same thing. There is something that really really works. Go to www.slumberparties.com. They sell a product called "Time in a Bottle". It works!! I was very pleased with the results and he was to. Plus, they offer things to help you to. If you have any more questiions you can e-mail me. [e-mail]. Good luck sweetheart! She is lucky to have a man like you that wants to help himself and make her happy also!

Answer 7

if u scared then ask her take pill and u use condom so both will be safe

Answer 8

Ask your Dr. about taking Paxil. I do and it work very well for me.