I have been with my current boyfriend for four years......
IF I say I love him, he says he loves me, too; he never says he loves me first.....
My EX boy friend calls me, and says he LOVES me......
He never said this to me while we were together... !
OH MY GOD!
WHAT CAN I DO????????????
I'm HORRIBLE!
I love them both!!!!!!!!
HELP!!!!!!!!!!!????????????
2006-07-23 17:45:55 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I am 49, married twice, once to a bi,
THIS boyfriend was our NIEGHBOR at the time.......omg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-07-23 18:11:43 · update #1
No you're not horrible; you're just flattered by lover boy, that's all. You better drop the ex and have a nice long talk with the current boyfriend and how much you need to hear him say those special words. Don't blow it all up out of proportion; just be honest with him. Tell the Ex to stop calling and don't take his calls if he continues. He's gonna get you in trouble.
2006-07-23 17:48:48 · answer #1 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Make a list for each one. Pluses and minuses. Be honest and as objective as possible. Tally up the score and then throw it away. You have to figure this out based on what you really feel in your heart of hearts. Why did you split with the old boyfriend? It's been four years, where has he been all this time? Why did he just now decide he loves you?
Lot's to consider but you left him once...
And how did you decide on the new guy? What does he have the old guy doesn't? Who treats you better? Who respects you? Who has the best sense of humor? Which one is most patient and generous. These qualities should be on the lists that you are now uncrumpling.
Answer all these questions and let the best man for you win.
Think of the future.
2006-07-23 17:55:36 · answer #2 · answered by AK 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i have a good friend who is in this type of situation also. just remember when u say it, does he mean it? does it look like he put effort into the lines? But u have to realize that men are forgetful sometimes, thats why we have instant replay on football games. also in the end of your question u say u love them both. if u love ur ex and he loves u, then y did u break up? anyway, whats past is past, but ur not horrible, u can handle this by asking ur current boyfriend how he really feels about you and not just saying a statement. maybe u can find out the total truth. good luck
2006-07-23 17:50:16 · answer #3 · answered by lugasa3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't love them both. You only think you love the first one because he said I love you.
You want your present boyfriend to say I love you first but he never does so the other one says it and you think you love them both.
The truth is you only love the first one but wish he would say it. You think about the second because he says something nobody else says.
Listen you have been with this guy for 4 years. Stick with it. If all you want is for him to say I love you then tell him this and tell him how important it is for him to say it.
He might not know its important to you so he never says it.
Guys sometimes don't pick up on things unless they are told directly.
Guys don't beat aorund the bush. It's either straight forward or they don't get it. If women were more straight forward there problems with guys would go away drastically. Be straight up and don't mess around.
2006-07-23 17:50:52 · answer #4 · answered by Antonio 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You "love" your old boyfriend b/c he now loves you and you aren't confident that your current b/f actually does love you or if he is just saying it. Don't be rash, put a lot of thought into this, its something that you can only figure out yourself b/c you are the only one who actually knows the truth. Everything else is just other peoples opinions and experiences.
2006-07-23 17:50:01 · answer #5 · answered by Mandy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to invite then both over for dinner and after eating - ask them a series of questions that will be helpful to what you need a person.
For example:
1. Why couldn't you tell me that you loved me while we were together?
2. And, why do you only tell me you love me when I tell you first?
Get to the bottom of the problem. Challenge them both!
2006-07-23 17:50:17 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off--how old r u? Secondly--did the ex say it because he is jealous and wants u back? Your ex wouldn't be your ex for a reason. Stay with your current bf if you've got a good thing going. 4 yrs means more than 'ex'!!!!
2006-07-23 17:49:06 · answer #7 · answered by queen bee 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you love your old boyfriend as a friend! your with a new guy so your not likein him like that anymore that why your with this guy if you dont feel your over you ex then maybe you should think the new guy through i wouldnt want him to find out and be hurt
2006-07-23 17:48:46 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't deserve your boyfriend if you are debating this. Break up with him.. Seriously, you are just going to ruin the relationship if you tell him or if you don't tell him.. I feel sorry for your boyfriend.. He doesn't deserve to go through that because you are confused.. Grow up.
2006-07-23 17:49:35 · answer #9 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do u really love them both or do u love to be with them? You need to figure out why you love them and if its just being with them or is it the sex
2006-07-23 17:49:39 · answer #10 · answered by meowbutt2001 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋