he's married, but they are seperated and live 3000 miles apart. the relationship was never about love...the one i have with him is. he comes with a lot of baggage though. i'm not even sure what i'd like you to say... just opinions...no name calling.
2006-07-23 15:13:02 · 16 answers · asked by jb 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Follow your heart, if you think that it is the right thing to do, then go for it. If not, then just be friends until everything is settled. You need someone that treats you right. If he does that, and it is LOVE, then stick with it. If you love him for him, then you love his baggage for his baggage.
Good Luck in whatever your decision!
2006-07-23 15:48:19 · answer #1 · answered by kay mamas 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I guess it would all depend on the depth of love you both have for each other and of course the baggage that he carries. Are you willing to deal with his baggage and if so.. for how long. Maybe you need to sit down and make a pro/con list. See which list has more on in and make your determination from what you see, observe and what the relationship consists of for you. Good Luck.
2006-07-23 15:59:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What type of opinion is it that you would like? If it is a marriage without love and they live so far away from eachother, then he should divorce and commit to you. Otherwise, make sure it's not a marriage where he works very far from home and goes home every so often as if nothing is wrong. You don't want to be perceived as the lover that's just around to have fun with until it's time for him to go back to wifey.
2006-07-23 15:46:01 · answer #3 · answered by BluePassion 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband was technically married when him and I first met/started dating. He went to Iraq on a deployment and his wife cheated on him with two different guys. He told her they were over in July, came home in September. I met him ten days after he got home. He told me that him and her had been married because she was a friend who had gotten pregnant (by another man) and her family wanted her to get an abortion. Being in the military, he knew he could support a family and wanted to "help her out." He said it was never about love, but for the little girl.
Anyway, him and I got together in September and divorce papers didn't get signed till December. It was a VERY hard thing to deal with, especially because his ex really gave me a hard time.
How long have you been with this man? My advice is that if he has no intentions of divorcing this woman, then he is still 'holding out hope' and that you shouldn't involve yourself further with him. If he has plans to divorce and you see it happening sometime in the near future, it means he is more serious about getting out of the relationship and perhaps, more serious about his relationship with you.
Just be careful--good luck with everything. It's not very easy to fall in love with a married man.
2006-07-23 18:23:39 · answer #4 · answered by April 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well. I'm married, and our relationship is about love. But if they are legally separated or if she is seeing someone else, go for it!
Baggage can be hard to deal with though. You may want to think about it before you get involved.
2006-07-23 15:17:07 · answer #5 · answered by Courtney T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless you are coming with lots of baggage too may I suggest you find another catch. Why would you settle for this? Don't burden yourself with this. The baggage is not going to get lighter.
2006-07-24 07:51:22 · answer #6 · answered by lily 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He will tell you anything to get in your pants.How do you know what there relationship is like?Be careful don't fall for anything and everything he says.Time will tell and the truth always have a way of coming out.Search yourself and put your self in the wife shoes.If it was you and he did it to you would you be OK.I've been there But he lied and said that he was separated from me and still living with me,sleeping with me and lying to both.Good Luck and look out for you
2006-07-23 15:29:24 · answer #7 · answered by missmadhatter 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HE IS MARRIED!!!!!There's your answer!!Leave him alone,he comes with baggage?He is causing the baggage!He doesn't love her??Yeh right!That's what he's telling you.No name calling but what goes around comes around.IF ,and that's a BIG if,he leaves his wife,then one day....you will be the wife and someone else will be asking the q about your hubby.MARRIED men are MARRIED men,and are NOT up for grabs!!!!!
2006-07-23 15:56:40 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband was separated when we first started dating and his divorce was FINALLY finalized literally the month before we got married (we had a wedding with 200 people -- any idea how nervous we were that it wouldn't be finalized in time, and to tell my mother ha ha)
However Id think twice if he has kids -- mine pays over $1500.00 a month in child support - I'll NEVER do that again
2006-07-23 15:20:45 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is willing to cheat, what makes you think he won't do it to you? He could just be telling you that your relationship is about love. Why did he marry her if it was never about love? It must have been about love at one point in time.
2006-07-23 15:37:09 · answer #10 · answered by cawecm 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋