tell me your craziest, weirdest, stupidest, or funniest story?

Question

lol we all need to laugh sometimes

Answer 1

i was really young. ok, when i was 5, my family went to a skiing resort. the pool in the resort faced the slopes, and it had floor to ceiling windows so the people on the slopes can see you and you can see the people. Anyway, when it was dark, around 7 p.m. (Winter), my family went swimming. My family is old fashioned so we'd go to the pool with our bathing suits, take along underwear and clothes, swim, then change behind a towel or something. So when I was finished swimming, my mom put me against the wall and held the towel up while i took my swimuit bottoms off. All of a sudden, my mom wrapped the towel around me. I asked why. When I turned around, I noticed that I wasn't changing in front of a wall but a window, some skiier was standing there, laughing about my butt which was, like, plastered against the wall. I was so embarresed.

Answer 2

this is probably weirdest rather than funniest

a partner in a 25-year relationship comes home and announces AS IF IT IS THE BEST THING SINCE SLICED BREAD, as if she won a gold medal or the lottery, that she has spent the night having sex with my nephew in the same room where my son and my sister and her son are [i hope] sleeping - she is GENUINELY bewildered when i blow my top [after three days of being gobsmacked, flabberghasted, thunderstruck, horrorparalysed] and thinks i have got angry over nothing - that i have this anger problem that makes me get angry over nothing

the next day after i blow my top, i ask: well, are you going to see him again? and she answers, very happy at the thought, and completely without fear i might get angry, oh yes!

that's not all: none of our friends say a word against her, are even slightly critical of her, or condemnatory - they give me no sympathy at all - friends of 20 years, people i have saved from suicide according to them - they are not interested in me pouring out my grief and bewilderment - they give me lectures

to me it is like your wife comes home and says: oh darling, i took the kids to the park today and shot them; would you like a cup of coffee? - and you find out she has shot your children dead, and the police and all your friends and family have no criticism of her, they are rather critical of your emotional reaction

this actually happened [the first story] - i thought it was impossible, but it happened - she wasnt faking, she was quite genuine, it was news to her that i had been hurt by it!

in the end i was being brainwashed by it, i had to go around the country asking people: what do you think of this? to strengthen my own view of reality - people said: sick, psycho, unbelievable, bizarre, hideous, and thus restored my faith in my sanity

okay, she went nuts, but how come everyone around us went nuts too? - i was thinking: it must be me who's nuts, they cant all have gone nuts at the same time

a woman said: women go nuts at 48 - if i had heard that before it happened, i might have been a bit prepared!

[i survived - ten years later, im on the road to recovery]

Answer 3

Once apon a time I got 2 points. The end.

Answer 4

Drunk man went home and lay in bed beside his wife.
Afterwards, he said, "wash your mouth and brush your teeth, it smells like hell".
Wife said, "it is not my mouth that you are torridly kissing".
Man said, "yakkkkkkk" and vomitted.