I am struggling with celibacy?

Question

I am celibate and struggling with it. Thoughts of the opposite sex dominate my thoughts more than they should. How can I cope with this? I am kind of trapped in this lifestyle.

Answer 1

You have to be young--probably really young, judging from your post. You don't say which gender though and that makes an answer difficult. I'll try to be general, then.

The deal is that your hormones have kicked in.

For guys, that's going to be a daily thing until you are in your 60s or older. One day, you will wake up and all that strangeness you suffered with for decades and even got used to will be gone away. And--this is the honest truth--you will say "WOW! What a relief!!!!!!!!""

Yes, I am telling you the truth. The "rocks" will be gone and you will feel so liberated that you will leap for joy over how good you suddenly feel.

I can't speak for the females although I know there is something called PMS for them when they stop ovalating and most of them become pretty likable people again. All the weirdness is gone--or most of it anyhow. And on the front end--adorable little easy-to-get-along-with kittens become contankerous cats once the female chemicals start getting produced. Expect it if you are distaff.

OK--with that set up as your evenual outcome either way you are built--how do you handle it?

Two choices--celibacy or no celibracy. Staying with general answers, I advise you to wait until marriage today. Diseases are going crazy--and there's HUGE dangers now that didn't exist 25 years ago.Syf and Gun--those were the biggies for my generations--both cureable by penicillin--no big deal and thus the Playboy Generation and Free Love went sky-rocketing.

You AIN'T GOT that option, question- poster!!!

Scare yourself into waiting until after the marriage vows and then count the incredible joys of sex as one of the foundation stones of your new life-style, partnership, special friendship and marriage-ship.

And get a partner the same way--friend. Two virgins can figure out what needs to get done.

Sure can.

Best wishes. (Do what I told you, OK?)

Answer 2

If you go to church then I would suggest talking to your priest or minister for assistance. Go join a gym and work out that way the hormones that your body is producing would be expelled in other ways and would keep your thoughts down. The only reasons your thoughts are up is because your hormones are up. I have been married for 9 years now and have been celibate in the marriage for the last 4. Personally I never really had that much interest in sex anyway but I do occasionally see someone spark my interest but I dont act on it because of still being married. Communication with anyone supportive is best and find physical ways to eliminate the hormone. Its a physical as well as a mental situation.

Answer 3

This is a novel way to look at it. Are you ready to have a baby? No? How about marriage? No? Then stay celibate and do yourself, and society a favor, helping to keep babies in familes that have two parents who are married. There are enough programs that are full of pregnant teen girls and their unwilling (& unable) boyfriends, and are straining the resources of our country. So, if you're not ready to be married and a daddy, keep it zipped friend. You'll be so glad you did. And so will everyone else. Don't look at is as being trapped. Look at it as learning how to be a responsible male adult. I've never heard of anyone dying from lack of sex. So stop struggling and find something constructive to keep you active, like basketball or skateboarding. When you're ready to be a husband and have a family, you'll be glad you waited. And so will she. <*)))><

Answer 4

Ah, Tomas, I've met others like you. Have you given any serious thought to getting out of the lifestyle trap you are in? Have you heard the saying "you shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free"? If there is anyone you trust who you can talk to, I recommend that you do it. If not, ask yourself if it is worth while in the long run for you to be so isolated. If you have a delicate conscience, so to speak, living a lie won't work for you. Best wishes from one who knows.

Answer 5

Many people are called by God or even just call themselves to be celebate. This is a gift. If your thoughts are bombarded with sex then, you may not be called to celibacy. People who are called to celibacy do struggle with bodily feeling but if they are truely called then, you have to pray to God for strength. I'm sure you already do but in a case like this, Satan wants to destroy your calling of celibacy. On the other hand, you may not be called to celibacy and if not, that's not a sin. It's not a sin to get married and partake in sexual pleasure with your spouse. God is on your side. He's not pointing the finger saying not to have sex or else however, if you do, you do it in the right way.

Answer 6

Well Thomas,it looks like you are getting a lot of worldly answers.My advice to you is to keep in close touch with the father and use scripture to battle your thoughts. You know...like Christ did when Satan was tempting him.A good one to remember is Romans 12:1-2...Therefore I urge you in view of God's mercy,to offer your bodies as living sacrifices holy and acceptable to God which is your reasonable act of spiritual worship.Don't conform any longer to the worlds standards but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.Then you will be able to test and approve what Gods will is.There are many others. The more you study,thee less likely you will be tempted. Also stay out of situations that would put you in the way of temptation.Watch what you read and watch. Bad stuff in...bad stuff out and vice verse.I do wish you well in your endeavor. If what I have said has offended,know in advance that I meant it only for good. Good luck and God Bless.

Answer 7

Why is it a struggle? Are you dating, going steady? In love? If you really love the person you'll protect them, even from yourself. If your ready for a serious relationship, then start looking for someone who has same interests as you, someone you'll enjoy having around. Sex is not a sport, It is not some desperate back seat activity for your car. It is the chance to show the person you truly love that they are so special you will share with them your soul, your heart and your life.

Answer 8

Re-evaluate the reasons for doing so. If the reasons are sound, it might give you an extra motivation to continue. But it may be that the reasons that applied when you made this decision are no longer compelling, or the circumstances changed, or your frame of mind is different. Other than that... you can just play with yourself a lot!

Answer 9

Think about why you have such a compulsion to have sex.

I can't imagine why it should dominate your thoughts.

Either you have it or you don't.. If you don't you are always looking for it.

If you get satisfaction, are you going to look for more?

I have no problem with it... I really never think about sex.

It is not a priority in my life.

Think about why it's a priority in yours.

Maybe you have some deep need for communion with friends? or People? and sex is just a surrogate....


think about why you have a compulsion to think about sex.

are you lacking some emotional need and sex is the easiest way to solve that issue?

This is a human need and cannot be solved by just praying...

Look inside of yourself and your mind...

Think about what you really need that sex cannot solve.

Answer 10

Maybe celibacy isnt for you. Maybe the lifestyle isnt for you. Humans naturally want to have sex, and theres really nothing you can do about your animal instincts.

Otherwise, try to occupy ALL of your time with doing other things. Leave no time for your mind to wander.