Should I try contacting my birth father?

Question

My mother was never married to my natural father. She married my stepfather when I was 3 months old and he adopted me.

I know who my birth father is. I actually got up the nerve to go to his parents' house back in 1994 (I was 21 then, and I'm 33 now)...then I heard he found out about it and got ticked off.

I keep hearing how vindictive he is and everything...but it's been years, and maybe he's mellowed out some. Should I try to contact him or just let sleeping dogs lie?

I know that my adoptive father, who died 6 years ago today, wouldn't have minded me getting in touch with him.

Answer 1

Unless there is a pressing medical reason to find him, I would leave this stone unturned. Sometimes these silly sentiments may get the better of you but often these experiences are not worth the trouble.

I would say, forget about it.

C'est la vie!

Answer 2

I'm 22 and I'm in the same position. I know who my birth father is but I have no intrest in contacting him, the way I see it is the ball is in his court. But every situation is different...