How do you deal with an insecure man?

Question

He's always saying I don't love him.That I think he's ugly,poor,fat.......It's getting really old.And I do love him,he's not fat or ugly.And we aren't suffering.But DAMN!!

Answer 1

You can't make someone feel secure. It's something within themselves that they have to work through. I'd suggest counseling to see if that helps him.

That having been said, I dated a guy who kept telling me I was too good for him. After several years of his drama, I realized he was right all along and ended it. I missed him, but not the drama, and can't say I regretted my decision.

Answer 2

tell him it's more fun to boost his self esteem when he's not asking for it constantly,,,,,,and then when he DOES back off with the desparate hints for kudos, make sure you are there to do it......but if he's just a desparate and constant hinter, he might have some childhood or compartmentalized areas that are beyond you and looking to you to solve his problems, which you can't! if you try the first thing and he still hints & fusses, find out what your insurance covers so far as a counselor visit, and then let him know the coverage and a list of in-network people he could go talk things out with. if you do it in an affirming way, you might really help him through this in a way he's not thinking (sending him to somebody who CAN help him). Good luck cause yeah, that's gotta be frustrating :)

Answer 3

it sounds like you are right, and he is suffering from this I am sure. Has this happened for a long time, or is it new? I wonder if he has a bad relationship with his parents or is he from a bad relationship? Whatever the problem, you can help him.

You know that time heals all wounds, and if you tell him how great he is for long enough, he will eventually forget all the bad things that other people have said to him, and your beutiful words will replace all of the pain he feels inside of his heart.

You do need to stay with him if you love him, everyone has flaws, and at least his is not his fault. I would rather help someone build his self esteem than to have to run around chasing a cheater all the time!!!

Answer 4

in case you want him and are looking for for some thing lengthy time period, attempt to extinguish his insecurities. My boyfriend and that i both got here into our courting with insecurities. all and sundry has em. you should judge. How severe are they? What do they contain? am i able to help him get previous them, or ought to I enable him ensure it out on his own and only be a help? often, men's insecurities are effortless. they don't love video games. tutor to him he's not only yet another pawn and also you'll have his heart very right now.

Answer 5

Sound like an insecure depressed man to me. Leave him alone until he deals with his emotions and security issues. It is not your job to boost his ego, and this is all he really wants. Next, he will be hating you for being successful, brilliant, and all that. Don't get held back. Let him know, you do not have to babify his ***. Let him know you love him from time to time should be enough. Besides, it shows in your actions. Actions speak louder than words. If he is blind, he will loose sight of the whole relationship.

Answer 6

tell him its time he quits saying those things that its not fair to you and it affects you way too much since you really do love him and dont think he fat or poor or ugly. He is looking for attention like a little child, he just needs someone to say that hes not any of those things... but after awhile it gets annoying. So tell him straight up its time to quit saying those things and grow up, or you both break up.

Answer 7

Well i had the same promblem believe it or not!
Well what you need to do is not just tell him that you love him but show him that you love him his confidence is really down right now and you need to show him that he is the only man in your life and that he is everything that you'll ever need and want,
Do something romantic for him, that you'll now he'll love or get him a gift that you'll know he'll love, Just stand by his side in everything that he does and show him that you believe in him and that you love him, If you need anymore advice contact me at [e-mail]

Answer 8

Yeah, listen to these idiots, and leave him---now that'll certainly help things out.

Sit him down, and tell him one last time, (and tell him that), give him the reassurance that he needs. Tell him if there's a reason he doesn't believe you, then tell you what it is.

Perhaps suggest counseling for him and only him but don't threaten him w/leaving. If you love this guy, work with him, tell him you love him but you need him to build his self-confidence and self-esteem, and the first step in that is to cease all negative comments about himself. That's the first step, if you get him to do that, it's downhill from there.

Goodluck & Godspeed......................

Answer 9

Dump him, he is NEVER going to change. He sounds like a marter or a Momma boy! Men like that just make your life miserable. The sometimes change into Dr. Jekyll and Mr Hyde they will start out nice and then verbally abuse you then physically beat you to pulp! Leave know and find a man that is secure and will communicate his feelings with out attachments. think about it do you really need to be trying to prove you love him all the time. Can you really love someone like that for the rest of your life?

Answer 10

Try this: while making love scream out "you're ripping me apart!!!", or pretend to faint. You could also say, "honey, I know it's really tight back there but could we just try it again?". How about giving him a BJ every morning and saying, "I just can't start my day without my protein!".
Actually, these are things that I would like for a woman to say and do to me.