My husband abused two of our three children and they are contemplating giving them to him.. and advice?

Question

My husband did this.. I left him then couple months later I went back to him then he abused me and I left and went to a battered women's shelter. Now we are getting a divorce and fighting for custody. He was charged with 2 felony counts for hurting our children. They are thinking of giving the kids to someone else or giving them to me or giving them to him.... my lawyer isnt very "with it" ..... what are my chances and any other advice you may have would be helpful I love my children dearly although I made some horrible mistakes.

Answer 1

okay i know the courts really well so pay attention...

if your husband had 2 felonys they will NOT give them to him no matter what.... esspessially because it was a felony for abuse...

know you on the other hand they can charge u with chid endangerment if you stayed too long while he was beatin u and your children...

most likely they will not give them to anyone else but you.

as long as you have no record of violence and no felonies you should get them...

ask court officer if you could speak with the judge or majastrate (whoever you will appear in front of) and when you do talk to him... tell him how much you love your children and that youd do everything for your children if you have given something up for them tell him what you gave up (you gave up your husband that you loved to protect your children)


hope i helped

good luck

Answer 2

If he was officially charged with felonies against the children get the documentation to prove it, then with it lawyer or not no family court judge in his right mind is going to give the children to him. But you didn't prove to be an incredibly responsible parent when you went back to him after he did this, so you may not have much of a leg to stand on either, i would have a very good explanation for that prepared if i was you. Most mothers would fight tooth and nail to keep their kids from being around someone that hurt them, not drag them back there. Admitting that you made mistakes and that you see them now and understand the error of your ways should help a lot. Just be sincere and truthful and let them know you would jump in front of a bus to keep your kids safe now that you have your head on straight and aren't being influenced by an abusive control freak.

Answer 3

First, I'd get a new lawyer. See how it pans out in court. If you don't get custody and your abusive husband does...well, I can only tell you what I would do in that situation (as I love my children more than my very life). I would take my children and disappear with them..."go underground"...just so they wouldn't have to grow up being abused. Who to contact for that? I don't know really..never been in that situation myself...call the local battered women's shelter and see if they know anything about that kind of stuff (new identities,etc.)...women have done it before.

Answer 4

First of all, you need to go before the judge and request a Guardian Ad Li tum. It is sort of an attorney hired by the court to represent the children and they have to by law do a full investigation. I don't understand if he was charged with two felony counts of abuse, why they would allow him to have custody of the children. Contact this agency that has political influence and pull www.protect.org/agenda.html , then contact your local television station and newspaper, they will more than likely do a story on the fact that I court may even consider to give your children to an abusive father. Good Luck and God Bless you...

Answer 5

What do the people at the shelter tell you about your chances? Have you told them everything about your mistakes? Have you told your lawyer everything? If you don't think your lawyer is with it, you must not passively accept that. Prod him/her or get another.

Do your mistakes include abuse/neglect/or what? What is his abuse? What is the liklihood he'll be convicted? (Won't that eliminate the problem?)

If you are a good enough parent and he is an abusive parent, you should pay close attention to what's happening, plan careully, and be prepared to protect your children against all those who would hurt them.

Answer 6

Do everything in your power to keep him away from those kids.

From going through a divorce myself I have learned that you have to document everything. Take pictures of injuries he has caused. Call the cops with each incidence. Get witnesses.
Call the DA's office. Get another attorney.

Go to your newspaper or local TV news and get the story made public, The judge and attorneys will HAVE to face the public.

Continue your connection with the battered womens group.

Don't feel bad about making mistakes. You are learning to do something that you don't have skills for. Now with what you have learned you are better informed to take care of yourself and your kids.

Be the strong woman that your kids need to keep you all safe.

Answer 7

It all depends on the state that you live in but I would suggest you get a better lawyer!!!!I would suggest that you do what it takes to get full custody by getting your life all in a rowsuch as a good job,a nice place to live and even enroll in a class or two a week to improve your education. If getting your children are as important as I believe it is then you have to do what is neccessary to achieve that goal! Do not let ANYONE stand in your way!Even if you cannot afford a good lawyer ,do what you can on your own! Like I saiid make it look as good to the judge as possible and stick to it. Put your life in order!!!!Try to saty away from state assistance!! This way they don't look down on you for that,,,Well Good luck to you!!!

Answer 8

If you lawyer not going to work it out and then you need to find different lawyer if you really love yoru kids and you should tell judge fine I do anything you want me to do and will fight for my kids back. I will proof you that I am a good mother who made mistake and it will not happen again and you have to have faith and trust in me and If I mess up and then. But I love my kids more than anything in the world.

Answer 9

Get a new lawyer first of all, this one sounds like a real dumb *** and hes obviously not doing his job right... Ummm if your kids are a certain age they get to choose who they want to go with.. Consider that. Maybe gather some support and some character witnesses to help out your case. Oh and dont make the same mistakes again

Answer 10

what mistakes have you made that would make the courts consider placing the kids to someone else. With 2 felonies for abuse he won't get them. If your lawyer is not 'with it', get another one, it's your money aqnd you are paying him to represent you.