Why in society are we judged?

Question

Why do people say "Dont judge me" but turn around and do it? Why do we have to wear "prep" type clothes to become friends, and if you dont are teased and treated badly? I myself am "punk" and am treated terribly among even ADULTS, why? No one likes it. Preppy clothing is considered the RIGHT thing, who says? Is god not going to let you in because your not wearing the right clothing? If you like it, wear it. I mean really, who says preps are always right? Or even punks are always right, because of the clothing? Its the person and opinions that matter.

I understand that we are judged for what we look like even in adult hood and im okay with that but its annoying that people think there is only one good way to live life, when there isn't you can dress one and ill dress another and i wont hate you, so why must they hate me? I rarley get in someones face unless they do MINE i know i shouldn't fight back, but its who i am i just dont get how one person can shove their opions in my face and get mad when i tell them mine.

Sure I've judged people, I do, its who I am but I dont ever take it to the extreme to send hate mail because they dont dress like me. Its just life and honestly I don't care that much, I just thought to see what y'all think

Answer 1

You know what? You are not the first person to ask that question, I ask that all the time. My guess is that when people are afraid of change or something else, they instantly assume that it's not normal. Usually, they don't understand the reason why certan things happen. And if you like the way you look, then tell people "I don't care about what you think, I am happy with myself." I do it all the time. I think that it's awesome that you want to be yourself and don't ever change that! I'm glad that you want to be you and not someone else! That's really cool!

Answer 2

Ah well, that is quite a can of worms my dear.

We were all punk when we were in school - well, me and my friends - and I can tell you, school is what breeds that sick nonsense - even in the adults.

Consider this:
Public schools came about at the time of the industrial revolution to a) do something with the kids while the parents worked in factories (that's why in america there is the summer off - the kids were needed for harvesting) and b) to generate future factory workers. With so many more children than teachers you would have to figure that the teachers have limited time and energy to allow individuality so conformity (dreaded conformity) was created to get the job done. You probably know all this, but this has been the condition for around a century, so virutally every person has been affected by this.

In comes punk - very often ugly and offensive - for the sole reason of what? Non-conformity, right? To shock, to annoy, to make others as uncomfortable as the idea of conformity is to us, right? Nobody likes that. It makes them uncomfortable - it has exactly the desired effect, only too well. It is a self fulfilling prophecy. Punks display anger and rage and get more anger and rage for their trouble.

The school setting makes it worse, of course - then it is time to get a job, and it starts to fade in our day to day life. We begin to understand that it is ok to feel however you want, but leading with that chip on the shoulder is not the way to get what you want when it comes to a good job and a fun life.

It was never about preppy - it was just normal people. Of course preppy gives the feeling of affluence which people want to make nice nice with (lest money falls out of the pocket, I guess).

It IS the person and the opinions that matter - and in my experience it was the punks who were the smart ones who had individual talents and greatness within them, which can explain the disgust for the system. The problem is how to get that message out there.

There are ways to be heard and there are things that people do that we automatically tune out - like when some one approaches you saying "have you heard the good news about Jesus?", even you, very likely, turn on your heel and walk away. Now if that same person chatted you up over a beer before he said that, you might have listened to what he had to say - or if he was the most handsome man in the world.

Don't take it personally - and if you don't want people to get into your face, perhaps you need to start by not getting into theirs. Or not - it is your life and a free country. I personally am always warmed to see the pink haired kids in the street - you are all destined for great things, I think.

Peace!

Sorry for the ramble - xoxo!

Answer 3

It is human nature but god only has the right to judge, me myself wear all different types of close I don't dress one way I wear whats in style, and allot of punk clothes are. I don't think people should judge someone by what they wear, but for who they are, and the people we call preps are just mindless flossies who do everything that they say we are doing, more preps do drugs and have sex more often than the people that people they make fun of and start rumors about. the adult are just that way because they are scared and feel intimidated by it because people in their time did not dress like our modern day teen ages. People need see that your style is just a expression of who you are, and your not a bad person. I suggest you stay the way you are, and don't change for anyone take care dear god bless.

Answer 4

People who judge others are insecure about their own inner selves. We dont have to wear prep type of clothing or even punk type of clothing to become or remain friends. Anyone who judges another person of simply their clothing or hair style is extremely shallow. You dont judge a book by its cover.. so why do some people judge others.. simply because they feel that they have the right to do so. Yes they are entitled to their opinions.. however to make the assumptions that a person is in with crowd or out with the times only by the clothing on their back.. are indeed wrong. I have met alot of people in my life.. some dress nice.. some dress not so nice.. however I do not look at their clothing.. its the person on the inside is who I see.

Take away everyones clothing.. what do you have? You have poor naked people.. rich naked people..ugly naked people and beautiful naked people. .. but we have 2 things in common.. PEOPLE and being NAKED

I agree with you but in the real world.. people are very judgemental.. of course..... until they have been on the receiving side of the judgments of others.

Answer 5

Peer Pressure. It is difficult to be different when everyone else is the same. It takes lot's of strength. It is human nature, sometime's there is nothing you can do. We humans, have a built in Social Sensor, where we try to fit in to our environment. It's called evolution, that's how we progress, by adapting to stress. We are judged most of of the time due to lack of experience on their hand. They are naive. They have a certain image in their head as to what is normal and acceptable, because that's the way they were raised. Stay out of their way. Ignore them.

Answer 6

Its because people are meant to compete, people want to value themselves so bad that they have to pick a side. Its a reflexion of the soul. Do u want to be with the great big body of people or do u want to be with a small and queer, yet interesting group? how much value do u put on yourself? Ive gone thru various transformations myself but it was really my soul doing the changes, and Ive picked no side, if picked maturity, and i don't like looking like everybody else, i love change, and i see beauty in lots of interesting places, i do care what people think of me to a certain extent but i care what I think of myself more.

Answer 7

I've said it once and I've said it again and again- being a teenager sucks...the "judgement" of which you speak continues into adulthood in the workplace so get used to it...lots of things in life aren't fair but we have to learn to deal with them...

Answer 8

Exactly. I've been saying the same thing for years.

Answer 9

It's human nature.

Answer 10

Ignorance of others