Should I stay or leave?

Question

The problem is my husband is so controlling, jealous, &down right mean 85% of the time.When we first married he didnt want me to work, but when I kept complaining about him not paying the bills but buying beer & his extras he insisted I get a job. Iwent & got a job at a hotel & every morning he would fight with me accusing me of cheating & so on.All I would do is take my kids to the babysitter go to work and pick them up & go home. So I finally got sick of it & quit &now he is fighting with me about not working .I stay at home all day if I go to the store, to his parents to take the kid to swim He just fights with me so now we dont go anywhere. I feel really uncomfortable around him because of his controlling and jealous way so I don't speak much. Now he has gotten to the point of calling me every name in the book and tells me he doesnt love me. I'm not allowed to go around family but he goes to the bar till 5a & spends bill money on his fun while the kids & I are at home with nothing

Answer 1

GET THE HELL OUT OF THERE NOW. CALL THE DOMESTIC VIOLENCE CRISIS LINE AND THEY WILL HELP YOU. GO NOW.

Answer 2

I have the same in some of it but not all, mine always make sure the kids have and everything but he does like his bars and hated when I did work and when not complained so get ya there, if he is that bad and you cant go anywhere and have a life then maybe should go, you need one as well not just him, and if ya stay you will get hate for him and its not good, take care of kids and make them happy not him its the most important good luck,

Answer 3

I can only hope that you know, in your heart, what the answer is. GET OUT NOW... if you cannot make the move for yourself, make it for your children. This has to be affecting them in a negative way. You deserve a life, not just struggling and fighting and bare existence. Turn to a family member or friend, a minister, priest or the social service agencies in your area. Don't sit around and waste your time on a...can't even call him a man.....who calls you names and tells you he doesn't love you.....Find a way and get out!!! Best of luck to you and your children!!!!

Answer 4

So what you're saying is 15% of your life is good? Is that enough happiness for you and your children? This man is never ever ever going to change. If you stay with him your life is never ever ever going to change. Honey take your children and leave this sorry excuse for a man and the next day go to legal aid to get child support. You really don't need this.

Answer 5

I once read that deep down we can only truly love the people who enable us to feel good about ourselves when we're with them...obviously he hasn't and isn't willing to provide you with this wholesome sense of self and wellbeing. It sounds as though he's committed to making you and himself miserable. Is he angry with you because he himself can't seem to find a way to call the marriage quits? Do him and yourself a favor and (like Dr. Phil would say.."be the hero") make it stop. Leave if that's what it takes.

Answer 6

dear....I am not as patient as you are. One outburst...just one, and I would leave. I am not forgiving when it comes to that. I would seek the help which is available to women in your situation and take advantage of it. Some women MUST learn that men who are controlling and think that they own their girlfriend or wife is unacceptable. These guys only do that with women who will LET them.

Answer 7

I think there is no question. You should definitely leave unless you want to keep living the way you are.

Answer 8

You need to get out of that relationship it is mental and emotional abuse and when your children grow up they will think that is a normal way to treat a mate. And please get counseling for yourself and your children.

Answer 9

YOU SHOULD MOST LIKELY LEAVE BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT DOING ANYTHING THAT IS MAKING YOU HAPPY WHATSOEVER. YOU SHOULD TRY TO LOOK FOR HELP IF YOU THINK YOU NEED HELP BUT IF YOU THINK SO OR NOT DO ONE THING. LEAVE!!!