Some people tell love stories, others tell horror stories...is marriage just a business deal, or is it worth the trouble?
2006-07-22 06:39:45 · 45 answers · asked by gokart121 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Gokart, it's just like anything else in life. If you find the right person, it's bliss. If you don't -- well, that's why divorce was invented.
Is it better being single? Well, singles don't have the problems that some married couples do, but on the other hand, they don't share the advantages that married people do.
Of course, if you're looking forward to having a family, it certainly helps if you're married...
Bottom line? Marriage isn't just business deal. That sort of attitude will absolutely kill any marriage. Nor is it a thing of convenience. In a true marriage, you and your partner are very much attuned to each other, look after each other, promote each other's interests, and support each other, in a financial way, but in much more than just a financial way. It's really great when you have a down day, to come home to someone who says, "Hey, that was then, this is now. Let me pour you a cool glass of wine, we'll sit in the back yard and watch the fire flies."
Sounds silly, but that's the sort of moment that marriage thrives on.
2006-07-22 06:45:43 · answer #1 · answered by old lady 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Married life isn't all that it's cracked up to be. That is why half end in divorce. Definately don't rush it. Being single has its pros and cons also. Just because you are with someone doesn't guarantee good sex, an end to loneliness or constant positive regard. These things have to be worked for no matter who you are with. Marriage requires both to be committed to working things out and even then it doesn't often work. If you aren't sure, then don't do it. There is a business part of it, the finances etc. But the intimacy is the hard part. If you can communicate on a deep level, have mutual respect then the rest will work out. If you don't have that or can't get there nothing will help.
2006-07-22 06:55:06 · answer #2 · answered by doryanne949 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it depends on your partner. I've had a marriage where the guy was complete a$$, and then I found this guy, who is damn near perfect. Our marriage is rocky at times, but that comes with ANY relationship be it romantic or friendship. I'd suggest finding a person who you can see yourself spending the rest of your life with, then getting married. If you've already done so and are just getting cold feet, then take a tep back and do a pro's and con's thing. Marriage is a binding contract between two people, it's no small deal. That and divorce costs way too much dang money! lol, so my advice to you is to wait until you feel it's perfect!
2006-07-22 06:49:36 · answer #3 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Experience as much of the life you want before you get married. I always wanted to do other things like travel that just aren't possible with a family and responsibilities. Everyone can live with the things they love, like or think are great about someone, that's the easy part. Find out all the things that you don't really like or think are annoying about the other person. Then figure out if you can tolerate and live with those things. People don't really change even if it's something you don't like and they say they will. You have to be able to agree on the big issues like money, are you both savers, spenders or one of each. Religion, ideas about discipling kids. If you would let them eat candy all day and your wife would make them stand in a corner for 5 hours as a punishement, would you really be able to live together happily. As far as sex, can you fulfill each others expectations as far as how often, will she accept porno, etc.. I know it seems to kinda drag the fun out of dating leading to marriage, but if you don't really know all that stuff beforehand you'll be miserable later. I know, I'm still dealing with some issues now after 15 years of marriage.
2006-07-22 06:52:50 · answer #4 · answered by laugh 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds such as you at the prompt are not waiting to be in a faithful courting. when I met my husband I knew i did not favor everyone else, and that i did not experience like i replaced into giving up something. you're both somewhat youthful, and were given married for the incorrect reason. At this aspect that is unlike you are able to get divorced and in basic terms bypass lower back to courting him. you need to come to a decision what you favor and take it from there. It feels like both of you argue a lot. perhaps you need to look at marriage counseling. Being married isn't elementary, even once you adore the fellow and recognize he's the right one for you. you're 2 diverse people, and there is going to be circumstances even as issues do not bypass easily. Marriage is make certain, and compromise. i imagine a counselor may help you style your thoughts out.
2016-12-10 13:36:00 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on how you feel. I am happily married but we have our rough patches. I would never divorce my husband. Do you enjoy being single? I have a friend who has been divorced for 16 years and she enjoys being single again. She is not in any kind of relationships and has not intentions of being in another one. I myself enjoy being married. There are two incomes, someone to talk to, come home to every night.
No I don't think marriage is just a business deal...it is kind of like a job though..you have to work at it and learn about each other and be able to talk to one another. Unfortuneatly, people treat it like a business deal, especially when they marry for money. And nobody wants to stay together anymore. You just have to make sure that the person you marry is the right one for you.
2006-07-22 07:35:27 · answer #6 · answered by Barb 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It all depends on Who u are as a person and who ur spouse is as a person.. if u dont have a "MAN" mentality.. which means that u can own up to the vows u took every day not just just when its convient for u .. Men do what is right now matter how it "feels".. And a mature woman, does the same, she takes her vows seriously and not just a promise she took during the wedding, vows are a promise that u are to live up to every day..
You protect your family, and you spouse from all negitive influences the best u can.... relize no matter what your spouse has to always come first.. So if u can go into a marriage knowing its more then saying a few words on your wedding day.. and own up to them.. then the chances of having a healthy marriage are really good..
2006-07-22 06:48:58 · answer #7 · answered by brwneyedgrl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is worth it. I've been married to my best friend for two and 1/3 years. It is like having a sleepover except for when the kids wake up in the middle of the night. There are troubles too, but remember you have to work to keep a marriage going. Nobody is perfect.
2006-07-22 06:43:14 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stay single. If you marry you'll regret it. The only reason to ever get married is that you want to have lots of kids. If that's not your goal just live together but be careful some states will consider that marriage if you do it for to long so sign a contract of non responsibility. Nothing says i love you like a legal document.
2006-07-22 06:44:14 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a very important step....it has it's advantage and disadvantage!!! example:
1-Sex everyday!!!!
2-Share your life with somebody u LOVE
3-To have your own House, your own stuff
4' TO HAVE your own BABY'S
5-To come home to somebody u trust and LOVE
DID I mention SEX EVERYDAY!!
1-mmmmhhh!!! I'm trying to get some bad pointers....But I will get back to u on that one..till this day...I haven't find a bad reason not to be married!!!! sorry!!! and yes it's WORTH the trouble if u have any!
BUT enjoy your life as single THE BEST YOU CAN, so when u are married you will settle 'cause you already enjoy the single life, ok?
2006-07-22 06:47:45 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋