The guy I luv now is the my first bf. We have lost contact for >10 yrs and when we met again, we fall in love again. His relationship with his wife is not gd. Same goes to me. We have been very very close. He will not divorce because of his kids but we love each other very much. I'm afraid to divorce because I dont want to be his mistress. We will miss each other very much especially weekend when we can't meet coz have to entertain the person we are not happy with. I need some advice on how to deal with this miserable love life.
2006-07-21 23:08:54 · 24 answers · asked by confuse 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Have an affair with you lover, and enjoy the time you have with him. Remember that this could blow up in your face, so be discrete and careful.
2006-07-21 23:12:44 · answer #1 · answered by Jim C 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Way too many of us seem to want to live in the past whenever things get either tough or boring. The past seems safe. But we are talking about your present and your future now. Leave the past in the past. The boyfriend must go! You made a commitment to your husband - 'til death do us part - for better or for worse. Take a look at your wedding album or video if you have either. You married your husband for a reason. You need to rekindle that love you once had for him and commit to loving him and him only. The notion that divorce will make things better is a big lie. You have no idea the cesspool of garbage a divorce will bring! Stop thinking of yourself and think of how you can love your husband instead.
2006-07-22 00:36:27 · answer #2 · answered by Dan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to grow up, both of you. The biggest mistake you can do is be with someone because of kids. You and your lover need to talk and come to the agreement to leave the ones you're with. Everybody deserves to be happy and looks like no one is. The kids will be okay, just have to explain to them the situations. Don't just drag others alone. Make the decision that you both should get a divorce. I'm pretty sure the kids see them arguing and you think that's good, no, so just save it and do the right thing. How can you even be with someone and not love them, your lives seem like hell. It's a sin to continue to see this other person and you're both married,so I suggest you do what you gotta do and get a DIVORCE! You deserve to be happy, so just do it. God Bless
2006-07-21 23:27:17 · answer #3 · answered by freemantalia 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first of all you should tell your husband about the affair! I mean, how would you feel if he was doing the same thing to you as you are doing to him right now? For Christ sakes, leave the married man along! He has children and has made the statement to you that he don't want a divorce! I think you husband should know, divorce you, and let you go on about yourself! Obviously you husband is to good for you, you are the one cheating!
2006-07-21 23:14:09 · answer #4 · answered by *~Princess~* 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are unhappy, then make a move. Get out there.
But remember, you are moving because your are unhappy. If you go to this other guy you will mess his wifes life, his kids life and then you would have been to some extent, selfish, but happy.
Personally id forget both, you are not doing either any good by sticking around. You do deserve to be happy, but please think about the others (especially the kdis) before making a decision. It's your chance to shine.
2006-07-21 23:13:50 · answer #5 · answered by englishkeymaster 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The other man is taking u for a ride. he is not ready to divorce his wife & want all the fun & attentions from u.he can never be in love with u.plz chk it & take a mature & sensible decision before things go out of ur control
2006-07-21 23:54:01 · answer #6 · answered by sduhbls 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hell, why should he get divorced? He has a wife AND another woman better known as a MISTRESS. I wouldn't get a divorce either. WHY should I? You need to break it off with this guy or dump your husband.
2006-07-21 23:15:31 · answer #7 · answered by GRUMPY 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your relationship won't work unless you both get your own relationships in order. If your relationship is bad enough that you are in love with a different man, then it's time to be honest with your husband and leave. After you both get that straightened out, your relationship may have a chance.
2006-07-21 23:12:43 · answer #8 · answered by Adalina 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you know who the "Author of Confusion" is?
Your marriage needs prayer and counseling, but having the affair...AND YES that is what you are doing!!! It will ruin not only your spouses lives, but the children as well....Do What You Do....But you know what is right.
JOB: 15-24
P.S. I had this happen to me & believe me when I say ....I have to recover 1 day at a time when it comes to trusting women...Be Strong.
2006-07-21 23:15:36 · answer #9 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
work on your marriage... you got married for a reason try to recapture what it was you loved about your husband that made you go so far as to marry him. Vows are sacred and very important not to break unless you are being beaten up or verbally abused every day. If none of that applies... try to work on your relationship.
2006-07-21 23:13:10 · answer #10 · answered by kitkool 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are simply acting like a DOG....tell your husband you r a dog and you are not good enough to be with him and be part of a family.
THEN call your bf wife that has his family, tell her that he too is a DOG....then maybe after you two have been honest with the people you been lieing too (family) then maybe you two DOGS can hook up....
2006-07-21 23:24:33 · answer #11 · answered by Long T 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋